


First Love

by Steph_Winchester



Series: First Love [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Destiel Smut Brigade, Destiel Week, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, M/M, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-20
Updated: 2017-09-01
Packaged: 2018-10-08 13:21:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 22
Words: 68,875
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10387554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Steph_Winchester/pseuds/Steph_Winchester
Summary: Dean is in love with Castiel ... Castiel is in love with Dean.The world in a small religious town is anchored in the past. Raging homophobia bleeds the town, a killer is on the loose.Dean and Cass would have to keep their love hidden, it is a matter of life and death.





	1. The first time we kissed

Sam was sitting with a group of friends by the benches when Dean arrived. There were a group of guys playing soccer on the field behind them. Sam´s dorky friends were very nice but they were too young and too impressionable for Dean´s liking. But his brother had a great heart and even bigger brains so he fitted perfectly with them despite being a tough kid.  
"Hey Sam, ready to go?" asked Dean. Sam´s friends felt a little intimidated by the appearance of Sam´s bid brother and they made themselves scarce.  
"You scare my friends away Dean" said Sam with a goofy smile on his lips.  
"I am not that scary" said Dean- I don´t bite…  
"Right!" scolded Sam "Mr son of a cop, the team captain and perfect hair …perfect cheerleader boyfriend material…" said Sam this last thing with a funny smile on his face "if only the cheerleaders knew…"  
"Yeah, if only they knew I could also be their brother´s boyfriend " Dean smiled.  
"There is plenty of fish in the ocean… mon Captaine” answered Sam "Haven´t seen anything you like so far?"  
"I .. Kind of..." said Dean blushing a little  
"Woa woa wait? You like someone? Who!" Sam felt excited for Dean but he obviously already knew "tell me!" but Dean being so open about his feelings... that was new  
"He is actually playing soccer on the field ahead just now" Sam was about to turn around looking for Castiel "eh! Don´t turn around like that, jezzz you need to work on your skills man… you are too obvious."  
"Ok, tell me which one" they both sat on the bench, Dean was facing the parking lot while Sam was facing the field looking for the man while Dean described him.  
"He has dark hair, always messy and spiking in funny directions, his eyes are blue, beautiful eyes, the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen. Do you see him Sam?" Dean asked  
"Not jet, keep describing him, don’t look" of course Sam was looking at Castiel, he knew him from class and listened how Dean was describing him. He signed Cass to come close and made him a gesture to be silent "Tell me more about him. He has to be an interesting guy to call your attention…"  
"His smile is honest, loving. He is dam hot to be honest but that is not what I like the most about him Sam" said Dean "Do you see him now?"  
"I do Dean, is the blue eyes what you like the most then?" asked Sam looking at Castiel´s surprise face while listening to them. He was blushing wildly.  
"No, no, his eyes are amazing but it is how he behaves, I saw him helping a kid that was being bullied last week. I know he volunteers in the dog shelter, he cares about his friends, he is brilliant I saw him on the debate club and woah he took my breath away … I wish I had the guts to talk to him…" Dean pushed his face on his hands "but why would a guy like him be interested on someone like me?" Dean expected Sam to say something. But Sam had stood up long ago and indicated Castiel to sit in his place "oh god Sam! At least I expected you to think I was worth get knowing…" Said Dean annoyed by his little brother´s silence. He turned around in the bench to see what had Sam so silent. Castiel was sitting there, looking at him with his blue eyes full of emotion.  
"I do think you are worth getting to know Dean" said Castiel in a low voice "I never thought that a guy like you would be interested in knowing someone like me" Dean was lost in Castiel´s eyes.  
"Why? You are beautiful Castiel, inside and out." Dean said without further thinking.  
"You have dated cheerleaders … I thought you were straight" Castiel said  
"I am bisexual" said Dean "but I only dated them because I was too much of a chicken to ask you out Cass."  
"Cass?" he smiled warmly "I like you calling me Cass. So, how about now that we both know we like each other … is there a chance?"  
"Would you like to go out with me this weekend?" asked Dean.  
"I would like that very much Dean. Nobody knows I am gay Dean, not even my family and I would like to keep it like that until I graduate. Will that be a problem?" Asked Cass  
"Well, only my brother Sam knew until now… my father I think he suspects it but I never told him. So I don´t think it would be a problem. We should be able to keep it secret for now. And as for the date … if you give me your phone number we can text, I can pick you up somewhere discreet and we can drive to the city, maybe dinner and a movie?"  
"Sounds wonderful" said Cass beaming with happiness. The were probably sitting way closer than they should but there was nobody else in the field and on the parking lot only Sam was waiting by the car. Dean looked around scanning the surroundings.  
Dean hugged Cass and gave him a peck on the cheek, then he smiled while watching Cass write down his number for him. Cass looked at him like he wasted to kiss him but instead he held his hand and softly caressed his knuckles with his thumb.  
"I will see you this weekend Dean" Cass left his hand and Dean immediately felt the loss. He smiled at Cass that waived bye while heading into the parking lot and getting on his car.  
Dean moved finally towards the Impala where Sam was waiting, Sam cheered him loudly! And Dean blushed and embarrassed thanked his brother for the little push.  
"I got a date this weekend!" he said  
"Are you going to tell dad?" Sam asked a little frightened.  
"Not that the date is with a man" he said "Cass wants to keep it secret until high school is over. I kind of agree."  
"That will save you lots of problems" said Sam "at least once you leave for college, Dad will have no say on who you date" Sam supported him but he knew his father would never.  
"He will cut me out from here, he would never let me see you again" said Dean  
"Hey! Do you think I would allow such thing?" said Sam annoyed "Give me a little credit would you?"  
"I know I know… I just don’t want to make this more difficult than already is, and I don´t want to give dad more excuses to drink himself silly."  
"Yeah … like he needs more of those" Sam whispered. Dean put a hand of his shoulder reassuringly  
"One day you will get out to college too and then we both will get to be whatever we fucking feel like to be" said Dean.  
"Hell yeah!" Sam turned the music louder and both brother headed home singing to Metallica.  
When Castiel got home, like always there was a crazy amount of action in the house. He was the younger of 5 siblings. Michael, Lucifer, Gabriel, Hannah, Annael and him, barely 15 months apart from each other. They all worked in the family business, they had a chain of supermarkets, each sibling either run a branch or a service but no matter what, they all still lived in town and spend the time in the parents house. His parents Naomi and Chuck were nice, they were loving parents, a little pushy with their smothering love but they meant well. Castiel had two major concerns right now, one getting a scholarship to go to college and study arts like it had always been his dream because his parents were already talking about sending him to college in town to business school so he will also join the family sect of supermarkets and boring life. He needed the scholarship to pay for it or he would be chained into that life he definitely didn´t want for himself. And the other problem … well he had amazing green eyes and was a man. If only he had been born hetero but no, he had to be gay and now he had agreed to go on an actual date with Dean Winchester! He had no idea how his parents would react if he ever decided to come out to them. They were very religious but they loved him… would they kick him out like he had heard other parents do? He was terrified.  
To Cass from Dean 19:27 “Hey Cass, it´s Dean. I was wondering if we can meet on Saturday afternoon around 4ish?”  
To Dean from Cass 19:28 “Sure thing. Can we meet where we met today?”  
To Cass from Dean 19:30 “I will be there, Saturday at 4. What time is your curfew?”  
To Dean from Cass 19:32 “I will tell my parents that I go to a friend´s house, I would have to be home by 10”  
To Cass from Dean 19:34 “Alright, I will get you home in time, I promise. Looking forward to Saturday”  
To Dean from Cass 19:34 “Counting the hours until I see you again”

Castiel lied in bed holding his phone with a stupid smile on his lips, remembering how nice it felt that peck on his cheek and Dean´s arms around him. He was hoping he would see him around the corridors on his way to class tomorrow of heading to his training. The team had intensive training because they had a game on Sunday night. He loved to see Dean with his football uniform, he was so beautiful. His sister Hannah called him downstairs for dinner. The house was full like always, all the siblings and Michael´s wife were there.  
Food was nice, the talk on the table was nice and respectful, Cass was happy because they had avoided the topic of Castiel´s future in the company tonight. He joined them for a cup of tea in the living room where they were sitting down and the TV was on. The news started a coverage about gay rights and Michael snorted.  
"They might own the show business because they have lots of time on air for the dam gay rights crap lately" he said. Cass froze, his dad turned the TV off annoyed.  
"One cannot just sit in his own house without letting that garbage into his living room" he said sitting back again "by the way, it is not just in California and New York, Marcus the delivery guy, he found his son with another man last week."  
"Oh my lord!" said Naomi "What did he do?"  
"He was devastated, he told me he had his suspicions but that he never thought his own son would act on those low instincts" Chuck said "he told him that under his roof that was not allowed. If he insisted on that depravation, he needed to leave."  
"I know James" said Castiel "he is younger than me…he is only fifteen" he was shaking now "did he kick him out?"  
"No he didn´t, he gave him a choice, the ungrateful bastard left the house. That was 5 days ago, he hasn´t heard from him" Chuck said "it is terrible."  
"Something could have happened to him" Cass said "did he call the police?"  
"For what? To spread his shame all over the neighborhood? He has gone through enough already"  
"But James?" Castiel could not understand how his family was all cool with the idea of a minor wandering alone in the streets "he is only fifteen…"  
"Nothing Castiel, he deserves what he has gotten into. Fifteen years old and holding hands with another boy… what was he thinking …" Castiel felt a tear roll down his cheek, he had held Dean´s hand on the park. He drank his tea in silence and dried his tears.  
"Life is difficult son" Naomi said "I am sorry you have to learn this lessons of life this soon. You should go to bed, you have school tomorrow."  
"Yes mother" said Cass excusing himself.

He had a terrible night of sleep. On Friday he went to class and everything was incredibly normal. He didn´t see James in the corridors. He didn´t recall seeing him in the last few days. Was he really wandering along the city alone? Did he had somebody to go to? Or maybe he was sleeping under a bridge somewhere. He felt a pinch in his stomach. James could be him, or Dean. He shivered with fear. He saw Sam in class but no Dean during Friday.  
Saturday came soon but the hours moved slowly, he told his mother that he was going to study and go to the river with some friends. He had an impeccable reputation with his parents so they trusted them, no reason to suspect he was lying though his teeth. He met Dean in the field. When he got there, the only car parked on the lot was Dean´s black Impala, he saw him standing by the driver´s door. Dean moved around to open the door for Cass and he lingered his hand over Castiel´s on a soft touch telling him he was happy to see him. He stepped into the car and drove to the city. They talked about class, high school, the future, Castiel told him about James and his family´s conversation. Dean understood Cass´s fears, he told him about his father and his blasting homophobia since he came back from the war. They got to the city, and Dean parked the car on a burger joint.  
"This place is special, a friend of mine works here, he is like a father to me. I know he knows about me, I didn’t even had to say anything. He has my back" said Dean opening the door to Cass and offering his hand. Cass took it.  
"Are you sure we will be safe there?" he asked a little afraid but he looked into Dean´s green eyes and he felt safe.  
"Trust me. We will enjoy the burgers on a discreet location" he smiled.  
"Hey Dean!" said the bearded man when they entered "and you must be Cass, I am Bobby" he held his hand out to Cass, he shook it happily "follow me to the VIP section."  
"Thanks Bobby" said Dean.  
"No worries son" Bobby palmed Dean´s back "I understand your concerns. I am glad the weather is so amazing". When Bobby opened the door, Cass saw a narrow set of stairs going up. He glanced at Dean wondering but Dean was already going up the stairs and dragging him along. Castiel realized he was still holding Dean´s hand. He smiled. He liked that.  
When Dean opened the door, he saw what Bobby meant by VIP area. There was a little table, with two chairs and a candle on the roof next to the vent and the fire escape. Dean looked at Cass wondering if that was too crappy.  
"This is wonderful Dean" Cass said.  
"I am glad it is not too crappy for a date" Dean moved the chair for Cass and then he seated himself.  
"I think it is quite romantic" Castiel blushed a little and Dean caressed his red and warm cheeks with his hand. Cass leaned on the touch. They looked into each other´s eyes and smiled. This feeling in his gut was good, not bad, it was warm and nice, Cass felt on cloud nine.  
They ate burgers and talked. Dean cheeked his watch, it was 6:15. They ordered pied for dessert and talked more. Cass held his hand. It was 7:30. Dean moved his chair closer to Cass so he could lay his arm around Cass´s shoulders. 8:20. Cass was looking at him while he was explaining something about his car and Cass laughed and hide his face on Dean´s shoulder. Dean lifted his face from his t-shirt and kissed him softly and chastely on the lips. 8:45. They kept kissing and Cass slipped his tongue over Dean´s lips he took it as an invitation to deepen the kiss. Their tongues danced on their mouths and Cass had his hand´s on Dean´s hair. When they gasped for air, Dean watched his watch, it was already 9.  
"We need to get going if you want to be home by 10. I don´t want to get you in trouble Cass" he said and he kissed him again.  
"Yeah, this is so nice that… you are right" Cass held Dean´s hand when they got down the stairs. Bobby refused to let them pay for the food and invited them over whenever they wanted. Dean opened the door of the Impala for him again and then drove them back to town. When they arrived to the field parking lot it was 9:50. Cass knew he needed the time for the walk back but still he decided to steal another kiss from Dean. This one felt different, more heated. Cass trapped Dean between his body and the car, his hands were on Dean´s hips and he kissed him wildly. Dean´s hands were roaming over his body, holding his head, into his hair and down his back until he felt them with a ghost touch over his ass. Cass let a little moan scape when he pulled of the kiss and he felt himself blush like crazy.  
"Please text me once you get home safe" asked Dean  
"I will. I loved the date Dean. Could we do this again?" he asked  
"I would love that- Dean gave him a peck on the lips" go it is getting late.  
"Goodnight Dean"  
"Goodnight Cass"

Dean got into the car and drove home. He hated the idea of Castiel walking back home alone in the dark, but he knew that despite his gut feeling, that walk was to keep him safe.  
He parked the car on the front door and saw the lights on in the living room. He looked at the watch, it was 10 o´clock. He got in and saw Sam sitting on the crappy couch reading a book.  
"He is out on patrol" he said "something happened, they were all called out"  
"Good that he is no there" said Dean  
"How was the date?" Sam asked closing the book  
"Amazing, Cass is amazing" said Dean with a stupidly happy face.  
"Wow I have never seen you like this before!" said Sam.  
"You will have to be careful, they are things happening in this town to people like you and Cass. Did you hear about James?" Sam asked  
"Yeah, Cass told me. He was very shaken about that. We will be careful I promise…" His sentence was interrupted by his phone blipping. A text!  
From Cass to Dean 10:15 “Safe and punctual back home. No problems. I am already in bed”  
From Dean to Cass 10:16 “Sweet dreams beautiful”  
From Cass to Dean 10:16 “Sweet dream Dean”

"Is everything alright?" asked Sam looking at the phone  
"Cass got home alright. No issues. I am relieved, I didn´t like to let him walk back home by himself but I had no choice" he told Sam and he understood.  
"The guy James was caught with, his name is Joe. He is missing too" Sam said.  
"What?" Dean considered the possibilities "did they left together? Or…"  
"I heard dad talking with Carl about that, the mother didn´t kick him out, it seems he never made it back from school today. It looks bad."  
"What are you saying Sam …"- Dean wondered but he feared the answer  
"Dad and Carl and the others were called out to patrol by the woods, someone had seen something…"  
"Fuck!" Dean shivered with fear. What the fuck was going on with these people "We should get to bed, I don´t want dad to come over pissed and find us here to be the perfect excuse to pay it with us."  
"Yeah you are right" he said.

When Sam woke up on Sunday, the newspaper was over the kitchen counter. The headlines said “Teenager found dead on the woods” Sam read it and ran upstairs to Dean. When he woke up and calmed Sam down he took the newspaper and read it. Joseph Keller, his body was found on the woods, he was beaten and killed.  
"Fuck I need to talk to Cass, I need you to fabricate me a good excuse Sam" Dean begged.  
Sam went to Castiel´s house and asked him for help with some book for their science project. Cass casually followed Sam´s lie like he had seen it coming and then Sam had asked Castiel´s sister Annael if she wanted to go to the movies next weekend. Annael agreed and blushed. Naomi felt very happy, Sam Winchester was a good kid, son of a cop and brilliant student according to Castiel. He would be a good husband for Annael.  
Sam told nothing to Cass on their way to his house. Every time someone crossed them on the street Sam asked Cass more things about his sister, the conversation was loud enough. Cass was worried that something had happened to Dean. Once they got into the house and into the kitchen, he saw Dean. He was sitting in the kitchen with the newspaper and he seemed very worried.  
"Oh Cass" He said Standing up a moving towards him to hold him on a hug "you need to see this. We need to talk."  
"I will leave you both. We don´t have long." said Sam going upstairs.  
"Show me what?" Dean showed him the newspaper and Cass let a little cry escape his throat "Oh my god! Joe… they killed Joe! Oh god!" Cass was shaking, Dean hugged him again "He was just holding hands with James when his father saw them… this is …"  
"This is fucked Cass, is they did that to Joe … who knows where James is… what do you think they would do to us. I am putting you in high danger Cass."  
"Are you braking up with me? We didn´t even get to have a second date…" he whispered  
"No, no no, listen to me. I am not breaking up with you. But I needed you to see how dangerous this is getting. So we need to keep a low profile, even lower. No kisses in public whatsoever, or holding hands… I am so sorry Cass" Dean Lowered his head in shame "I wish I could give you anything, I wish I could show everyone how I feel about you…."  
"Dean … tell me, show me" Cass begged. And Dean, he cupped Cass´s face with his hand and kissed him softly and slow.  
"I would die before anything happens to you babe" Dean said  
"Kiss me again Dean" Cass asked while moving from his chair into Dean´s lap. Dean flinched in surprise but smiled into the kiss.  
"I am not breaking up with you Cass, ever" Dean held Cass´s waist with his arms. Castiel´s arms were around his neck and they were both kissing when Sam politely interrupted.  
"We need to get going" Sam said looking at the floor because he felt like he had intruded on a very intimate moment.

Dean had to let Cass go without knowing when he would be able to hold or kiss him like this again. He promised to think about him all the time in a last whisper and let him go. Cass was almost at the door when he came back to the kitchen and kissed Dean, with an open mouth sloppy desperate kiss "I love you Dean" he whispered on his ear leaving him there frozen with tears on his eyes.


	2. Blood bath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A killer is on the loose. Cass and Dean are more in love each day, that puts them in danger, they are careful but...

It had been two months since the day Joseph’s body had been found. Two months of Dean and Cass finding each other in dark corners and unsuspected locations to steal 5 minutes for themselves. A kiss or two hidden here and there. Finally one weekend, Dean had arranged a free Saturday afternoon for him and Cass, they met in the school parking lot and drove to the city together. They went to the burger joint where Bobby had arranged the VIP room for them. So again Dean and Cass sat on that roof, feeling safe and having plenty of time to finally kiss each other until exhaustion. They barely touched the food because they were so afraid of wasting a minute and not having another moment like this for themselves in a long time… that they just wasted the minimum time breathing.  
Castiel felt in heaven, Dean’s lips were so soft, so full, so beautiful … all Dean was perfect, the way he held him close to his heart, how soft and loving he was around Cass, How much he cared for him and his wellbeing. It was unfortunate that they had to hide to be together like this but, on the other side, the impossibility of touching and kissing each other had lead them to talk, get to know one another after the million hours of chat and Skype. Dean had volunteered at the dog shelter too as another excuse to spend time with Cass, he was starting within the next week. Dean was in his mind day and night, he had never been so happy and so worried.  
Cass was now sitting on Dean’s lap sideways, they were kissing, arms around each other roaming, touching. The position became uncomfortable after a while, Cass moved and Dean indicated him to sit on his lap but straddling him. Cass complied and indeed it was a much comfortable position and he could feel Dean’s full dick underneath him. Castiel was hard himself and had absolutely no experience about what he should do about this. Dean kissed his neck and undid a couple of buttons of his shirt to kiss and lick at his shoulder; Cass moved forward dragging his erection over Dean’s involuntarily, Dean moaned at the friction. They both froze.  
"Sorry Dean" Cass said nervously "I didn’t mean to touch you that way…"  
"Cass, you can touch me anyway you want babe" said Dean on a whisper  
"Dean…" moaned Cass moving again while kissing Dean "I don’t know what I am doing here…"  
"Does it feel good Cass?" asked Dean and Cass moved his head enthusiastically "then forget about everything else and lets go with what feels good." Dean moved against Cass and their erections rocked into each other, both man swallowed a moan.  
"Oh god Dean … please touch me Dean, please…" asked Cass moaning in his lap. Dean was blushed and his skin felt on fire. He fumbled with Cass’s belt and undid his pants and zipper releasing his hard cock. Castiel had his face hidden in Dean’s shoulder.  
"Look at me Cass" he begged. After a moment his boyfriend looked at him with those amazing blue yes while Dean took his cock on his hand. Hard and thick and started to give him a nice hand job. He locked his eyes on Cass and told him how good that felt "oh Cass babe, you feel so good. I never imagined I would get to touch you like this. Look at me Cass, don’t close your eyes, I know you are close, cum for me Cass, cum on my hand." Castiel’s face ruptured on a silent moan when Dean felt the warmth of his cum spill on his hand and t-shirt. Cass collapsed on his arms.  
"I have never been touched like that Dean" confessed Cass "it feels nothing like that when I do it …"  
"I have never done this to anyone ever Cass. You looked so perfect on my lap, I loved the feeling of pleasuring you" Dean confessed too.  
"I would like to touch you too" said Cass blushing hard  
"I am sorry babe, I cummed on my pants while I had you on my lap. I will have to be another time" Dean smiled a little ashamed of the lack of stamina  
"Did I turned you on that much?" asked Cass while kissing him "I can’t believe I tuned on the football captain so much that he came on his pants because of me…" Cass smiled proud  
"Don’t be so cocky …" Said Dean getting serious and then his façade fell immediately "who am I lying to?. I cummed on my pants like a horny teen because I find you so irresistible and I had you on my lap, I had you on my hand, your hot, thick perfect cock was on my hand Cass … so yes, you tuned me on so dam much that I spilled all over my underwear and now I feel quite gross." Cass kissed him and laughed at the conversation "I need to make a pit stop on the bathroom. Then we need to go back to get in time downtown"  
"Are we going to fake the encounter and get Sam and Annael?" asked Cass  
"Yeah, that is the plan, I am not letting you walk back home by yourself at night. We need an excuse, Sam and Annael’s date will be it" Said Dean going downstairs.

Dean had arranged to pick Sam and Annael and bring them back home. Cass texted Annael asking if it was possible to get a ride back home from the library with her and her boyfriend, he suggested Sam to ask Dean. Sam texted Dean´s phone number to Castiel so he and his brother could arrange a meeting and Dean would drive them all back home. It seemed innocent enough. Sam didn´t like to hide things to Annael but Cass had been very adamant to keep her out of his secret for her own good. They were driving home, having fun with Sam and Dean telling them adventures from when they were little until driving along the training field, Dean saw his father´s patrol car parked with the lights on. He stopped to see what was going on.  
"Three patrol cars? Dean stop please something happened" said Sam non quite daring to suggest that their dad could be injured.  
"Yes, this is very concerning" said Dean stopping the car and unbuckling his belt. He turned around and told Cass to stay in the car, he talked in plural but his eyes were locked on Cass.  
"I am going with you" said Sam following his brother. The other policeman saw them but they knew their dad so when they asked for him they pointed to a group of people in the field.  
"What the fuck is going on here?" wondered Dean "what are they doing in the field by the goalpost. Dad? Are you alright?"  
"Dean?" said John Winchester turning around surprised to hear hi son´s voice "Sam? What are you boys doing here?"  
"I was driving Sam and his girl from the city when we saw your car … why are you all in the field?" asked Dean  
"We found the other boy …" said John very tense "somebody called saying that there was a body hanging from the goalpost in the field, when we got here we thought he hanged himself but when we got closer …"  
"What?" asked Sam looking now towards the goalpost and seeing a body covered with a white sheet.  
"His body is covered in cuts and scars …" said John "the word fag is carved in his body several times."  
"Fuck.." said Dean stepping back and feeling a wave of panic  
"Yeah this is really messed up" said John "the person who tortured him probably had him for weeks according to the scar tissue."  
"He was even younger than me" whispered Sam in shock  
"Dean let´s get away from the body" suggested John when looking at Sam and how affected he was. The three of them walked towards the impala and Dean was so freaked out that he didn´t realize Cass was on the car, when they approached it, both Cass and Annael were standing by the driver´s door.  
"Dad" said Sam with pleading voice "this are my girlfriend and his younger brother who is in class with me, please be nice…"  
"I am always nice" said John  
"Please don´t interrogate them, you will freak them out" begged Sam. Dean stayed quiet. He saw Castiel tense considerably when he realized he was going to meet his dad.  
"Is everything alright?" asked Annael  
"No I am afraid not … do you know who James Milton is?" asked Sam, both siblings nodded "they found his body."  
"Oh no!" said Anna running into Sam´s arms and started to cry.  
"He was just younger than me" said Cass resting his back on the car and looking at Dean with panic in his eyes. Dean wanted to hug him so much but it was impossible. So he just put a hand on his shoulder, keeping as much distance as possible.  
"I think I should drive the Novaks home dad, and then Sam and I will go straight home. It is not safe to be out with crazy people killing kids around town" Dean said trying to get away from his dad.  
"You know what I think about fags son…" John made a pause looking at Dean and then at Cass trying to make a point "but it is definitely not safe out there. Anyone capable of that level of torture is sick, we have a soulless killer in town. It will be better if you refrain yourselves from going out this late. No wandering around town alone! Did you hear me!" asked John "that goes for all of you."  
"Yes sir" said Sam with Annael still sobbing in his arms.  
"Drive them home, we will talk once I am back" said John and Dean agreed while he felt a lump of fear in his stomach. He opened the door for Annael and Cass and when John turned around to go back to the field, Cass held his hand reassuringly. 

The drive home was silent. Sam actually seated in the back with Annael and Cass sat shotgun. That allowed them to hold hands on the drive home without risking Annael to see. Cass was on the brink of tears, he was afraid but he held Dean´s hand with more passion and caressed his knuckles with his thumb reassuringly.  
Sam and Annael walked towards the door and Cass stayed behind in the car with Dean giving them a minute.  
"My dad suspects about us" said Dean letting his worries out  
"I realized that, that look he gave us…" said Cass "I am sorry if I did something that made it too obvious."  
"Not your fault Cass. No matter what happens tonight when he comes back home. You need to know that I love you and that I would do anything within my power to keep you safe" Dean held his hand again.  
"I love you Dean, please don´t leave me" Begged Cass holding his hand tightly "no matter what we will figure it out together."  
"We need to get out the car" said Dean. They got out of the car and Dean joked on Sam "ok lovebirds we gave you enough time for the goodnight kiss, you two need to get in."  
"Dean!" said Sam annoyed and blushing.  
"No no Dean me!" said Dean imitating Sam´s annoying tone "if I could kiss the person I love goodnight, well… that will be one hell of a kiss. No wasting a minute!" he said looking at Cass who was just behind Sam. Cass´s eyes formed tears but he blinked and looked again containing them. Dean broke his smile a little.  
"What is all this noise at the front door" said Naomi opening the door on them on mid conversation. Annael was almost too close to Sam and they both stepped back creating more distance.  
"We were saying goodbye to the Winchesters" said Annael.  
"Thank you for driving them back Dean" said Naomi "I feel more at ease knowing that an older and responsible boy like you drove them back from the city, thanks for giving Castiel a lift too."  
"No problem m´am, Sam texted me and I was in the city with some friends so it was no problem to pick up Castiel too and drive them all back" said Dean politely "it is not safe for anyone to wander out there alone. My father told us that they found the Milton kid, dead tonight."  
"Oh dear!" Naomi covered her mouth with her hand "do they know what happened?"  
"Murdered is all he told us for now. I guess they will know more tomorrow" said Sam "We need to get back home. Our dad was very clear about not staying out too late. A killer is on the loose."  
"You are right boy" said Naomi "you both get home safe, thanks for bringing my babies safe home too."  
"Bye Annael, Castiel! Goodnight M´am" said Dean walking towards the car. He heard Sam said goodbye and follow him into the car.


	3. Hate

Dean was excited to start volunteering at the dog shelter, god he loved dogs so much. He used to beg his father to have one when he was growing up, John has always said no. When Sam started ask for one he had for an instant his hopes up, in the end, Sam always had better chances of getting what he wanted out of their father but again John had said no. It was his free time, it will make his gain point for the University applications but nonetheless John had been quite annoyed by Dean´s idea to volunteer in the shelter and he has adamantly stated that volunteering in the police office would have put his at use instead of wasting his time walking those “smelly 4 legged balls of fleas”. But Dean was having none of that and Sam backed him up, first he Knew how much his brother loved dogs, second he was not letting his father boss Dean around in the police office and third, well Cass was going to be there and Dean was completely in love with him and they deserved to spend some time together. So Sam had been a buffer in the discussion and Dean got his volunteering time in the shelter starting today!  
When he got there, the first thing he saw was Cass playing with a very nice German Sheppard, He walked into the office and the woman there pointed out that Cass was going to be showing him around and appointing the tasks due to his broad experience with them. Dean smiled and nodded, this was working even better than expected.  
"Hey Cass" said Dean once he got into the big kennel "the manager told me that you are my boss now" winked at Cass and smiled warmly  
"Is that so?" Cass replied "I must take advantage them"  
"That sounds promising, so what do we need to do now?"  
"Well I did most of the cleaning myself, I thought you wouldn´t deserve that in your first day, so the only missing thing is taking some of the dogs for a walk and them feed them all!"  
"Do we get to walk them? Where?" asked Dean  
"We take them to the park through the trail" said Cass pointing at the Fernwell Park by the river  
"I always wanted to take you there, walk along the river holding your hand Cass" said Dean turning a little red  
"That is very sweet Dean" said Cass casually touching his hand "I am going to love having you around here."  
"I am loving this too" Said Dean completely happy  
"Let´s go them, we will take the bigger ones today, I will get three and you will get one" said Cass  
"One?" asked Dean concerned.  
"Trust me, Wally will need a man for himself. I never take him out with the others, always by himself, he has too much energy!" Dean understood when he saw the humongous Mastiff running towards Cass. Dean almost flinched back "He is very sweet but he thinks he is a lapdog" Dean laughed loudly.  
They got the collars and leashes, Cass managed three overly excited dogs to walk by his side quite peacefully, while Dean tried not to be dragged across the forest by Wally. He had a smile on his face all the time. Once on the park, there was a fenced dogpark where they let them play for half an hour. Dean and Cass sat down on a bench, there was nobody else there except for them and the 4 happy dogs. They threw the ball around a little but otherwise they sat there, holding hands and talking. Like a normal couple. When Dean got home that night he was so happy he felt floating.  
Didn´t last. When he got home, Sam was waiting for him at the front door.  
"He is waiting for you Dean" said Sam, it was obvious that he was concerned "I don´t think is a good idea that you get in there …"  
"What do you want me to do?" asked Dean "I think he has been holding on this since the night he met Cass …. He knows … I know he knows he looks at me different."  
"I know" Said Sam considering the possibilities. They could run …  
"Whatever happens, don´t come inside until is over, please Sam." asked Dean  
"I am not letting you in there by yourself, forget it!" he argued  
"I don´t want you to see how he humiliates me Sam, he is going to say terrible things… I don´t want you to see this… please?" Asked Dean. He looked at Sam and saw the fear in his eyes "It is going to be alright."  
"I will be here … but if things get too bad I am going in! No arguments!" said Sam  
"Alright alright, thanks Sam" said Dean hugging his brother tightly before entering the house. His father was sitting in the kitchen nursing a beer.  
"Dean?" John called "come here please!"  
"Yes dad, Is everything alright?" asked Dean  
"You didn´t tell me that you were volunteering at the shelter with Castiel Novak…"- John said  
"He has been volunteering there for years" said Dean offering the fewer info the better. "I stopped by the park on my daily patrol, I saw you both with the dogs" said his father making it clear that he knew "I never thought I would have to ask you this Dean. Are you fooling around with that Novak boy?"  
"He …" Dean was panicking "we are… together dad" he said "I am gay" Dean exhaled that truth and remained silent.  
"I know" said John, making Dean look at him in awe "I have known for a while"  
"How?" mumbled Dean  
"Don´t you think I wouldn´t notice, all those cheerleaders you date … I could see it in your eyes, no interest no spark whatsoever. I never thought you would act upon these feeling though. The night we found the second boy dead, you showed up with that boy … I saw it in your eyes Dean."  
"I am sorry to disappoint you dad" said Dean and he meant it. He was really sorry that he would never get to be what his dad wanted.  
"Dam right I am disappointed. First I thought I was clear about what I thought about this!" John raise his voiced now "but on top of that, I thought that being a cop´s son would give you more common sense! You are sick Dean, this is not natural, not normal at all … I never thought you would act on these desires of yours"  
"I love him dad" he said  
"I don´t fucking care Dean! People is getting killed Dean for the same thing Don´t you have any common sense? You are risking your life and this kid´s life too!" John said angrily. At least he could try to frighten Dean a little and maybe, only maybe he would stop this nonsense.  
"I know dad, we are being careful…" Dean tried to explain but his father cut him  
"The hell you are, if I could see it, anybody could see it. You are a shame Dean, if it wasn´t for the fact that there is a killer in the loose I would kick you out of my house right the fuck now!" Dean shrank a little at the screams  
"You are not … kicking me out?" asked Dean reluctantly, he was about to cry but he tried to hold the tears in, he hated to be seen as week.  
"If I kick you out now, the word would spread and you will be a dead man, I would be placing a target on your back. You are my son, Dean. I want to help you not get you killed." John relaxed a little when he saw his son spilling tears silently "you need to end things with that boy, you will get him killed too."  
"I can´t, I love him dad" Dean confessed "I have never loved anybody like this."  
"Fuck Dean, he is a man. This is insane, I need another beer" John stated but before opening the fridge he turned back to Dean again "there are rules in this house, that boy doesn´t get one foot inside my property or I would shoot him myself, no outings in public Dean it is too risky. You are graduating in three months, I would sign on any university application you want far from here. If you insist on indulging those feelings, then once you go for University I would ask you not to come back and not to contact Sam" John said slowly  
"I will go dad and never come back, but never contacting Sam? I can´t promise you that" said Dean  
"I don´t want weird ideas on his mind" said John  
"Dad he has known for years, this is not contagious. I was born like this, Sam is straight, he has always been" Dean said.  
"I will consider it" Said John "now both of you go to bed, tomorrow is a schoolday."  
"Yes sir" said Dean leaving the kitchen and getting Sam to go upstairs with him.  
"I heard it all Dean" said Sam hugging his brother once they got upstairs to their room  
"I assume that much of my nosy little brother" said Dean sadly  
"I don´t care what dad says, you will never loose me" said Sam hugging him even tighter "at least he didn´t kick you out. I was so afraid."  
"I am alright Sam, a little tired, let go to sleep please" They got ready for bed and tried to catch some sleep, Sam woke up with a little noise hours later. He opened his eyes and realized that the noise were sobs coming from his brother.

Dean had waited until he realized Sam was sleep and he left himself feel. All the tears he had held ran down his face in the darkness of his room. He cried because he hated the way his father looked at him, how much he despised his despite of all the effort Dean has always devoted to be his perfect little soldier. He always loved Sam more. And that was alright because Sam was awesome but he wished at least the old man didn´t hate him. He cried thinking about his mom and how much he wished she was still alive. He cried because he was afraid his dad was right and he was going to get Cass killed and he cried because he loved Castiel so much and he hated himself just as much. So he cried and cried until he had no more tears to spill.  
Sam woke up from his bead and walked the few steps between his bed and Dean´s only to hop under the cover with his brother and hug him, he cradled his big broken brother in his arms and told him that everything was going to be alright. Dean finally stopped crying and fell asleep in his brother´s arms.


	4. He needs you

Dean didn´t go to class the next day, he didn´t go to the shelter either. He didn´t answer Cass´ texts or phone calls. Castiel feeling that something was seriously wrong asked Sam about it and Sam said the three words “He needs you” and gave him directions to the cemetery.  
When Cass found him he was curled into a ball next to his mother´s grave, he had cried himself to exhaustion. Cass embraced him and lied down there with him, he whispered how much he loved him and that everything was going to be alright. He gave him pepper kisses all over his face and head and he held him tight until Dean started to talk.  
"She was wonderful Cass, she was the best mom ever" his voice was raw and broken "she used to sing me to sleep, read me stories at bedtime. I was barely a toddler when Sam was born and I was so happy, to get to be a big brother and take care of him. She always said that Sam was lucky because he got me taking care of him, being a big brother was a very important task, so when she died I continued to take care of him, despite my dad… he ..he changed when she died, he went angry, dry … he stopped loving me."  
"Dean …" Cass didn´t know what to do but be there for him  
"He asked me about us yesterday …" Castiel´s blood froze for a moment "he wants me to leave as soon as I get into an University and never come back… he said I can stay until then because he doesn´t want me to die … but he doesn´t love me so why does he care if I die Cass? Why doesn´t he love me?" Dean started crying again.  
"I don´t know Dean, you are smart, caring, funny, responsible … I don´t see anything that I don´t love. I don´t know why your dad is like he is … maybe he is so broken after losing your mom that he doesn´t know how to love anymore… I am so sorry babe" Cass kissed him again.  
"I love you Cass" said Dean hugging him back  
"I love you too" said Cass "I am going away with you Dean" that made Dean look up at Cass "when you are getting to university, I will move with you, wherever you go, I ´ll go"  
"But your family and school??" Dean asked.  
"I hate the family business and I never intended to get into it. I want to be a vet. So I will get my degree wherever we move and then will join the University too. We will live together. My family would never approve of my sexuality, they will let me go."  
"They will send the cops after us, they will send my dad…" said Dean  
"No they won´t I will take care of that. I will leave without fuss, we will be together. Once Sam graduates he will be free to visit us anytime" Cass said.  
"I need you" said Dean  
"I know Dean, I need you too" Dean and Cass were sat in front of Mary´s grave in silence.  
"She died on a fire … I hate fire so much, I frightens me" confessed Dean "even a small one will make me panic."  
"Confessing your biggest fear?, well, my turn then. My biggest fear is losing you Dean" Cass held his hand.  
"I know we are young but I want to spend with you the rest of my life" confessed Dean smiling to Cass now, he saw him smile widely at the statement.  
"Thank you for today Cass, you are the love of my life. I don´t like to feel week like this so I bottle everything inside, but somehow I don´t care you see me for myself."  
"No covers" Cass caressed his cheek "I like it."  
"Yeah, me too" Dean kissed Cass "Do you have to go home?"  
"Not in some hours" Cass said "Why?"  
"Let´s go for a drive" Dean stood up and offered Cass a hand.  
"I like that" Castiel took Dean´s hand and they jumped in the Impala and left town through secondary roads until they go to the outlook. On a Wednesday in the middle of the morning, there was nobody there, not that the place was very popular anyways. Dean invited Cass to follow him through a narrow path down the hill from the outlook until they got to a clear meadow with a cottage.  
"This place belonged to my grandpa on my mom´s side. She used to take me here, she used it as a studio, she loved to paint and she was really good. So meanwhile she painted I could sit in the meadow and play with my trucks and cars. I remember this, not very clear but I do remember how happy this place made us" Dean was lovingly holding his hand. Castiel´s eyes were on Dean full of understanding and love.  
"It is beautiful Dean" whispered Cass a little breath taken with the views  
"I will show you" Dean said walking towards the house. He took out the set of keys, there were only three, the impala, their home and another old rusty key, that belonged to the front door of the cottage "My father hadn´t come back here since she died. I do the maintenance and honestly sometimes I came here… if feels like her. What do you think?" asked once they crossed the door frame  
"Wow Dean this place is beautiful!" said Cass in awe. When entering the little livingroom with the big windows he saw some paintings halfway done. There were finished paintings by the walls. Landscapes mostly, very good "she was very good".  
"Do you want to see my favorite?" asked Dean and Cass nodded enthusiastically "this one" Dean got a small one and showed it to Cass. There was the meadow, a little boy with fair hair and freckles was sitting under a tree playing with a big truck full of pine-cones, and there was so much love and detail in that painting that Cass felt his heart swell.  
"It is you Dean!" he said on a whisper  
"Yeah" Dean hugged him from the back while still staring at the frame "Thanks for being here for me Cass, I love you."  
"I love you too Dean" Cass said turning around in his arms to kiss him.

Dean let Cass control the kiss, it was loving and passionate. Castiel´s hands were on his waist, slowly moving underneath the hem of his t-shirt so they could feel the warmth of his skin. Dean hummed in the kiss and entangled his hands on Cass´s hair deepening the kiss and opening up to let Castiel in. Their tongues entangled in their mouths, savoring each other. Dean let his hips brush on Castiel´s letting the kiss get more heated and when this bulges brushed though their jeans, both felt a rush of wanton and pleasure that made them moan and break their kiss.  
"Dean …" Cass whispered while he was blushing "is there a bed on this cottage?"  
"Yes Cass…" answered Dean with another surprised "yes"  
"Show me" Cass asked him and Dean felt like a fish out of the water, gasping to breath but finding no air. He took Cass´s hand and walked down the corridor until the bedroom. He opened the door and showed Cass a lovely but simple cottage bedroom with a queen-size bed. Cass dragged Dean towards the bed, moved the comforter slowly, because the house had been locked for a while and nobody had cleaned in there in months so everything was full of dust. Once he felt like it was good enough, he sat down on the bed a looked at Dean that was standing there like a marble statue frozen and breathing heavily with anticipation "c´mere Dean" said Cass with a crocked smile.  
Dean got close to Cass and crawled in the bed on top of him stranding him, He kissed Cass again while rocking their hips together getting the friction they were both craving. Cass stopped him.  
"Dean please stop" Dean froze over Cass and immediately looked at him "If you continue to do this, I will come in my pants and that is now what I want."  
"What do you want Cass?" Asked Dean out of air  
"For starters I would like to see you completely naked" he said bravely. Dean kissed him and then tugged his t-shirt over his head  
"One condition" asked Dean and Cass nodded "I need you naked too, Clothes off Cass." Dean let Cass take his button up shirt off and slowly unbuckled his own jeans and let them fall down his legs, he could feel Castiel´s eyes on him, exploring every millimeter, then Dean took of his boxers and he stood there completely naked in front of Cass for the first time. Castiel decided to follow suit unbuckling his jeans but Dean stopped his hands and took over the task. Sensually and slowly he pulled down his jeans, took of his shoes and socks, got each leg of the jeans out while kissing his legs and knees slowly, he then looked at Cass asking for consent while he touched the elastic of his boxers, Cass nodded, he was blushed red like a tomato. Dean took off his underwear and saw Castiel´s thick and firm cock standing proudly in front of him. He slowly let the boxers out of his legs and coming back upwards took Castiel´s manhood in his mouth. Cass screamed with the unexpected feeling and the pleasure.  
"Oh god Dean!!!!!" said Cass between moans of pleasure "oh god you look so incredible with my dick on your mouth babe! Oh please please stop babe or I am going to cum on your mouth Dean."  
"Hey babe, relax, I got plans for you and me coming" said Dean smiling. He kissed Cass letting him with a taste of himself.  
"This feels amazing!" Said Cass "What plans?"  
"We can stop anytime you want… I don´t want to presume but I would like you … you to.." Dean took a deep breath and closed his eyes "I would like to cum with you inside me" Dean opened his eyes to a surprised Castiel  
"Do you really mean it? Would you let me do that?" asked Cass  
"I would really like to feel you inside me Cass, would you?" asked Dean.  
"Yes!" Cass kissed him "of course I would… but I… have never..so I am not so sure about the logistics. We would need lube I think, lots of it."  
"Ah…. I hadn´t planned this so … let me see what I can find" a very naked Dean rushed outside the bedroom and returned after a minute with a little tube "It is Vaseline, this will work."  
"Alright, how do you want to do this? I will need to prepare you a little, can you get on the bed on your hands and knees?"  
"Sure Cass" Dean did and once he felt Cass behind him fumbling with the tube he felt a little too much exposed… but all his questions evaporated the minute he felt Cass´s finger cilcling his hole for the first time and then, he felt the tip breach the ring and enter him.  
"Are you alright?" asked Cass  
"I have fingered myself before, go on I can take this" said Dean. Castiel unsure continued slowly, rocking the finger in and out for a while and then added another one, Dean´s reaction surprised him, he moaned and backed into Cass´s finger getting them in deep  
"Oh god! I can´t believe I am about to…" whispered Cass while adding a third finger and by that time he had Dean moaning an fucking himself on his hand.  
"Please Cass I am ready, please make love to me?" asked Dean.  
So Cass kissed his nape and freckled back and lined himself with Dean´s hole. When Dean felt Cass dick on his opening he held his breath and slowly backed into Cass getting his cock inside smoothly while he moaned loudly. Cass was so taken by the experience that stayed there and saw Dean impaling himself on him. That moan was the filthier thing he had ever hear before. Slowly he rocked his hips feeling how smooth and hot and wonderful it felt to be inside Dean. The pressure, the tightness was unbelievable, he felt that his orgasm was not far so he tried to focus to delay it a bit.  
"Oh god Dean, you feel wonderful babe!" stated between breaths "Are you alright babe?"  
"Don´t stop Cass, I am so close, so close" Dean started to move back to meet Castiel´s thrusts and like that their moans synchronized only accompanied by the dirty sound of the slaps of their bodies rocking together.  
"I am coming Dean!!" Cass announced and almost immediately Dean felt Cass spill inside him with a wild groan. Castiel slowly moved out of Dean and made him turn around. Dean´s cock was hard and red, precome leaking and ready "I am so sorry, I couldn´t make it any longer Dean."  
Castiel moved over Dean and took him on his mouth, Dean´s hands entangled on his hair not to force him to take him all or guide him, but to help Dean realize that this, this was really happening. Cass licked and sucked Dean whole while Dean was losing it completely  
"You need to get out Cass, I am so close now. I am coming right now!" Dean warned but Cass sucked even harder until a couple of seconds later he had dean cumming on his mouth, he swallowed some and cleaned the rest spilling down this chin "this was … I don’t have words to describe it Cass"  
" Hot Dean, this was very hot" Cass kissed him chastely because he was not sure Dean wanted to taste his own come but Dean had none of that and pushed Cass flushed on top of him and introduced his tongue into Cass´s mouth kissing him silly.  
"I cannot believe we just lost our virginity together Cass" said Dean while caressing him- you are my first, I will never have anybody else. Ever. I don´t want anybody else Cass. I love you.  
"I don´t want anybody else wither Dean, I love you too" said Cass kissing him again. Castiel´s phone started ringing and he saw it was his sister. "Oh sorry sis, I got a little distracted and… yes I know, sorry I just realized how late it was now that I saw the phone. I will be there soon. Love you."  
"Did I get you in trouble?" asked Dean  
"Not really, I promised my sis that I will help her with a project and I forgot completely. Can you drive me back home? " asked while stopping to kiss Dean again  
"Sure thing, love."  
They got dressed and Dean drove back to town, parked the car by the park not too far from Cass´s home and urged him to get out quickly. Not later than 20 minutes later, Cass was home safe and sound and Dean parked his car on the front door. He went in and up the stairs to his bedroom. Sam was there listening to music and Dean hoped on his bed with the biggest smile ever. He turned around and let his mind wander to the events of the day. Cass was worth everything. He closed his eyes and felt revisited the feeling of Castiel entering him for the first time, losing his virginity to him had felt so right! His warm thought were interrupted by Sam.  
"What is going on with you?" asked Sam "you have a silly look on your face and you look happy"  
"Yeah, I am happy. I guess you were the one that sent Cass to me?" asked Dean. Sam nodded "thank you."  
"What happened Dean? You look weird, you look different?" asked Sam and Dean blushed smiling like an idiot "oh god!"  
"Sam …" said Dean understanding what his brother was realizing  
"Oh god! You and Cass … did the deed?" asked Sam "He is my age!!! Dean! You took his virginity?" Sam´s face was half annoyed half wondering.  
"Well he took mine too" said Dean a little embarrassed  
"No way!" said Sam jumping from his bed "Big flirt cheerleader womanizer was still a virgin? You had implied several times that you …"  
"Well I am a bid bag of lies. So no I have never slept with anybody, not man and not woman until today. I need to tell you Sam, it felt perfect, felt right! So I am going to give you a valuable piece of advice, wait."  
"To wait?" asked Sam "very original Dean."  
"No listen, wait until you find the right person. It will only feel good if you do it with the right person. Trust me, I know now."said Dean.


	5. Love trumps hate

Before graduation day, there were two more people assaulted, one of them died of the beaten related injuries, her girlfriend moved out of town immediately afterwards despite her injuries. Police still found nothing. Dean knew his father was concerned, he watched his every move with such anger in his eyes. He was graduating, he had two colleges with acceptance letters, he had drawn a plan with Castiel and Sam. He was moving out soon, Cass and him will come out to both families at the same time, it would be a mess but Cass was sure he could play his family to let him go despite being under 21. Sam helped them set up the meeting, it was supposedly be a Sunday lunch at the Novaks now that Sam and Ana´s relationship was getting serious so both families get to know each other. Dean was tense, John was tense and Sam was a wreck, on the other side, Cass was determined.  
When Sunday came, the Novaks prepared to feed the Winchesters and the day started cordially as expected. They were already on the coffee when Cass decided it was time.  
"If you don´t mind I have something I would like to say" said Cass gaining everyone´s attention "I am gay" Castiel paused to examine their faces and let it sink in. He saw confusion in some, surprise in others, horror in some and understanding and love in Dean´s face.  
"What are you talking about son?" asked his father.  
"Well, I am telling you all that I am gay, I have been dating a boy during the last year" said Castiel looking at his father.  
"This is insane" said Michael standing from the table  
"Sit down Michael" said his mother in a deadly tone. He sat down immediately because it didn´t matter how old you were and if you were married, you don´t cross mother when she uses that tone.  
"I have known for a while" said Naomi gaining everyone surprised looks "and I have my suspicions about who this boy is, right Dean?" she asked. Dean stood up and walked towards Castiel putting a hand over his shoulder.  
"You are right" said Dean.  
"Dean!" said John angrily "I thought we had an agreement!"  
"You knew about this?" asked Cass´s father to John  
"Yes, I am a policeman, I know when someone is acting sketchy and hiding something. So I knew Dean had some secret and then one day… I saw hoe he was looking at Castiel and I just knew."  
"And you allowed him to stay in your house! You didn’t kick him out? You did let him sodomize my son? He is young and he doesn´t know what he wants for God´s sake!" he ended up screaming  
"Don´t use the lord´s name in vane Chuck!" said Naomi.  
"First of all, I am young yes, but I have known I was gay for many years now. Second, Dean never acted upon anything until I told him to. And finally I can´t believe you are blaming this on Dean and John" They all stayed silent "John told Dean to go quietly to college and never come back. He is leaving next week, no need of drama."  
"You … are leaving next week?" asked John and for a moment Dean saw some regret?  
"Yes, I gave you my word on that. I have to be there next month for introduction, I will be driving over there so I will have to leave this week, once I get there I still need to find a place to live. The sooner I start looking for places the better" said Dean swallowing a lump in his throat.   
"We organized this meeting not because Sam and Anna but because of us" said Castiel "I will be leaving with Dean"  
"The hell you are!" screamed Michael.  
"Michael I know about your hate for homosexuals, I head you say terrible things and I need to ask one thing" started Castiel "Do you know who is behind the murders?"  
"What?" asked Michael "No! How can you think I would …?" his brother was really surprised, John looked at him curiously  
"John had you on his suspect list, so I needed to know" Michael looked at John with panic  
"I would never!" said Michael "Cass… I can´t believe you think that I am capable of murder…"  
"Well can you imagine, being gay and hearing your own brother say that those that were killed deserved it?" said Cass barely containing the tears. "I can´t stay here. Dean is leaving, I will stay safe with him."  
"You are not going anywhere son!" said Chuck  
"You don’t get it father" said Cass standing up "I am not asking permission, I am telling you how things are going to be. You all are a bunch of homophobes but you are my family and I do not wish you any harm. If I come out publicly, two things will happen, your bigot friends would never do business with you anymore, the stores will go broke. Family business would be over. And then, those killing people out there will come get me." Dean squeezed his hand over Cass´s shoulder to stop him.  
"I am going to California, they are more open minded there. I got a full scholarship, Castiel will live with me and I will take care of him. I love him, you have my word that I would never let anything happen to him" said Dean.  
"So I can go down quietly, move to California, you can tell your friends some bullshit story and I would never come back if you don´t want me to" Castiel paused "OR… we can do this publicly and we all know how it would end. Your choice now" All of them looked at Cass in awe. He was barely 18 but he proved that he had intimate knowledge about how the family worked and how to press their buttons. In Dean´s eyes it was all love and admiration towards the young man beside him.  
"I am sorry Dean" said John standing up, Dean closed his eyes expecting some harsh words from John "I don´t know how I didn´t see it before"  
"What?" said Dean confused  
"They way you look at him, how you protect him … you really love him. I don´t know If I would ever be ok with two men being together, less with one of my own kids" John lowered his sight from Dean but moved closer and touched his shoulder "but they way you look at him is how I used to look at your mother, so I understand you need to do what you need to do. And I admire you for standing up for who you love even when nobody else approves" John stood up and excused himself from the Novak´s house.  
"So …" started Castiel "We will be upstairs packing. I will leave tonight" he also stood up and left with Dean. Downstairs the arguments exploded.  
Later that day, Castiel left the Novak´s home and put his bags in Dean´s car. They drove to Dean´s home where he had his things packed too. Dean said goodbye to Sam who was heartbroken but promised to call him and email him everyday, even try to visit if John allowed it.  
So they left town, for the very first time, driving in the Impala heading to the sunny California hand in hand. It would take 12 years for them to come back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not the end just jet ... I am planning on a big time come back! You´ll see


	6. Six months later somewhere in the outskirts of San Francisco

Dean carried the last box upstairs and he saw Cass sitting in the living room getting the couch out of its protective wrapping plastic while humming some song he didn´t recognize. He smiled, having Cass living with him was amazing even it is was in a crappy rental one bedroom apartment but now, they finally found a good place, a nice place with two bedrooms and a nice kitchen/livingroom and a little backyard where Cass was already planning for a little urbangarden. Dean felt a ping of excitement, they were settling down, making themselves at home and Cass was all his. Cass looked at Dean and saw his stupid happy smile on his face and that told him that Dean was thinking the same as him right now, how nice it was to settle down and just be themselves together, no other worries than life itself.  
"Is that the last box?" asked Cass  
"Yeah, textbooks babe! They weight a shit-ton" said Dean "we will need to assemble the desks and the shelve to make a corner to study, we are both going to spend a lot of time there" said Dean while helping Cass unwrap the sofa.  
"It is a nice one. I can´t believe it was that cheap" said Dean  
"Well the store was closing, so we had good timing. And to be honest, the minute I saw this couch I started to wonder …" said Cass with a goofy spark in his eyes  
"Wonder what?" asked Dean  
"How nice would it feel to bend you over the armrest and fuck you until you can´t articulate anymore" whispered Cass on his ear making Dean gape with excitement.  
"You should stop wondering … and you should start getting me out of my pants babe" said Dean with a crocked smile.

Cass approached Dean and claimed his mouth with a torrid kiss, slowly but strongly manhandling him out of his clothes until he had the magnificent and very naked Dean displayed in front of him. He fell onto his knees and took Dean on his mouth. Relentless he gave him the most intense blowjob Dean had ever felt until the moment. Cass knew his body very well by now and when he realized that Dean was close to coming he stopped. He softly placed him bent over the sofa´s armrest and let a soft wet lick over his hole. Dean moaned loudly, he felt Cass fumbling in his bag and realized that he was getting the lube and smiled, the night promised amazing sex, Dean was happy. He felt Cass´s lubbed fingers around his anus and shivered with anticipation. The finger slowly entered him and looked for his prostate making Dean cry out with pleasure. After a short prep, Cass slid in and couldn´t contain his own moans anymore. Slowly but nonstop he rocked his hips fucking into Dean, listening to his man moan and hum underneath him, soon he realized he was close and that he didn´t want to cum without being able to kiss Dean. He pulled out and Dean wondered why. Cass helped him get up from the couch and held his hand signalling him towards the bedroom with a head move. Dean smiled and followed Cass to their bedroom. Cass kissed him again and laid down on the bed, with a whisper on Dean´s ear Cass has asked Dean to ride him making him blush. Dean climbed up onto Cass and with a soft move he impaled himself on Cass and rode him with all he had. Soon Cass was bucking up to meet his thrusts and kissing him.  
"I love you Dean" Said Cass fucking him at his earnest  
"I love you too Cass ... ah ah Cass!" answered Dean with ragged breath while feeling his orgasm crawl close.  
"I am so close now" said Cass while sprinting again, the moans and slaps of their bodies was utterly pornographic and Cass Felt Dean´s come spread over his belly and chest. He followed him a couple of thrusts later, cumming inside Dean screaming his name.  
"I wish we could just lie here and sleep, but the bed is not made and I don´t even know where the bedspread is.." said Dean  
"I do, stay there" There was a big box next to the bed and Cass got the bed-cover from is, put it over Dean and slid underneath next to his lover. "We can be lazy for tonight"  
"I cannot even express how happy and complete I feel with you here" whispered Dean  
"I feel the same Dean" Cass kissed him "Marry me Dean?" asked Cass making Dean jump with surprise. He looked at Cass in the eye, did he really meant it?.  
"Do you really mean it? ... I mean we are young, well you are very young and we. … we are here" Dean started to rumble about chances and life and maybe Cass will not feel the same in some years… they will grow apart….  
"Dean, all that is nonsense" said Cass "you are nervous and you are rumbling. Do you love me?"  
"More than anything" said Dean straightforward  
"Do you want to marry me?" asked Dean  
"There is nothing I would love more than being your husband Cass" he answered sincerely  
"See it was easy" said Cass kissing him again "and all that you said, about being young and growing up and growing apart and life … it is true but we will figure it up. All right? Together"  
"Yes Cass, yes yes!" Dean hugged him dearly 

 

So Dean went to the College and got a full ride scholarship to Standford to study law. Castiel graduated with honors and went to art school. When Dean graduated the FBI recruited him, Castiel was very proud of him. Dean told his superiors that he had a fiancé, that it was a man and if that was going to be an issue, he would never accept the job. It wasn´t an issue for his team and Dean excelled at his job. Sam moved to California, he got a degree in history and English lit, he was living in campus but relatively close to them so they would hang out often. On thanksgiving and Christmas, John came to visit and spent some time in California with them, it became a tradition. John slowly became very accepting of their relationship taking into account everything. Cass never had a phone call from the Novaks, none of them, he obviously was bothered about it but he hid it pretty well, from everyone but Dean of course, Dean saw thought him.  
The day that equal marriage law passed on Congress, Cass proposed to Dean again, this time with a ring. He accepted and got married a month later surrounded by his friends and Dean´s family. No Novaks. Castiel got some very successful art shows and started selling his paintings and sculptures for quite good money. Life was good and they thrived as a couple in that apartment.  
Sam got his degrees and decided to return to Lawrence to become a teacher at their highschool. John was very happy to have him back home. Dean often remembered their last time in their home town, the fear of change, the excitement of the new life ahead, the warmth of Castiel´s body in that hotel bed next to him. How far they had come and still how many unhealed injuries left behind. There had been almost 12 years since they left Lawrence never to come back.  
One night the phone rang, Castiel got it, it was Sam, he was crying.  
"Slow down Sam, please tell me what is bothering you, Are you alright?" asked Cass calling Dean from the other room.  
"It is Dad Cass they told him he has cancer!" said Sam barely containing the cries  
"Oh my god" Cass felt he needed to sit down "Dean you need to talk to Sam. It is your father" Cass held Dean´s hand reassuringly  
"Sam?" answered Dean taking the phone and strongly holding Cass´s hand looking for comfort.  
"Dad wasn´t feeling ok and I pushed him to go see a doctor, he has lung cancer Dean" Sam was crying again.  
"What is the prognosis?" asked Dean closing his eyes  
"Well they talked about chemotherapy and radiotherapy but it is going to be expensive Dean, Dad´s crappy insurance with the police will not cover it all… he is not doing good. He talks about going over there to see you one last time until he is too sick to travel… I don´t know what to do" Dean bit his lip to avoid crying out loud. Cass took the phone from his hand.  
"Hey Sam, look we will help you alright?" Said Cass looking at Dean "we will move over there, help with the expenses we some good money saved. Your father will get healthy again. We all together as a family will help him get back into health" Dean started crying and felt he couldn´t stop.  
"Dad will freak out if he knows you are moving back here" said Sam but he sounded hopeful for the first time in their conversation "and … how about your family Cass…"  
"You guys are my family, forget about the rest. And it might be better you do not tell John we are going until we are there." Said Cass "We will get all ready here and we will be on our was as soon as possible."  
"Please take care of Dean, I can hear him cry and I am so dam worried…." Sam muffled a cry as best as he could.  
"I will, take care of yourself and your father. And Sam, you are not alone in this. We are a family, we have your back" said Cass before hanging the phone and kneeling next to Dean "Baby we need to go. This has been our safe heaven but we cannot hide here anymore. Your dad and Sam need us."  
"What did I do to deserved you Cass?, you are the most selfless man I know" said Dean kissing him "I know you are right but … I wouldn´t blame you if you didn´t want to move over there…"  
"Where you go, I go" said Cass "No arguments there. I can paint and sculpt anywhere Dean. You need to get on the phone and figure it out what to do."  
"You are right, we are moving to Lawrence. I can ask for a leave permit and maybe call some people to see if I can get a job in law enforcement in Lawrence, that would be nice" he said  
"You dad said last Christmas they were getting the sheriff retire soon, maybe they will have an opening" Said Cass and grinned "you would look hot in a sheriff´s uniform Dean."  
"You realize that if I work as sheriff I will make a shit-ton less money … and we will be paying for dad´s treatments"  
"Hey, we are ok for now. We will figure it out. I will sell more, paint more … we will figure it out, we always do, together" said Cass  
"Together" said Dean.


	7. Back into the frying pan

You should have seen John´s face when Dean entered the house with Sam and Cass. He was somewhat happy, worried and relieved. Dean went straight to him and hugged him for a long time and John seemed grateful, he also called Cass for a hug and he happily complied.  
"So I guess Sam told you both the news" said John  
"He did" said Dean "look dad I guess you are not going to like what I have to say. But we are moving here and helping you out thought this." Dean looked at John wondering about his reaction.  
"What?" he was still in awe "you are willing to do that after …after I asked you to never come back?"  
"That was a long time ago dad, water under the bridge" said Dean "I thought you already knew that"  
"So you will drop your jobs, your house and move here?" asked John  
"We already did" said Cass "we sold the apartment, Dean got extended leave from FBI and got a new job here in town. And I can do my thing anywhere really, I might just take over your garage if you are fine with it…" said Cass smiling and trying to lighten the atmosphere.  
"I can´t … I don´t want to be a burden" said John  
"You are not dad" said Sam "we love you. I live with you here but I have a job, so if Dean and Cass stay here with us, you will not have to be by yourself and go to the treatments alone."  
"But Dean will work… how I wouldn´t be alone?" John asked  
"I will be here" said Cass  
"Oh no …. You can´t possibly be considering this!" Cass gave a step back in shock, was john mad at the idea of him being in his home?  
"I thought you had long ago stopped hating me … " he said. Dean was looking at his dad confussed  
"NO! no Castiel, that is not what I meant to say!" John covered his face with his hands and sighted "I am sorry Cass, son please that is not what I tried to say. I wondered why… why would you be willing to put up with me … this is no thanksgiving dinner or a couple of days visit, treatments will be rough, I will be pissed and cranky and … taking care of a sick old man is not piece of cake" Cass smiled with hope again "I once threatened to shoot you if you set one foot on my house…" Dean remembered that threat, at that time if sounded a real threat.  
"Well, I always loved a challenge" said Cass "and I don´t think you will shoot me now?".  
"You had always had balls" said John and both his sons cracked with laughter. John stood up from the couch and hugged Cass tightly "thank you both for doing this."  
"Of course" said Cass comforting him.  
"Ok, this house has been a mess since you both lived in California, once Sam came back he had been putting lots of hours in doing chores around but it still felt old and silent. It is going to be good to have it back full and running" said John and then he asked Dean about his new job and quite honestly it freaked a little when knowing that a Winchester was going to be town sheriff.  
While John and Dean talked about town crime and law enforcement dynamics and precautions, Sam helped Cass clear up their new bedroom, clean it deeply and unload their things from the truck. When Dean went upstairs after dinner, he was amazed about how much Cass and Sam had done in one afternoon. He hugged Cass and tried to get comfort in his husband.  
"How are you holding up?" asked Cass  
"I hate seeing him like that, so fragile" said Dean  
"You know it is going to get a lot worse before it can get better… cancer treatment is no joke" said Cass  
"Are you really ready for that … it feels wrong to have you do this …" said Dean  
"Hey I work from home, I will have to clear a corner in the garage and set my studio…" said Cass "we will figure it out. Tomorrow is your first day at work, are you ready to be back?" he asked his husband "because I am not really ready to go to the supermarket or walk down the street and cross paths with my family …"  
"Yeah that gets me worried … that and … well how the town will take the fact that their new town sheriff is gay and married to a man…" confessed Dean  
"Screw them, if we survived this town when we did, we can definitely do it now that we are grown-ups!" said Cass "please babe, lets get to bed"  
"You are right, it has been a hell of a day!" said Dean kissing Cass lovingly "I love you babe. Even more than ever for helping me with this."  
"This is my family Dean, what wouldn´t I do for them?" said Cass and slowly dragged Dean to bed. As soon as they were naked and under the covers they snuggled together and felt asleep almost immediately.  
When the alarm woke them next morning, Dean was the big spoon, Cass felt Dean´s erection poking at him in the right places and smiled.  
"Good morning to you too!" said Cass with a sexy tone.  
"Sorry but we went to sleep naked and I … can´t help it, can´t keep my hand to myself" Dean´s hand trailed down from Cass´s firm pecs to his groin and found Castiel hard like stone. "Uhhh I am not the only on happy we got to sleep naked!"  
"No you are not" said Cass "I guess we will have to get used to quiet sex in a full house."  
"I am up for the challenge … I cannot keep quiet you can always gag me or something!" said Dean while kissing Cass deeply  
"Gagging the sheriff … doesn´t that violate a bunch of laws?" asked Cass overpowering Dean and getting his mouth close to his cock and taking him fast and sloppily. It took some effort to contain his moans while being sucked his brains out by his husband. What an amazing blowjob but then he realized that at some point during the blowjob Cass had started to finger himself and opening up for Dean, desire made him impatient.  
"Fuck babe, please let me inside already" begged Dean and Cass moved from the bed and stood up, hands over the closet door and ass a little out towards Dean, offering himself "All mine" said Dean while lubbing his dick an entering Cass from behind. While Dean fucked him, Cass got his cock in hand and started pumping fast. Dean fucked him rough and fast but with tender hands and words. It was the best sex, Dean holding Cass from behind, standing and pounding him into oblivion. Dean came first inside Cass and instead of pulling of, he battled Cass´s hand over his dick and he finished him making Cass silent cry his orgasm while he was still ball´s deep in him.  
"Shower?" asked Cass  
"Hell yeah, shower, quick breakfast and into the unknown!" said Dean.  
"I love you babe. You will do great, you´ll see" comforted Cass.

Half hour later, they were both downstairs getting breakfast ready. Sam went downstairs as soon as he smelled coffee and John was still asleep.  
"Plan for today?" asked Sam  
"Well you go to work and come back at 5, grocery shopping is on you Sam" said Cass and handed him a list of food. Sam frowned at the list "Good healthy food for you father and honestly for all of us."  
"Alright!" Sam agreed "Dean?"  
"Dean you will have to survive the day, because it is your first week I assume you will be spending lots of time at the station getting up to speed, we expect you for dinner though" said Cass "John has an appointment with the oncologist to start the treatments, so I will be driving him to the hospital today and we will see about the rest of the day" Cass said.  
"Alright babe" said Dean "it seems you have everything under control here"  
"I do" Cass winked at Dean and soften his smile. He loved Dean so much, he was worried about what moving back here will do to his happiness. But they had little choice right now.  
"I love you" said Dean "I have to go face the music!"  
"Be careful" said Cass while Dean left the house  
"Aren´t you worried about being back here in this town…" asked Sam  
"Are you telling me that nothing has changed here in all these years?" asked Cass  
"No apparently not much… " said Sam "but you two are strong and grownups you can handle this and more! I am leaving for work, good luck with dad"  
"Hey!" said John from the door "I heard that ungrateful son!" said John  
"Hear hear dad!, Try to bother Cass too much and scare him off alright?" asked Sam eyeing John carefully  
"I will be on my best behavior!" he promised while sitting down at the kitchen table.  
"Your breakfast John" said Cass serving him something to eat.  
"Thanks Cass, but Sam was right … aren´t you worried? Not a little bit that you will see them?" oh the Novaks! Cass sat down again and left a soundly sight out.  
"I am" he admitted "I try to hide it but it really bothers me that even after all these years … none of them had made the smallest effort to reach out to me. I don´t know how I would feel once we see each other again."  
"I will have your back" said John "Sorry I didn´t before" he admitted with a sour tone.  
"Water under the bridge John" said Cass setting a reassuring hand over his father in law´s shoulder and looking at him in the eye "Let´s go get ready for the oncologist appointment. Right?"  
"Right!" John finished the rest of his breakfast in silence.


	8. New sheriff in town

Dean entered the station with a little cardboard box in his hands, he carried some personal items for his office. He knew the layout of the place like the palm of his hand and after all those years, nothing had changed. Once he arrived to the front desk he immediately recognize the receptionist Charlene. She smiled warmly at Dean.  
-Little Dean!- she said stepping from the reception to hug him  
-Jesus Charlene… don´t call me little Dean- Dean said with pleading voice  
-Well that was the last time, in a minute you will be sheriff, you look very handsome !- she said and inspected him, she stopped on his wedding ring!- and you got married!  
-Yes m´am happily married- said Dean smiling like a fool  
-Awww do you have kids?-she added  
-No jet but maybe soon…- Dean and Cass had discussed the topic here and there and they were getting some info in their options but …- with Dad sick it is not the time.  
-I am sorry about your dad, how is he doing?- Charlene asked politely with a grim face  
-Well he is getting his first chemo session today- said Dean  
-By himself? Or is Sam with him  
-My spouse is with him- and Dean felt happy he just ditched that ball and smiled  
-Ohhh so nice of her- she said and Dean got a flat smile going before excusing himself inside.

-You must be the new Sheriff in town- said a tall African American man by the door- I am Victor Henriksen, I am also new, they moved me over here a month ago- He offered his hand. Dean set the box over the table in his office and shaked Victor´s hand.  
-Dean Winchester, nice to meet you Victor, Where is everybody else?- he asked  
-Well there was an accident on central by the ice cream shop and the other are there, they don´t like me much- Victor signalled himself- I am the new guy, so they told me to stay put and “hold the fort”  
-I see… you didn´t grow around here?- Dean asked  
-No, I am from the city. They said your dad used to work here and that he got early retirement because he is sick, I am sorry- Victor offered Dean a cup of coffee and sat in his office with him.  
-Tanks. Yeah, he has lung cancer, when we got the news, we moved back her from California and here I am- said Dean- he is getting chemo, he will get through this, my dad is a tough man.  
-They told me some stories indeed!- Victor smiled warmly- you used to be FBI in California?  
-Yeah, let me ask you, what is the word around here about me? About the new sheriff?- asked Dean  
-Well, you are from here, I guess that gives you points, they also think your dad raised you alright you ended in FBI, but some are concerned you will get new ideas, changes inspired on your FBI training and they didn´t seem very happy. I am thought, this place need an update if you up for the task.- Victor said honestly  
-Well, I will need to get acquainted with the place again, I will need to see documents. Do you mind sending Jody over here so I can talk to her?- said Dean sitting on his chair- and Victor, thanks for the coffee and your honesty, my door will always be open if you need anything.  
-Dean Dean Dean ….- Jody´s voice got him out of this thoughts- or should I call you sheriff- Dean stood up and hugged Jody.  
-Good to see you Jody, you haven´t aged a day!- said Dean, he stood up and hugged Jody  
-Flattery will take you nowhere with me Winchester!- said Jody jokingly- well I anticipated your demands see if I got short of anything. Here- he put a pile of manila folders over his desk emphatically- these are the arrests we made last year, mostly minor stuff, only one serious case a rape last Christmas- she put another bunch of folders- accounting- another bunch of folders- these are our personnel files including any reports or complaints about the officers- another group of folders- open cases and cold cases, this one is this year´s budget that need your immediate review and approval. The city sheriff is now David Keller and he is expecting a call from you along the week to catch up and meet you- she approached a little and whispered- careful with the guy he is sneaky.   
-Thanks Jody- Dean opened his eyes wide when he saw the many piles of folders over his desk- I think I have more than enough now, I will let you know if there is any other document I need.

She left Dean in his office getting settle down. He first had a look at his personnel files, got to refresh the already familiar faces of the senior offices and meet the new guys, he read the complaints and the formal investigations and he wrote down some interesting things he needed to ask.  
He had a look at the crimes reported last year, DUIs, a couple of small robberies, a bunch of break and entries on high school grounds and the swimming pool, that we all know are just pranks and the football guys partying. There was one rape reported during Christmas, a girl from the city, the case was closed when the city police found the man matching the DNA found in her, he was an ex-convict and he drugged her and drove to the hills to avoid being found. So it wasn´t too bad, the town was not boiling with crime. He had a look at the four folders of open and cold cases. One disappearance, a woman, 25 years ago, Dean frowned because he didn´t remember that incident. He made a mental note to ask his dad about this if he was feeling ok. Dean opened other folder and paled. He knew that boy, he quickly opened the other one and the last one… he couldn´t believe it nobody had ever found the murderer of the two boys and one girl that were killed 12 years ago when Cass and him had skipped town. A cold shiver in his spine made him get his phone and call his husband.  
-Hello love- said Cass  
-Hey Cass, where are you?- asked Dean  
-Well we are on our way from the hospital- said Cass- John got his first session of chemo, he feels tired but alright, we are heading home so he can rest- he heard some whispers- your dad wants to know How is your first day going?- more whispers- and if his guys are giving you “shit”  
-No shit just yet but I have been reviewing paperwork and I need to tell you something that is not nice. I don´t want to freak you out or scare you but- Dean paused… he really didn´t want to do this but he needed Cass to be safe, and for that he needed all the info- I have been looking at the open and cold cases … and I found out that they never got the freak that killed James Milton and Joseph Ketch or the one that killed Anna Hoffman and beat her girlfriend Donna almost to death.  
-Oh god Dean! Removing ghosts from the past? Or do you really think there is danger still?- asked Cass  
-I don´t know Cass, it has been 12 years but three people died and nobody was arrested. He or they might still be out there in town and we need to be extra vigilant alright?- asked Dean begging.  
-I get it, I am a gown up and I can defend myself you know that right?- asked Cass  
-I know babe, I promise I know I am just asking you to … you know… take precautions, close the doors in the house… you know- said Dean realizing that Cass was more than aware that all those things are common sense, Cass said nothing- I just … read the files and needed to hear your voice babe.  
-I understand love. I will be careful you have my word but you fail to remember that I have your dad as my personal bodyguard with me. Nothing can go wrong- said Cass and Dean heard his dad chuckle in the back  
-I love you babe, I´ll see you later.   
-Love you Dean, be careful- said Cass before ending the call. Dean went back to his long list of paperwork to review, the guys were coming back and Dean wanted to talk with each one individually before the prep talk with all the personnel.  
-Is everything alright?- asked John to Cass in the car sensing how tense he got with Dean´s call  
-Dean found the cold cases from 12 years ago, still unsolved and got a little worried- Cass looked at John who flinched a little- don´t worry John, he just jumped into FBI hyper protective husband mode and wanted to make sure I was aware of that potential threat.  
-Does he think there is still danger, that was a long time ago. I am pretty sure there are gay people in town still alive.  
-Yeah but none of them is the new sheriff, he is worried we might draw too much attention to ourselves- Cass wanted to change subject, John didn´t need any worries now- How are you feeling John?  
-Nauseous- said the old man- but still holding up. Wish I could lay in my bed already  
-We are just minutes away, you will be in your bed in no time- said Cass trying to cheer him up- I made soup for later and I will let you rest and I will finish unpacking.  
-You can set up all your painting things in the greenhouse- said John  
-Are you sure?- asked Cass because he knew it was Mary´s greenhouse and no one was allowed there when Dean was young.  
-Well since Mary died I had never used it anymore, it is full of crap, old bikes, tires from the truck, utensils. You should have a look, if you find it suitable, you can make it your own, anything you find in there you can dispose off as you wish- said John and he laid his head towards the side window.  
-Thanks, here we are- finally home. Cass helped John upstairs and in bed. He heated a bowl of soup for John and let him rest.

Castiel let John rest and headed out to the greenhouse to have a look around. He found the place perfect for his work office but there was a lot of cleaning to be done. He got to it and that is how Sam found him once he got home. They decided to stop it there and finish another day, got back inside, had a shower and got dinner ready. John was too tired to get to the diner room with them so they got him dinner to bed and a cup of tea- Castiel´s idea-to help his stomach settle.  
Dean sat down in the couch after dinner with Sam and Cass and felt somehow uneasy about this newfound family life. Was it too easy to come back here? He felt like there was something else waiting for them. When Sam retired to bed, Cass sat on his lap and kissed him.

-What has been going on and on inside that busy head of yours?- asked his husband while kissing his neck  
-What a day … coming back here, going to work at the station, living here in this house … and I have you by my side- said Dean kind of wondering- I am afraid this is not going to end well. And how about you and dad?  
-We got on surprisingly well- said Cass- it will not last but blood will not be spilled, I promise!- said Cass kissing him more. He told him everything about his day and Dean did the same. They will never ran out of things to say to each other.  
-Make love to me Cass- asked Dean on a whisper  
-Let got to bed babe, I will show you how much I missed you today- said his husband with a seductive tone   
As soon as they entered their bedroom Cass pinned Dean against the door and kissed while grinding his erection of Dean´s leg. Dean was also getting hard and seeking friction but he wanted his husband naked, see his gorgeous body, feel his light skin on his, be able to kiss his shoulders, his neck. They started to peel off layers and the clothes laid there spread on the floor while they ended on the bed. Dean took Cass on his mouth and he couldn´t barely hold a loud moan. They were going to be silent because Sam was sleeping only a wall ahead of them.  
On the other room, Sam heard a little bang on the wall, mattress cringing, and a moan. He snapped his eyes open. Oh man! Was he hearing his brother and Cass having sex? Jezzz brain bleach please! Fuck thin walls! He turned around and heard more fumbling and spring mattress cringing noises on the other side of the wall. “Oh yes!” he heard, that was Dean´s voice “Ohhhhh so tight” he was sure that was Cass´s voice. He turned around again and silenced the distant moans by putting his head under the pillow. Then he heard the rhythmic noise of the bed…. Someone was getting fucked … and by the sound of it, it was Dean. And he liked it very very much according to the moans that not even the pillow could muffle.  
Next morning, Sam sat on the kitchen table sipping at his coffee while reading the newspaper, Dean got in the kitchen already dressed in his uniform. Sam noticed he was limping a little and smiled a little.  
-It´s early Dean- Said Sam wondering why his brother was up by 5 am.  
-Yeah I got a call from the station, there has been a break and entry overnight. I am heading to the station. Why are you looking at me like that …- asked Dean a little worried by the look Sam had.  
-I … I wanted to talk to you about something. Well now that we are all going to be living in the house together … I- Sam hesitated  
-You what?- asked Dean while serving some coffee and sitting down with Sam  
-There is not a not embarrassing way to say this, don´t freak out but I can hear everything that goes on in your bedroom from my room- said Sam  
-Oh!- Dean opened his eyes widely realizing that Sam had heard him and Cass having sex- Sorry we were trying to be silent but …  
-I know, you need to buy another bed, that one cringes every time you move and… maybe separate it a little from the wall?- he suggested getting all blushed  
-Alright Sam … whatever makes you feel more comfortable.- said Dean hiding his face on his hands  
-What… what is it like?- asked Sam on a whisper  
-What is like what exactly Sam?- asked Dean wondering what Sam is asking right now, was he asking about sex?  
-It sounded like you were … on the receiving end and it sounded like you liked it… a lot… I was wondering what is like…- Sam suddenly shacked his head and stood up- forget it! This is just stupid! I shouldn´t have asked that.  
-Hey hey Sam …- Dean stopped him and looked at him begging to sit down again. He did.- do you… like men?  
-I … I think so. I also like women- said Sam quickly afterwards  
-Alright so you are bisexual but from your question I get that you never had anything with a man before… and you are considering to try?- asked Dean  
-Fuck my life – said Sam shaking his head and zipping from his coffee- There is this guy at school, he is great, he is also a teacher, he teaches music and he is very attractive … I have never felt like this before for a man- confessed Sam  
-Well, you were right about last night, I was the bottom, it is not always like that…Cass and I like to switch.- Dean tried to look at Sam but felt embarrassed by the conversation- It feels really good when your partner takes good care of you, you need a lot of prep but that can also be very pleasurable. For me is not just the pleasure of getting a dick you know … there.- Now he was sure he was completely red- it is about belonging to Cass, letting him own me. I can´t explain very well- Dean stopped for a moment gathering his thoughts- I never wanted to or even considered having sex with another man, never wondered how a dick would feel like next to mine. But with Cass is about … well it is about Cass. I can´t ever have enough of him- said Dean.  
-Thanks Dean- Sam sighted- I never imagined having this conversation with you.  
-Well, you surprised me there. But you should know that I don´t care who you sleep with, man or woman … top or bottom… I just want you to be happy. So, don´t worry about Cass and me, we will have your back- Dean held a hand over Sam´s shoulder and squeezed reassuringly- and I will buy a new bed ASAP … not sure what we can do about the noise though.   
-You are lucky we put dad´s room on the first floor!- said Sam laughing  
-Oh man! Don´t even said it … gross- said Dean getting more coffee in his mug and heading to the station. He texted Cass from the car.  
“Got called from the station. You looked like an angel this morning, a very naked handsome angel on my bed. How did I get so lucky? I love you babe”


	9. Barbecue at the sheriff´s house

Dean gathered all his officers in the meeting room. He had indeed made some changes in the station and got some budget extension and that made everyone happy. He also made sure that there were police-FBI combined training sessions available for their officers so they can volunteer to go and learn about who to manage better a ransom or a hostage situation, public shooting or how to treat a rape or abused victim. All in all his officers seem happy.  
-The last four weeks have been complicated but you have all succeeded to get the best out there- said Dean- I am really happy to be working here with you all. You should know that my dad had his last session of his first round, he is feeling better these days because he is chemo free for two weeks. So I am inviting you all with your spouses or partners to come over the Winchester house for a barbecue this Saturday afternoon- some looked happily at the plan, a couple of the older officers looked at him weird- but before you come over, I don´t want any nasty surprises at my home. You all know that I am married, I am assuming that as clever policeman, those who have been in my office had seen the pictures of my family, but just in case for those oblivious to the obvious, I am married to a man. His name is Cass.  
-I don´t care as long as there is beer and food- said Victor and many agreed.  
-If any of you feel uncomfortable with it, I won´t mind if you don´t come but- Dean wanted to make this clear- I would not tolerate any kind of homophobic or deplorable behavior or comment towards my husband. I hope I am clear…- said Dean  
-Cristal sheriff- said Jody- Winchester´s burgers have the best reputation! I am going to get stuffed with them!  
-Excuse me boss- asked Riley Jones one of the oldest officers- it is none of my business but your husband, Cass… wouldn´t he be a Novak right?- he asked shyly  
-Yes, he is- said Dean- he is the youngest of the Novaks kids.- Dean saw Riley´s eyes open wide with awe- Why are you asking me this?  
-Well… my mother attends church with them, their son Luc is now the preacher and … well his sermons are violent against gays.   
-Well Luc had always … well all of them have always been less than friendly towards gays… even to their brother. Cass hasn´t seen them or heard from them in the last 12 years, since we left Lawrence… since the murders- said Dean  
-Yeah I know you were checking the cold cases, we never solved those cases, I think mostly we didn´t solved them because the former sheriff was … tolerant towards homophobia- said Riley barely on a whisper- we had a list of suspects, the Novaks were on that list you should know.  
-Yeah my dad told me- said Dean- Cass asked Michael about it but he denied having any knowledge. We left and nobody bugged us in California they knew where we lived cause we have sent a Christmas card to them every year since we left.  
-If you want to reopen those cases … we might be able to get somewhere else now- suggested Riley  
-If you are up for it, we can work on it quietly, maybe with Victor?- he suggested- he is new here and he could use some help to get to know how things work around. What do you think?- asked Dean  
-Well I think you are using the excuse to get me in charge of the rookie- said Riley  
-Yeah, that exactly- Dean said patting him on the shoulder- go home to your wife, I am going home to my lovely husband. It is Friday and I promise to take him out on a date!- Dean smiled and left the station.  
Once he arrived home, had a quick shower, dressed nicely and went downstairs, Cass was sitting on the couch with John chatting. He looked so handsome!  
-Hello beautiful!- said Dean leaning into Cass´s space for a kiss- Are you ready?- he asked  
-Yes love- said Cass but before getting up from the couch he approached John- are you going to be alright? Do you need anything before we go?  
-Yes guys, I feel good. I already took food and meds, as soon as I feel tired I will just get into bed. Are you sure you guys want to go out on a date together? Here?  
-Dad …- started Dean, he was going to stop his dad but realized he might have a point  
-Well, this is not California Son, you might get into trouble!- said John.  
-Don´t worry John, we will be just fine- said Cass- we will have our phones on, call us is you need anything. Cass and Dean left the house holding hands. The impala was parked at the front door , Dean opened the door for his husband and drove downtown.

They walked downtown hand in hand, they had reservations at Lugi´s which was by far the fanciest place in town. Dean had never had dinner in there before but he could tell decoration hadn´t changed in the last 12 years. He held Castiel´s hand over the table and that got him some curious looks from the closer tables, nobody said anything though. When they were having coffee Dean saw an old friend from the team and raised a hand to say hi, they guy and his beautiful partner approached their table.  
-If I don´t see it I won´t believe it, Dean Winchester in town!- he said and Cass remembered him Antony was his name?  
-Tony Kluntz you look great man!- said Dean holding his hand, Tony looked towards Cass with a curious look- how impolite of me, sorry- He was talking to Cass- babe? Do you remember Anthony he was in my class, we used to play football together, Tony this is my husband Castiel Novak  
-Of course I remember him, you are Michael´s younger brother right?- he asked and that made Cass tense, he shook his hand politely.  
-Yes, it is nice to see you again- said Castiel  
-My name is Darla- said the woman with Tony making him feel embarrassed for not having introduced her- You don´t remember me right Dean? – Dean looked at her quite shocked and lost  
-Sorry? I don´t think so- he said apologetically  
-We went out on a couple of dates back them Dean- she winked to Cass- but I understand now why I didn´t make an impression- Cass contained an smile and he saw Dean blushing a little  
-Darla Oszwald you we on the cheer leading team- said Dean- sorry I couldn´t place you  
-No worries it has been more than a decade, you look great, both of you- she said a little sad- what brings you both around here to the decadent Lawrence, last thing I heard is that you were in Califronia!  
-Family- answered Dean  
-Really?- asked Tony- no offense but the Novaks are … well you know- and he made a face and move his hand with his finger in circles like they were nuts- and I had the impression you hated your old man.  
-People change- said Cass- not my family though you are quite right but his dad, we have a good relationship now and he needed us here.  
-That is very nice of you, and do you already have jobs otherwise I might be able to help you find something, my dad still own the factory- Darla offered nicely  
-Thanks but we do. I am the new sheriff and Cass he is an artist, he is still building his new studio here but soon he will be working, you should see what he is capable of creating, he is very talented- said Dean.  
-My sister owns the gallery and arts store downtown- said Tony- Marianne do you remember her?  
\- I remember that little monkey with braids that used to follow you everywhere …- said Dean smiling  
-Yeah, well I am getting old and she is now a successful businesswoman and a talented artist herself, we might need to introduce them- said pointing to Cass- we cannot have two artist in town that don´t know about each other!  
-I would love that!- said Cass enthusiastically. He dug in his wallet and got out a card, maybe you can give her my contact.  
-Sure will- Tony offered his arm to Darla- shall we go dancing beautiful?  
-Have fun guys! It was nice seeing you again!- said Dean winking at Darla that looked very happy to be the center of Tony´s attention again.  
-How about us “beautiful”- said Dean with Darla´s intonation  
-Dancing? No thanks!- said Cass- but ice cream…- you might convince me  
-Ice cream it is- he said kissing his hand lovingly, he called the waiter and ask for the check, he paid and left a good tip because they treated them good.

They walked to the ice cream store lazily, Dean had Cass close to him with an arm over his shoulder, they enjoyed the night and they happily saw the ice cream place was still open, there were plenty of customers there buying their ice cream. The waited in the row. When they got their turn Dean asked for chocolate vanilla and Cass for chocolate mint, but the waiter did not serve them, he just stared at them.  
-We don´t serve fags- he said like it was the most normal thing to say in the world  
-Excuse me?- asked Cass not quite believing what he was hearing  
-Are you deaf on top of being a pillow biter?- he said more confidently than before  
-Watch your mouth!- said Dean- I would like to talk to the boss  
-We should go Dean- asked Cass  
-In a second babe, please- asked Dean.  
-I am the owner- said a big man coming from the back of the store- is there a problem?  
-Your employee didn´t want to serve us ice cream and was very rude- said Dean- we would like two ice creams please and an apology from your employee would be in order too  
-Sorry, I am the owner and I reserve the right to serve or not as I wish, my employee here was right, we don´t serve fags! You should get out of this town, we don´t tolerate your kind around here!- said the man.  
-You look very cocky behind that counter- said Dean- I remember you now Richard, you didn´t use to be suck and asshole- that threw the guy off a little, he obviously didn´t remember Dean.  
-Let´s go- asked Dean  
-Yes please, just go, I have customers waiting- Richard was still looking at Dean and Cass trying to figure it out how they were, the he looked behind him and opened his eyes in surprise- Hello pastor, would you like your usual  
-Yes, Richard- said a familiar voice that made Cass turn around immediately. His brother Luc was there looking at him.  
-You should preach to these two, maybe they will see god and forget about their ways- said Richard to the pastor pointing at them  
-There is no salvation for this one- said Luc looking at Cass and then turning around like he was not even there.  
-Let´s go- said Cass pushing Dean a little, he needed to get out as soon as possible.  
-Your brother is an asshole!- said Dean looking back, Cass was walking fast towards the car, the night was ruined and not by the ice cream dick but after a whole month of successfully avoiding his family, Cass had crossed paths with one of his siblings. Dean speed up and tried to get hold of Cass- babe?- he only stopped once he got to the car, Castiel´s eyes were shinny with contained tears. Dean said nothing else, opened the car for him and drove them home.  
Once he got home, he parked the car in the garage and turned to Cass so they could talk about it but his husband got out of the car and into the house by himself fast. Dean sighted, he knew this was coming. He felt bad, like this was his fault somehow. He got out of the car and into the house. Sam was there looking at him with a worried face.  
-What happened Dean? Cass was almost crying and got upstairs without saying a word.- asked Sam  
-We …- Dean sighted loudly letting the pressure from the evening wash out a little- we went out on a date. Dinner at Lugi´s and then we went for a walk and ice cream. Richard Cole is working at the ice cream store now, I guess his dad retired…  
-His dad passed away last year, but he has been in charge of the place for a while now- said Sam  
-Well he said he didn´t serve fags, we exchanged some words, Cass was embarrassed and wanted to leave, but I wanted to face that coward- Dean sat down on the couch- if we had left when Cass wanted …  
-What happened Dean, did you hit the guy?- asked Sam  
-What? No!- he looked at Sam wondering what the heel was that kid thinking- no, but when we were leaving Cass´s brother Luc, the preacher was there. Richard said he should pray so we could be forgiven for being sinners of some shit and Luc said there was not salvation possible for Cass.  
-Fuck!- said Sam sitting next to Dean  
-He didn´t say a word all they way here, he was containing the tears. I … I knew this was going to happen sooner or later but … I always feared that coming over here was going to make Cass unhappy… I am afraid he will… that we will…- Dean was shaking now, reality was sitting in.  
-Hey, Cass will not leave you Dean. He loves you- Sam was trying to stop the self destructive line of thinking his brother was getting in- He loves you more than I have ever seem possible. It is going to be hard for him, he needs you, you need to be there for him, he loves you Dean.  
-Sam is right- said Cass from the stairs startling them- I realized it seemed like I was angry at you but that is not the case Dean- Cass came all the way downstairs and got to the couch next to Dean and Sam- my family sucks- said while he sat down there  
-yeah they do- said Sam- you need to realize that you will find them… all of them eventually  
-I know- Cass held Dean´s hand- sorry I reacted badly but… I was having such a lovely night and it caught me with my guard down. Forgive me?- asked Cass  
-Nothing to forgive Cass. I am sorry I engaged on an argument with that dick from the ice cream place- he hugged Cass- I am sorry babe  
-Let´s go to bed, tomorrow we will have the house full of policeman.. very hungry policeman and there will be tons of work- said Cass. Dean agreed and they all went to bed.  
It was 4.30 when Dean´s officers and family started coming. Some even brought their kid and they were happily running around the backyard, they house got full of noise and laughter really quick. Sam was on barbecue duty, Dean and John were on the welcoming committee and Cass was in charge of the food.  
-Excuse me?- said a female voice- my husband told me that I could leave the salad over here  
-Sure- said Cass turning around to greet the woman but when he turned around what he saw left him breathless- Annael?- Cass asked like on a whisper.  
-Hello Castiel- said Anna with a smile- I was so sure it was you when Oscar told me that the new sheriff was Dean and that he was married to a man. I knew it had to be you!- she stepped closer and Castiel gave one step backwards like he was waiting for the bad words to hit him.  
-Babe?- He heard Dean´s voice entering the kitchen- I would like to introduce you to Oscar, he is one of the officers that will be attending the FBI task force courses in the city next week- but as soon as he saw Castiel´s face he saw his horror expression he stopped and run towards him- Are you alright?  
-Annael- he said pointing at the woman over there and then Dean saw her, she looked worried but not hostile.  
-He is Oscar´s wife Cass. Hi Anna- said Dean raising a hand and smiling- nice to see you again. Sorry I didn´t recognize you when Oscar introduced you.  
-It has been a long time Dean- said Anna with a warm voice- Oscar, Dean´s husband is my brother Castiel- Oscar looked at them in awe.  
-Wow! You haven´t seen each other in 10 years!- said Oscar- this is big!  
-More like 12 years and yes, this is big. I know we haven´t seen each other in a long time Castiel but I only want to say that I am happy you and Dean are together. I am happy this all ended up good for you. I always wondered what you were doing out there … if you were alright- Cass looked at her surprised.  
-It is true Castiel. Anna had always tried to find you but she was afraid of contacting you after … well … does he know?- he asked Anna  
-Know about what?- asked Cass talking for the first time and composing himself a little, he still held Dean close.  
-I don´t see how he would know- said Anna- when you left things went crazy very quickly. Michael and dad wanted to force you back and they called Luc…- the mention of that name made Cass shiver.  
-I saw him yesterday- said Cass- I saw Luc yesterday  
-He moved back to Lawrence and somehow he took over the family, mother supported him. He became pastor and he started preaching and spreading hate towards everything- said Anna- gays for sure, but the poor, he had some strong ideas about what was the role of women on a marriage, about how children should be raised … it was awful. I met Oscar, they didn´t approve much.  
-I was not religious enough and didn´t share their ideas, I went once to church with them and Sunday lunch, we ended having a strong discussion over the fact that Anna wanted to keep working even if we got married. I told them that what happened when we got married was just Anna´s business and mine that they had no say in this- said Oscar  
-They pushed me to break up with him- said Anna- So I left, moved in with him- they stopped talking to me. For them I no longer exist.  
-I am sorry Anna- said Cass moving away from Dean´s arms and enveloping Anna on a soft hug. Anna cried in his shoulder-I missed you sister.  
-I missed you too Castiel- they were still hugging when Dean signed Oscar to go outside and give them some time.  
-Wow that was intense- said Oscar- so it seems we are practically in-laws  
-Are you ok with that?- asked Dean  
-Yes Dean, I am, both Anna and me are happy for you both- said Oscar while looking to the kids running around the garden- Anna will tell Castiel but you should know that we are pregnant and soon you both will get to be uncles. I know I talk from Anna too when I say we would very much like to have you both in our lives and out kid´s life.  
-Congratulations!- said Dean- becoming a dad is a big step! Are you ready for the craziness?  
-Not really but I am ready to try… do you and Cass think about kids?- asked Oscar  
-We talked about it but with the move and my new job, my sick dad … it seems we are keeping those ideas on hold- Dean felt a little envious that Oscar and Anna could just naturally have a baby together… he wished he could have a baby that was both Cass´s and his.   
-You seem worried boss- asked Victor approaching  
-I was asking about him and Cass having kids and I might have freaked him out a little- said Oscar and both man laughed at Dean´s shocked expression  
-You are a bunch of ungrateful bastards, but no worries I will take it out on you. When Cass and I get to have this house full of crying kids that will not let me sleep I would unleash all my crankiness at you both in the office. Count on it- said Dean smiling now.

It was almost midnight when finally Dean and Cass got to head upstairs to bed. They were exhausted, the evening was great. Cass spend almost all afternoon with his sister and was so happy. Dean loved to see Cass like that, beaming with plans and excitement. He was going to be an uncle! Dean held him on his arms and they both felt asleep in their warmth.


	10. Through thick and thin

Three weeks later, hell unleashed on them. John was back on a second round of chemo that was being remarkably hard on him, Dean was muddling through some issues at the station and didn´t want to discuss with Cass and Sam was somewhat moody due to his crush on his colleague and he was struggling to keep it professional and doubting if he wanted to come out of the cosset taking into account the hate his brother and Cass had to face from time to time. So Cass worried. He worried that John was worse, he worried that Dean was dealing with some serious issues and problems probably caused by the Novaks and their hate towards him. He worried he was giving Sam the idea that one could not get out of the closet and be happy. He worried he was not being helpful at all.  
Weeks like this were as closer to hell as Cass could possibly imagine. He had driven John, an angry, delicate and sick John to the hospital for his treatment and back, he tried to make him eat something twice along the day and instead he got called some names … he made soup for John, maybe if it was something not as solid he would muddle through some, he needed some food in to deal with that treatment or the chemo itself would kill him. Late in the afternoon he had pushed John to eat some soup and he agreed finally, probably to make Cass shut up and leave him alone. Not even fifteen minutes later, he heard John hurling in the downstairs bathroom. Damm it!  
He asked if he needed help through the closed door, nothing, just more vomiting noise. He decided to go in. The view was terrifying. John was laying down on the tiles, almost naked. He was squalid, malnourished, pale and purple in some places. He was crying, not loudly but Cass could see it in the way he was shaking.  
Cass got a banquet and covered him, dragged him into his arms and hugged him a little. He told him that feeling like this was normal, that there were bad rounds and good rounds but that if he held on the fighting spirit he would defeat the Cancer. He told John that the four of them will stick together and fight against the Cancer, that he was not alone.  
-Why are you even doing this Castiel?- mumbled John when he calmed down a little  
-Because you need help- said Cass- but also because I love Dean.  
-I said a bunch of terrible things about gay guys- continued John and despite Cass´s efforts to make him stop he continued- I hated that Dean loved you. I hated that he was gay… I said some terrible things about my own son… I told him to leave and never come back  
-Hey, that is … water- but John cut him  
-Don´t say it´s water under the bridge, because we know it is not really true. You know Dean better than anyone here- John stated- does he hate me for giving him a terrible youth?  
-He doesn´t hate you John, he loves you- Cass made sure he change his posture so John could see him face to face now- Dean worships you. You need to understand, Dean all he wanted all his live was your love, your approval, to be like you. I never knew what I wanted until I met Dean, thought I wanted to be a vet but instead I ended up painting. Dean supported my choice. He just wanted me to be happy. He takes care of everyone, he carries the weight of the world on his shoulders and he became law enforcement because he admires you John.  
-I don´t know about that … but I get what you say, Yeah he had always had that look in his eyes … like if something was wrong he felt it was somewhat his fault- said John- instead of helping him I blamed him for so many things.  
-Yeah, one day he told me he only wanted to know why you didn´t love him- Cass admitted- he felt like you loved Sam but not him. He didn´t understand why at the beginning, later he thought it was due to his sexuality.  
-Oh god! I messed up so much!- John tried to sit down but he was in pain, Cass helped him still wrapped in the blanket- When their mom died I was lost for so long. She was so caring, so loving, when I lost her… there was no love left in the house, it felt like a terrible place to be. I didn´t want to spend time in here, so I launched myself at work. With Sam it was easier, he was a baby, he didn´t remember her but Dean, he missed her and I could see it in his eyes so like her…. And he looks so much like her … I see so much of Mary in Dean, not just physically but in his ways too.  
-Is that why you were tougher on him?- asked Cass  
-I guess so. I didn´t do it on purpose though. He was a constant reminder of what we lost and … I have been a terrible father.- said John dropping his face into his hands. Cass held his cold hand trying to comfort him.  
-You lost too much. She was beautiful inside and out. Dean speaks of her a lot. He has lots of little memories here and there- Cass said- you were all alone in your grieving, you did the best you could. And about the homophobic phase … well look where we are right now… do you still hate me?  
-You know I don´t- said John- Sometimes I cannot wrap my hear around the fact that you guys let me be part of your family after everything I have done- said John- I pushed them away so hard, if you weren´t all so dam stubborn I will be here dying alone.  
-We are family- said Cass- and you are not dying! The fight is not over alright?- said Cass trying to get John to have hope.  
-You are a great person Cass, I am so dam grateful that Dean had found somebody like you. You make him happy and that is the most important thing for me- said John  
\- Cass!- Dean´s voice came from the front door- I am home!  
-We are here! First floor bathroom- Cass yelled.  
-What are you guys doing here? Hey hay Dad!!! Do you feel alright dad?- asked Dean kneeling by their side  
-I have had better days but I am grateful I am not alone in this- Said John looking at Castiel and that made Dean´s heart flutter. Castiel had John wrapped on a blanket que he was holding his hands.  
-Of course you are not alone! – Said Dean helping his father up from the bathroom floor and helping him to bed- You have us! Everything Is going to be alright dad!  
-Dean … -John thought about what to say but he decided that nor words were enough, he hugged Dean tight and whispered in his ear- I love you son!   
-I love you too dad- Dean said looking at John in the eye- rest a little, I will bring you some dinner you need to get some meat on those bones.  
Dean and Cass left the room and John to rest, Cass held his hand. Dean sighted and decided to come clean to his husband. Fuck the way Cass was taking care of John had Dean more in love than ever, he didn´t want to worry him with more but… it was time he told Cass.  
-I have something I need to tell you Cass, not a good thing- said Dean sitting on the kitchen counter with a defeat gesture  
-Yeah I figured that whatever it has been eating at you was bad … you didn´t want to talk and I didn´t push. But if you want to tell me, I am here- said Cass  
-I reopened the murder investigations from 12 years ago. Since I did that, we have been getting some estrange phone calls at the station, letters, someone vandalized a patrol car … there have been some threats …- Dean said slowly carefully examining Cass´s reaction.  
-So it is safe to assume we might be in danger- said Cass- and that is what has been keeping you on edge?, you are not sleeping and you are tense … I played along babe but I know you, you don´t have to spare my feelings alright?  
-I am sorry- Dean melted on Cass´s embrace- I am sorry I made your life extra difficult. What you are doing for John is difficult enough…  
-He called me “righteous bastard” this morning when I tried to push him to eat something- Cass smiled and shrug his shoulder- he is going through a bad time. The longer I spend with him, the closer we get the more I feel him like my own dad … I haven´t really had a dad in the last 12 years Dean.  
-He told me he loved me… he worries me- Dean asked Cass- is he giving up on the fight?  
-No no no babe- Cass kissed him- But he has been a lot of time to think about the things he regrets of his life and not being a good parent is the one he regrets the most apparently. Having you here is making him think about all the things he did wrong about you…- Cass said kissing Dean again- he said you remind him of Mary so much…  
-Did he say that?- Dean wondered- he never told me..  
-He is still in pain everytime he talks about her- said Castiel- and honestly I understand- Dean looked at him with a frown so Cass explained- babe if something happened to you … if I ever lose you, I don´t think I would never get over it.   
-babe- Dean hugged him tight and kissed his temple-I love you so much!  
-Hey Do you want to see the studio? I finished it today- said Cass  
-Did you? I would love to see it!- Dean stood up and both got out into the backyard through the kitchen door. The night was chilli, they followed the path of solar lightsticks that Cass and Dean had bought on the home depot a week ago- So nice Cass you put them to mark the pebble path to the greenhouse!  
-Yeah, looks good right?- Said Cass happily- are you ready?- Cass opened the green house and turned on the light. Dean looked around in awe.  
The green house wasn´t too big, but all cleaned up it looked beautiful. Cass had used some of the shelves and he had unpacked his studio, now the space that had always been crowded with junk and boxes, was clean, ample, welcoming and full of canvas and easels. On the background there was also a carving and sculpting area where Cass was reassembling one of his last creations.   
-This looks amazing love- said Dean- I though the other day that we could go to the cottage and see if you might rescue some of my mom´s art if it is still there…  
-I would love to Dean- said Cass and then he blushed deeply- I have very nice memories about that place …- Dean smiled remembering the last time he was there.  
-Indeed, nice memories Cass- whispered Dean against his mouth and suddenly he grabbed Cass´s ass and brought him flush against his body- I saw you completely naked for the first time in that cottage …  
-I had my very hot boyfriend give me my very first blowjob Dean, I love that cottage- said Cass while before kissing him deeply  
-What a coincidence babe, I gave my first blowjob there … what is more I have very vivid memories of loosing my virginity over there- said Dean slipping his hand into Cass´s pants and grabbing his hard dick. Cass moaned into the touch and dropped his head back leaving his neck exposed to Dean´s ministrations. And just in that position, moaning and rocking together is how Sam found them when he opened the greenhouse door.  
-Fuck guys!- said Sam- Ohhh jezzz I didn´t need that image of my brother at all- Said Sam turning around while he heard Cass and Dean rush to rearrange their clothes- the studio looks great by the way.  
-Thanks Sam- said Cass- I finished today. You can turn around now Sam- Cass said  
\- Thanks God! Guys you need to put a sock in the door or something- said Sam joking- I brought dinner and it is getting cold now.  
\- Sam man… you need to get used to this because Cass and I we… were used to be by ourselves and we are not used to deal with a house full of people. Sorry- said Dean  
-Sorry Sam- said Cass- We will try to keep it behind locked doors. Do you like the solar lights?  
-Yes Cass, it looks very nice!- Sam complimented him while following them back into the house and in the kitchen. They were about to sit down for dinner when somebody knocked at the door.  
-I will get it- offered Cass- please bring that plate to your dad Sam, see if you can convince him to eat something or There is still tomato soup if he wants it better- Cass was getting to the door when Dean stopped him.  
-Wait babe, with everything that is happening we need to be extra careful. Dean looked thought the peephole and frowned- he stepped back and his face was shocked  
-What? what?- asked Cass. Dean opened the door and Cass saw his mother and father standing there. His face got dead serious.  
-Hello Dean, Castiel- said his father- we need to talk.  
-I don´t see what we might want to talk about- said Cass defensive  
-Whatever this is, come in- said Dean- we are not having this discussion for the neighbor to enjoy- Naomi entered first, Chuck followed with an angry look- Please take a seat- Dean offered looking at Cass and opening his eye widely while shrugging his shoulders in a “what is going on here babe” gesture  
-Dad wanted the soup better so I reheated som….- Sam froze mid word when he saw the Novaks there in their Livingroom- Oh… Hello?  
-Hello Sammuel- said Naomi- How are you doing?  
-What are you doing?- asked Cass repeating Naomi´s tone- What are you doing here?- he asked angrily  
-To the point, I always like that about you, no need for embellishments, you were always plain and straightforward. I see that haven´t changed- said his mom.  
-Mother!- Cass´s tone was a warning  
-We wanted to know why are you here Castiel- asked Chuck- I thought you agreed to never come back  
-Things change- said Cass crossing his arms  
-We had an agreement!- said Naomi  
-Is that what you really want to ask after 12 years- Cass was boiling with rage inside, Dean knew this was coming, he had been silently dealing with this feeling for years- no wondering about what I have done with my life? Or if I am in good health? Maybe you wonder about my marriage? No? Yeah that is what I thought.  
-Cass ..- said Sam trying to calm him. Dean stopped him and held his arm bringing Sam backwards. Sam looked at him wondering about why Dean was letting this happen but he saw something in his brother´s eyes that made him stop questioning him.  
-Dean and I moved back here, permanently- said Cass- so you need to get used to have us in town.  
-Permanently?- said Naomi her face almost twisted in horror  
-Yes, we moved here. Dean is the new sheriff in town, but I guess you already know that. I already settled my office here too. We decided to move back and live close to the family- said Cass  
-Your family doesn´t want you back here, you are a disgrace!- said Naomi  
-Well, that is not the opinion of John or Sam, they are happy to have us back. Annael is happy too, we had her and her lovely husband over for dinner two weeks ago. Gabriel is coming to visit this weekend too- Castiel smirked when he saw both his parents breathe fire when mentioning his siblings, more than anything Gabriel that they have disowned when Cass was a little boy.  
-You are ruining us!- said Chuck- having you here is bad for the business. You are humiliating us in front of customers and church fellows!  
-Oh I am so sorry that I don´t give a fuck- said Cass- You should get out of my house- said Cass  
-Oh your house? This is not your house!- said Naomi- you have nothing here!  
-You are wrong Naomi- said John behind them- This house belongs to my kids, the three of them. So it is Castiel´s home as much as mine. He has a loving family here with us, he has a husband that adores him and he has talent. You should have more respect and leave, never come back to insult him in his own home.  
-We saw things the same once John- said Chuck- what happened?  
-I grew up- said John harshly- you might want try it. You might start by telling your son Luc to stop preaching hate. Because if something happens to any of my kids due to his bullshit, anything at all… I will kill him myself.  
-Get out now, you have said enough- said Dean opening the door for them. The Novaks looked quite in shock but soon they collected their pride and left without looking back.  
-I am going back to bed all that bullshit gave me a headache- said John but before he could move Cass was hugging him and crying. Dean and Sam were in shock- don´t worry son, I have your back. You are not alone!  
Cass let John go and went back to the kitchen, reheated the food. The had some but were not hungry after the surprise appearance of the Novaks… man the week could not get any worse. When finished, Cass headed upstairs to bed and Dean and Sam handled the cleaning and locking of doors and windows.  
-I am still in shock about what dad said- said Sam  
-The hug! Did you see the hug?- asked Dean  
-Yeah … well they are close, makes sense, Cass has been taking care of him all this time but… I never thought…- said Sam  
-Yeah me neither- agreed Dean  
-You should get upstairs and see if a little kinky sex can help Cass relax- proposed Sam with an amused smile  
-Yeah …good idea- Dean dropped the towel leaving the dishes and went to bed with Cass.


	11. Meeting Gabriel

Friday came around and in the afternoon, Gabriel Novak arrived to the Winchester´s home. A maybe to vigorous and nervous ring at the door made Cass smile. When he opened the door he couldn´t barely recognize his older brother.  
-Gabe?- Cass asked looking at the man in the threshold. Nicely dressed, a little shorter than him, long hair nicely combed- although not as long as Sam´s- goofy smile but worried eyes  
-The one and only Cassie!- said Gabriel moving forward and hugging his little brother. Cass felt uncomfortable in the hug- eh! You better hug me back because I am not letting you go until you hug me like I remember you used to do. Finally Cass gave up and hugged Gabriel back- alright! It can be improved but I approve.  
-Hello- said Dean from the hall- please come in, let me take that for you- said Dean getting his little suitcase from him  
-You must be officer Winchester- said Gabriel  
-Oh man, don´t call me that in my house…- said Dean- makes me feel like I am a sixty year old man…  
-Please get in Gabriel- said Cass stepping aside and letting him in- this is my husband Dean and yes, he is the town sheriff.  
-Nice to meet you Dean- Gabriel extended his hand towards Dean and he shakes it.  
-Oh man- said Sam walking down the stairs- the guest room is ready.. when is your big bro arriving Cass?  
-Hello?- said Gabriel waving to Sam, as soon as he saw Gabe he flushed red with embarrassment- big bro already here.  
-Oh hi!- said Sam still red as a tomato- I am Sam, Dean´s younger brother.  
-It is very nice to meet you Sam- said Gabriel with a honest smile and thought Dam! This young boy is really attractive!   
-Likewise Gabriel- said Sam- do you want something to drink?  
-Do you have some coffee, it has been a long flight and I need to admit Cassie, the idea of coming back here after all this years had kept me awake the last 3 days- Gabe sat down in the couch, still looking at Cass, Sam sat down with them- You haven´t changed much brother.  
-Really?- asked Cass- you have  
-It is the long hair right? Mother would hate it!- he smiled goofy and happy  
-Of course she would, can you imagine going to church with that hairdo! It is pretty sure described as a sin in the bible… somewhere- said Cass with a serious voice but a smile in his face  
-Yeah, next to watching tv and playing videogames- added Gabe and they both laughed hard. Dean looked at them happily from the kitchen counter preparing the coffee- So Anna told me more of less what you have been up to. I might confess that …- Gabe looked at Cass and got serious- I … I was a little afraid when she told me you wanted to get in touch with me.  
-Why?- asked Cass  
-Well… you were just a kid when I left for Stanford and then … shit went down and I wasn´t allowed to come back anymore. I guess I convinced myself you would hate me too- Gabriel´s sight was now focused on his own hands on his lap- I … when… when Anna found me I was surprised. She explained lots of things that had happened in between she said you left for good with a boy heading to California and for a while I hoped we could see each other. I found myself wondering about guys with familiar faces and blue eyes… what if he was Cassie? … I thought about looking for you but I chickened out.  
\- What happened when you left for Stanford? Why did they kick you out? – asked Cass and Gabe paled- you don´t have to tell me if you don´t want to.  
-I went to a frat party, drank a lot, passed out. When I regained consciousness I was in the hospital it turns out somebody had dosed one of my drinks… I was beaten badly, raped and I almost died of an overdose.  
-God!- whispered Dean that was bringing the coffee fro the four of them and placing it over the table- Did they get the guy?  
-No, they didn´t.- Gabe paused- the hospital called mom and dad, they were listed as my emergency contact. When they told them what had happened to me, they blamed me for it. I told them that it was not my fault that the police would caught the guy, he was the one that had raped me. Mother said and I quote “ Don´t be absurd Gabriel, a man cannot get raped”   
-Gabe- said Cass moving forward to hold his hand and that startled Gabe a little- you don´t have to tell us more if you don´t want to. I understand.  
-Don´t worry, it was almost two decades ago. I am good now- said Gabe.- Mother wanted to get me home, cover the whole thing, send me to another university far away from Stanford. I disagreed. I decided to give a statement and get that son of a bitch into jail. They got DNA that ended up matching other rape victims DNA but they never found the guy. Mother ordered me not to go to the police, not to make it public because that would be a shame for the family. I did what I considered needed to be done and I never went back home. They never came for me either.  
-Yeah that sounds like the Novaks I know- said Dean bitterly.  
-I appreciate you coming here to see me, meet my family- said Cass- I have to warn you, the Novaks are at war. They know now that I am back here to stay and they had gone nuts- Said Cass getting his cup of coffee- oH! And Gabe you should know, Luke is back too.  
-What?- asked Gabe in disbelief- really? He is back from Rome?  
-Yes, now he preaches here- said Cass  
-If you can call that preaching!- said Sam- he is a prejudiced SOB with a podium and a microphone to rant against homosexuality, woman rights, free will …   
-Yeah that sounds like the Luke I remember. How nice is to see that all those years in Vatican city had not been in vain- said Gabe  
-Well, Sam will show you to your room, you can unpack, the fresh towels are over your bed in case you want to take a shower. Dinner will be in two hours- said Dean standing up and they all mirrored him- I have to run to the station to make sure I check on the unit that went to the training in the city today, I will be back for dinner babe- said Dean giving Cass a kiss square in the lips while humming and “I love you” and leaving the house.  
-He seems nice- said Gabe looking back at Cass  
-He is more than nice. He is a great man and a wonderful husband- said Cass- I am a lucky man  
-Glad you are happy Cass, I will head upstairs, the idea of a shower agrees with me, long day flying around. But I would love to heat how you and Dean met and everything else!- Cass smiles at Gabe´s enthusiasm and he starts dinner.   
He told Gabe about Dean, about their life before and after moving to California. He showed him his art and took him to his studio in the green house, Gabriel told him about his job, he finished his studies in Marine Biology and now he was the CEO of a small startup specialized in fighting marine pollution. Castiel was amazed, he asked a million question about his life and he realized he like the person Gabriel had turned to be.  
-So no girlfriend or wife?- asked Cass  
-Well, I tried dating some girls, didn´t work out that much. I was quite unstable for a while. Therapy helped a lot. We analyses very seriously why all my relationships were failing and I ended up admitting to myself that I liked man- Gabe looked at Cass looking for understanding- but… that made it even more complicated.  
-With our family education, realizing you are gay is not easy- admitted Cass- there was a lot of guilt for me. I just loved Dean so much that I couldn´t understand how such strong and pure love could be a sin.  
-Yeah, that was also true but with what happened to me …- Gabe paused a little and breathed slowly- being raped by another man… kid of made it very difficult to me to trust another man in an intimate way.  
-Oh I see- said Cass understanding his brother. Cass decided to hug him- you will find someone that will be worth that trust.   
-Thanks brother- Gabe high him very tight- I truly missed having a brother to talk to- and then Cass realized that Gabe was crying and he cried with him too. They stayed enveloped into each other arms until they calmed down and regained control.  
-I missed you too Gabe. Apart from Dean´s family I had nobody else. Coming over here was a risk for me, a personal nightmare. I felt safe in California, far from them. I hate to give them so much power over me but I cannot stop it. But coming here and recovering Anna and you in my life… well it means a lot to me.  
-I share the sentiment Cassie! – Gabe said smiling widely- Now tell me all about your wedding? Do you have pictures? Please tell me you have pictures!  
-Yes Gabe, I will show you, let´s get back inside and see if Sam needs help with dinner and maybe you will get to meet John- said Cass and when looking at his brother´s confusion he clarified- he is Dean and Sam´s dad, he is sick, lung cancer. He is the reason why we moved back here. He needs the family close.  
-Oh I see. Is he doing alright? I mean I am sure he had good docs but my best friend is an oncologist in California and maybe if he needs a second opinion I could call him and ask a favour- said Gabe  
-Thanks for offering- said Dean behind them, they both turned around to the unexpected company- sorry I didn´t mean to eardrop on you guys. Sam sent me, dinner is ready.  
-No worries Dean, you are Cassie´s family so you are my family. Whatever you need.- said Gabriel- now let´s see if your freakingly tall brother knows his way around the stove…- Gabe leaded the way and Cass and Dean interchanged a quick kiss.

Diner was great, John made a brief appearance and went back to bed. Cass and Dean decided to head to bed too while Sam offered to do the dished and Gabe insisted on helping.  
-So, Cass said you own a company- said Sam- he said something about saving the world from pollution, do you mind telling me what you do for a living?-asked Sam  
-Well our company is working on developing technology and methods to detect new chemicals and substances in the marine environment that can be causing problems.  
-Sounds very interesting- said Sam while checking Gabriel out. Damm he was attractive and he seems such a great guy, funny, stable, bright, brave….  
-And you?- asked Gabe  
-Well highschool teacher… nothing fancy- said Sam  
-Oh well shaping the minds of future generations … I wouldn´t say nothing fancy- insisted Gabe- and on your free time any hobbies?  
-Well I ... like to run in the mornings, I like to cook, …- started Sam hesitatingly  
-Oh c´mon that is boring! Tell me something you like to do and nobody knows about- said Gabe getting closer to Sam and looking upwards due to the difference in height  
-Well… I ..I – Sam was uncoherent because having Gabe that close was making him nervous- I write poetry.  
-Poetry? Wow that is amazing. Maybe you would like to let me read something one day?- said Gabe and that made Sam blush. He stepped backwards getting away from Sam but he grabbed him by his arm and pushed him flush into his arms.  
-Don´t you think you will get out of this … how about you Gabe? Tell me something you like that nobody knows about …- Sam said  
-I like …. I like you- said Gabe. Sam dropped a sweet kiss on his lips. Despite the difference in height it felt natural and comfortable. Sam´s body tingled with excitement.  
-I like you too. Good night Gabe- said Sam getting out of the kitchen and upstairs.

No need to say that both Sam and Gabe had a lot to think about once they got into bed and tuned the lights off. On the other room, Cass and Dean wear still awake after a nice round of sex. Lying into each other´s arms was heaven.  
-I know this might not be the time to have this conversation Cass but … I have been thinking a lot about the topic of having kids…- said Dean. That made Cass move his head up from the pillow and look at Dean  
-Do you want to have a baby? Here?- asked Cass  
-Tell me what you think, please- asked Dean- I would like to know …  
-I don´t know how I feel about having a baby here, I want kids Dean, I want them with you. I would love to have your dad and Sam around our kids so they have a family to rely on but… my family is in this town too.  
-Yeah.  
-Yeah- agreed Cass- kiss me? Dean obliged and he covered Cass body with his and his hands were around his husband´s body  
-Do you want to hear something stupid?- asked Dean, Cass nodded- When Oscar and Anna told us that they were pregnant I wished I could…. We could have one just like them. Ours, both of us.   
-I love you babe- said Cass kissing him back and dropping his hand to grab Dean´s cock- why don´t you make love to me this time and we use our weekend to really think about possibilities.  
-You … do you mean you would be willing?- said Dean  
-Of course Dean, you would be the most wonderful dad I can imagine. I would love to be by your side in each step. I love you more than anything in the world- Cass said and moved over Dean with the intention of prepping himself for Dean.


	12. Novaks turmoil

Yeah so everyone with Novak in their surname was going crazy. Cass was still divided between how much he wanted a baby with Dean and how much he hated the idea of having his baby growing up nearby his parents and siblings. Annael shared his fears but she also was giving him hope because seeing how that baby was growing inside her, how much he loved their baby was making him go soft. Finally one afternoon instead of going home from Anna´s house he went to the station.  
-Hello can I help you?- said the woman at the reception desk eying Cass with attitude  
-I am here to see the sheriff- said Cass  
-Do you have an appointment?- asked the woman. Cass looked at her and thought is this woman for real? Doesn´t she know who I am?  
-Oh no sorry, I just need to speak with my husband- said Cass trying to be nice  
-He is busy- she said  
-I understand, just tell him I am here and I will wait- said Cass sitting down in the waiting area. After 30 minutes, Cass was getting uneasy. Maybe he should be getting home… but a familiar voice startled him.  
-Castiel?- said Jody- Is everything alright? What are you doing here?  
-Dean is busy I was just waiting for him- said Cass  
-I doubt that Dean is every busy enough not to have some minutes for you. Please come on in!- said Jody- Charlene, is Dean in a meeting?  
-I don´t know- she said   
-What do you mean you don´t know? Didn´t you tell Dean that I was here?- asked Cass  
-I told you he was busy- Charlene stated  
-But you had me here waiting for almost 45 minutes now!- complained Cass with awe  
-And you could have waited for ever if I care …- said Charlene with an angry tone- you have no business coming over here!  
-Charlene!- complained Jody- this is out of place! You don´t let a officer family member wait outside!   
-He is nobody´s family- said Charlene  
-Dean is my husband!- Cass complained  
-Not in the eyes of god he is not!- said Charlene- Dean is a good man, you should stop pushing him down this perverted path, you will condemn his soul to hell- Cass felt like he was slapped in the face, his eyes opened in surprise with the understanding that surely she was attending his brother´s sermons. But he was even more surprised when he looked up and saw Dean standing behind Charlene at the door with a furious expression.  
-Charlene!- said Dean with a tense tone- I want to see you in my office right now- she stood up proudly and got in heading towards the office- Hey love!- Dean hugged Cass- I am sorry for that, it won´t happen again. Thanks Jody- said Dean holding the door open for everyone to get in. Dean ordered everyone to gather in the meeting room included Charlene and Cass.  
-If any of your family members was in danger, or assaulted I would be there for you. Any of you. I wouldn´t ask if you like me, I wouldn´t care if you did or not, I wouldn´t mind what church you attend- he eyed Charlene directly- I would be the first one there to help. Charlene, my husband came here to see me, It might have been a family emergency what did you know! You mock him, made him wait at the door and never told me he was waiting for me! When a family member calls or comes here, you know the protocol!  
-He is not…- started Charlene  
-Shut up- said Dean- shut up before I you said something might make me fire you after all these years of service!- Charlene froze- I don´t fucking care what you asshole preacher told you and honestly I don´t fucking care! But I am going to remind you Charlene that here, we are not in church, we are the law. And the law says my marriage is legal, thanks to congress it is legal all over the US- Dean´s tone was now high, he was angry- so if you cannot treat my husband with respect like any other citizen like it is you job, then let me know and I will find someone that will.  
-Yes sheriff- said Charlene- can I go back to the front desk  
-Yes, of course- said Dean more calmed- Charlene, wouldn´t you know anything about the letters and the vandalizing right?- Her eyes opened wide like a deer caught in the light of a very fast and big truck. Everyone whispered with annoyance, Dean sighted- now you need to go to my office. Jody can you call one of the freshman and ask them to cover the front desk today?  
-Yes boss- She said and before leaving she palmed Cass´s shoulder in reassurance.  
-I better go- said Cass- I shouldn´t have come- he was sad  
-Hey- said Dean getting to him and stopping him from leaving- are you alright? You came all the way here to see me- asked Dean- and I was so happy when I got out the door and you were there! That was until I heard what Charlene was saying- Dean hugged Cass and he melted in the embrace.  
-Sorry I cause all this turmoil- said Cass- I know you are not coming home for dinner tonight but I thought I could stop by and that we could have a quick dinner together just the two of us.- Dean smiled and his eyes sparkled, he dropped a kiss on his lips.  
-I would have loved to- said Dean but then he eyed to his office to Charlene that was sitting in there- but now I need to see about this and maybe even fire her… dam- he said like a whisper.  
-Wake me up when you get home?- asked Cass cupping his face an placing a sweet kiss on his husband´s lips- I love you  
-I love you more!- said Dean kissing him back.  
Then he went into his office and closed the door. He asked Charlene what she knew about the threats and letter … the vandalized cars … and she confessed that she knew about it from church, that there was a very hardcore group of people that was very openly disgusted by the sheriff and his personal life. She said the names of those who bragged about the vandalism against the police office and Dean sent her home, her punishment should have been losing her job but Dean didn´t want that, so he gave her a second chance. He sent her home suspended of job and salary for the rest of the week and told her to come back on Monday.  
-If you want to work here you might need to separate your personal belief from the letter of the law in the cases where they don´t agree- said Dean.  
-Why don´t you get me fired?- asked Charlene  
-You are a good woman, you are very wrong about me and Cass. He is my salvation not my damnation. My dad drank too much, he treated us quite bad, mostly me. You have no idea how many times I considered that maybe it would have been better for all if I was not there- Charlene looked at him with a frown- I didn´t do it because of Sam, he needed me. But I kept thinking about it because I thought I didn´t deserved to be alive, to be loved. And one day I met Cass, since that day I never considered that again. He saved me. He helped Sam get his degree, he supported me during my worst days at the FBI, when I got injured, he welcomed my dad back in our life even after he didn´t deserved it. He pushed me to come back here when we knew he had cancer and he takes such good care of my dad you cannot even imagine.  
-I had no idea- whispered Charlene.  
-Yeah, Cass is not the kind of guy that goes bragging about what he does- Dean sat next to her- I went home one day and I found Cass and dad in the downstairs bathroom. My dad was having a bad round of chemo, he was vomiting the few food he had been able to get in and he felt terrible. Cass was by his side on the floor, with a wet cloth helping him clean up, he had put a blanket around my dad because he is so skinny now that he is always cold. Do you think a soul like him will get into hell? If there is a god, who do you think he will condemn?, the ones that expend their time spreading hate, encouraging vandalism… or someone like Cass and me, which our only sin according to you is loving each other… you are not a bad person Charlene, you are just listening to the wrong people. Go home, I will see you on Monday.  
-Thank you Dean, I will see you on Monday- said Charlene leaving but then she turned around and said- please, can you tell your husband that I am sorry for the way I treated him. Whatever I might believe in about homosexuality is not the point, I should have remembered to “Love your neighbour as yourself” Mark 12:31   
-I will tell him, thank you Charlene- said Dean waving her goodbye and sitting back in his office. Dammed day. He ordered some take out and called some officers to start the meeting about the cold cases that was starting late due to the afternoon events. They were making progress but he didn´t like the directions the investigation was taking. He also gathered a couple of people to look into the names Charlene gave him about the vandalism. He wanted to go home so badly.  
When he finally got home, it was almost midnight, he got upstairs and slowly got into the bedroom, Cass was not there. He got a shower and slipped into comfy sweatpants and t-shirt, went downstairs to see if his husband was in there somewhere. There was post-it in the fridge “I baked pie, it is in the oven. Greenhouse” Dean got a slice of pie and a fork into a place and headed to the greenhouse to find Cass painting. He was breath-taking. He was wearing only jeans that hanged precariously on his lower hips and no t-shirt. His muscles and sculpted torso was so sexy that Dean´s hear was skipping bits, he was so focused and his movements were so precise that Dean didn´t want to say a words to break the spell, he leaned at the door and ate his pie. It was the noise of the fork in the plate that told Cass he was not alone.  
-Welcome home- said Cass without turning around.  
-What did I do to deserved home backed pie?- said Dean  
-Standing up for me in front of all your colleagues? – said Cass putting the brush down and cleaning his hands while approaching Dean- sorry I caused all that trouble- Cass kissed him- umm you taste good  
-It is the pie- said Dean  
-Pie? I didn´t notice!- said Cass kissing him again. Dean enveloped his husband with his arms and pulled him close- you smell nice too. I am all dirty and sweaty  
-Oh yes you are- said Dean putting the pie aside and making Cass move backwards from the door and back to the big table. The door closed behind.  
-Dean- whispered Cass blind with desire- I have been working here for hours, I am sweaty and smelly let me take a shower first…  
-You don´t know what is does to me to see you like this? All sexy and sweaty, concentrated in your job! The minute I saw you, I wanted you naked.  
-What are you waiting for then!- suggested Cass. Dean´s hands were already at the waist of his pants, unbuttoning the jeans and undoing the zip. Suddenly, Dean stopped and looked at him in awe  
-Commando? ummmm - Dean launched at him and ravished his mouth, Cass moaned under his touch. Dean dropped to his knees and got Cass´s length on his mouth, that made Cass drop a loud moan- be noisy for me babe, nobody will hear us here and I miss hearing you moan…  
-Dean, dean …. Oh babe you are so good…. Oh god please!- said Cass when Dean slipped one finger over his hole- do you have lube here?- Cass looked at him and smiled with a mischievous expression  
-I have Vaseline- said Cass winking and Dean let a loud laugh while using the Vaseline to coat his fingers before sliding them into Cass. Cass let his head fall backwards with the pleasure- Oh fuck fuck Dean right there!- He was bucking his hips and rolling them on Dean´s fingers- oh babe! please please Dean....  
-Tssss I got you babe, I am going to make love to you now- Dean used his arm to wide to the side all the drawings and sketches over the table making room for Cass. He moved him into the table and on his back. The height was perfect, his hole was just there in front of his swollen dick waiting to be filled. Dean used more Vaseline to coat himself and slid right in smoothly. Cass let his husband fuck him, his legs over his shoulders and the penetration was deep with every thrust, he got his own erection in hand, and pressed at the base to hold his orgasm a little but Dean´s loud moaning and the brush of his prostate with every thrust made him loose control and pumped his cock fast with the trusts until he cummed all over his own belly just a couple of thrusts before he felt Dean going rigid and cumming inside him with a loud groan.  
-wow Dean- whispered Cass- I missed this!- he hugged his husband tight but the sound of breaking glass startled them.-What was that?- asked worried  
\- Get dressed- said Dean jumping from his embrace getting into his boxers and sweats and running barefoot to the house- Stay in the greenhouse Cass- he said but the sudden smell of something burning made him move forward and follow Dean into the house. Dean and Cass checked out the house but the smell was getting more powerful. The heard a truck speed in the neighborhood and they went outside through the front door  
-Noooooo no no noooo!- Cass heard Dean scream even before seeing what was burning he knew it, somebody had torched the Impala and when he saw Sam running down the stairs he yelled him to called 911. He ripped the fire extinguisher form the kitchen sink and run towards Dean. They tried to put the fire out but it was out of control. Cass held Dean back when the extinguisher ran empty too soon and they fire went wild. Dean was cursing rabid. There were neighbors coming out of the houses to help with their extinguishers to help prevent the car from exploding. They heard the fire truck coming also the police.  
It took a moment for the fireman to put the fire down. Luckily their work to keep the fire under control had prevented the fuel tank from blowing up. Dean´s beloved impala was sitting there burned almost to the ground.   
-Are you all alright Dean?- asked Oscar that was on patrol tonight.  
-They destroyed my car, sons of bitches!- cursed Dean and turned around to check if Cass was alright. When he turned he saw his husband´s contorted face and turned again to look into the same direction to see what was going on- Oh god!- he gasped when he saw the front of the house trashed with spray paint “Burn in hell fags” in the front door.  
-I will take pictures of this all, Dean, we should see if we can find those on the list and get them to the station to interrogate.- said Oscar.  
-Yeah, this is escalating. Do it and call me, I want to be there- said Dean- I need to be with my family now, get a patrol to sit in my neighborhood in the morning just in case- He moved towards Cass and held him close. Sam and his dad were there too. The four of them looked at the house and finally decided to get in and try calm down.


	13. No Novaks in the house

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well as you might notice I changed the format. Some people suggested I was doing this all wrong and I am trying to make it better.  
> You will tell me what else should I do in order to keep improving. Cheers.
> 
> I will slowly re-edit all the previous chapters to match this new format but "Be patient my fiends"

The week was really crazy, John had appointments and tests to see if the cancer had stopped spreading or not, news were not good. The cancer was now more spread than before and John felt like all that suffering was pointless. His sickness make him miserable, him being sick made Dean and Cass move back home and now they were miserable too and their lives were in danger. He felt like all that was pointless. He was about to give up and Cass didn´t know what to tell him to make it better. He was going through a lot too. Every minute he was away from Dean he worried, worried that he was not going to come back, worried that his family is going to show up and even walking down the street he inevitably worries that a group of people will just jump him in some alley and beat him to death like it happened to those kids 12 years ago. He also worried about what would happen to Dean if he lost his dad, he knew how it felt to not have a father even though his was alive and living in town but Dean was getting close to his dad again, their relationship was now closer than ever and losing him now when they are just getting to the good part is unfair. Sam worked the minimum and tried to get home as soon as possible, he felt like he should be there to make sure those crazies never get close to his family, but he felt useless. He and Gabe had been in touch by phone and talking to him made him feel better, he was really good at listening and cheering him up. Today when he got home, he opened the door and heard a nice conversation coming from the livingroom, Cass and dad were sitting there drinking tea. Cass smiled at Sam.  
“It smells wonderful” said Sam “is Dean home early?” asked Sam hearing someone working in the kitchen.  
“Go see by yourself” said Cass quizzically and smiled even more. Sam was intrigued and when entering the kitchen he was surprised to see Gabriel wearing an apron and making chicken casserole and broccoli.  
“Gabriel!” Sam said making the other man turn around surprised “what are you doing here?”  
“Well, you told me all that happened, Cass told me how bad he has been felling so I thought you all needed some help and I took some time off from work, moved here for the summer”  
“Really? All summer?” said Sam with a bright smile.  
“All summer, all yours” said Gabriel with a goofy smile “will you kiss me?”  
“Well yes!, You deserve it” said Sam approaching the man and planting a soft loving kiss on his lips. Their height difference was impressive. Gabe smiled into the kiss and held Sam around his waist looking up to him to kiss him once more.  
“Hey! Hands off” said John entering the kitchen and that made Sam jump “you Novaks! He was my straight son Gabriel!” said John “it surely looks like I am never getting a daughter in law…”  
“John c´mon…” said Cass “let them be, they are just figuring things out” said Cass with an amused voice and John made a funny face that reminded him of Dean.  
“Castiel you better tell your brother that he better take good care of my kid or I will shoot him!” said John while Cass helped him to the couch again.  
“Easy there!” said Gabriel realizing that Sam was still freaked by his dad comments “He is cool with us, he opened the door today and he sat me down on the couch to give me a speech about not hurting his kid´s feelings and not to play with you. He didn´t once said anything out of place. At all” Sam relaxed finally in Gabriel´s arms.  
“Yeah I knew he had accepted Dean and Cass´s relationship but… I thought that he would be pissed to know about me” said Sam  
“He just wants you to be happy. So do I” said Gabe he was about to kiss him but the front door opened and they heard Dean´s voice.  
“Umm hello dad, hello love it smells wonderful what are you cooking?” asked Dean  
“Chicken casserole Dean” said Gabe entering the livingroom holding hands with Sam  
“Gabe! Nice to see you man” Dean hugged him “what are you doing here?”  
“Well, Sam told me about the car” Gabe saw Dean´s face flinch “I am sorry Dean, she was a beauty. Cass told me about the threats and my crazy family, your dad´s tests results … I thought you were having a shitting moment and needed some pick me up time. So, this is what is going to happen” all the others looked at him wondering what was he talking about “I called a friend, he is coming tomorrow with a tow and he will take your car to their garage, they are really good at restoring classics, he will take care of your baby and make her like she was”  
“But that will cost a lot Gabe I cannot afford it, we are saving money for far more important things” said Dean looking at Cass.  
“He owes me, trust me. You will pay almost nothing” said Gabe and Dean looked at him wondering what kind of favors did he owed him …” C´mon sheriff, nothing illegal Dean´O, five years ago I saved his little sister´s life, he owes me big time. Ok, next thing that I am trying to get done is getting my friend Charlie, she is an amazing oncologist in California. She is already having a look at John´s files and test results, I would like her to treat John is she thinks there is a better option than the one he has right now”  
“All you need Gabe, please make it happen” said Sam  
“I´ll do my best. Meanwhile I will be here so Cass would finish his set of paintings and sculptures on time for the exhibit” said Gabe winking at Cass who looked at him annoyed.  
“Exhibit? What exhibit?” asked Dean confused looking at Cass  
“I didn´t tell you because with all that has been going on, the last thing we need is me exhibiting my work downtown where all the crazies would come to trash it” said Cass  
“Babe, your work is important, very important” said Dean a little annoyed about not having realized how much pressure he was putting on his husband´s shoulders “So, did they call you?”  
“Yeah, your friend´s sister. She called and I invited her over, showed her what I was doing and she loved it. She arranged a weekend that the gallery was free to invite me to exhibit my work, but I declined” said Cass “It was not the time”  
“Well I called her today and told her that you had changed your mind” said Gabe “ I am sorry for the meddling in your lives guys, but honestly … you need to regain control of your lives, this mess is dragging you all against your will to a very dark place” said Gabe cautiously “Cass is always telling me how much you guys loved each other but, Sam has been telling me that you have been distant and arguing a lot in the last two weeks” Cass and Dean looked at each other with sorrow in their eyes. Dean tended a hand to his husband and he took it warmly into his hands as a silent apology “The Novaks are getting what they wanted, they wanted to see you fail, leave, grow apart. You need to rise up, smile, be happy, live! Show them that you are not fading away, not leaving” continued Gabriel more sure that this was the right thing to do. He looked at his brother now “Cass you need to show them that they hold no power over you anymore!” finished Gabe quite proud of himself.  
“Alright” said Cass “you are right Gabriel... Dean …” said Cass like a sight “they called from the adoption agency, they… they have a baby for us, they want to meet us on Monday. That is why I have been so snappy I am terrified and I didn´t want to tell you and I didn´t want to let the chance go either. So I have been a mess”  
“Babe” Dean walked to him, kneeled by him and held his hands “I am sorry I have been so distant. I am … I am pissed, so fucking pissed at all those assholes. They burned my car! Sprayed my house! Threatened my family! I am so fucking mad … I fear I will snap and loose it”  
“Hey Dean” said Sam “you are not alone in this. Look around, not all is on your shoulders”  
“Yeah son” said John “hold on alright? It is just a mess but we will get thought it together, all of us and Gabriel too apparently. Did you know that your brother and Gabriel …” John made a sex gesture with his hands, Cass bit his lip to contain a giggle.  
“Dad!” said Sam blushing hard. Gabriel laughed silently.  
“I suspected it dad” said Dean “Sam never said anything but … it was quite obvious they were into each other”  
“I remember quite vividly you telling me that your brother was straight and that homosexuality was not contagious” said John winking at Dean.  
“Well dad … what can I say” Dean looked at Sam that was mortified and red as a tomato “I might have been wrong!” and them Cass, John and Dean cracked up and laughed out loud for two whole minutes while Sam cursed loudly.  
“You are a bunch of assholes!” said Sam “you freaked me out for a minute. Dad… are you ok with this?” asked Sam pointing at Gabe  
“Yeah Sam, I even asked Cass to get his brother´s suitcase up to your room which is where I assume he will be sleeping” said John and that made both Sam and Gabe flinch a little “Lets have dinner. Let´s see if the other Novak knows how to cook”  
“There are no Novaks in this house at all John” explained Cass “Gabriel changed his surname to Milton a long time ago and I am very proud to be a Winchester” Cass kissed Dean lovingly.  
Food was amazing, they enjoyed a dinner in family for a minute they almost forgot all their problems and were happy. Once they all got behind the closed doors of their rooms nobody was asleep for a while.

Downstairs John thought about his wife Mary, how much he would love to have her here, their house full of people… looking at Sam smile at Gabe but mostly watching Dean fall in love over and over again with Cass reminded him of Mary. He also considered how much things had changed and how much they will change if Dean and Cass became parents. He would become a grandad and … ohh that made him feel a warm hope in his heart. He was somehow still learning to be a good dad... so John wondered how difficult would be to be a grandad.

Upstairs Dean and Cass were lying in their bed, curled into each other. They talked about the baby, where to put the crib, they things they needed to buy, they worried about the money and the family.. How they could do things from now on. The whispered about how exciting it was, how afraid they were, how everything was about to change and he slowly took each other´s clothes out like discovering the bodies for the first time.

Next door, Gabe and Sam were sitting in bed. They were barely looking at each other. It was Sam the first one that broke the silence.  
“You don´t have to worry about anything. I will sleep on the floor” said Sam  
“That will not be necessary Sam” said Gabe and leaned to kiss him. And damm that kiss was fantastic, Sam leaned into it and let Gabe take control of the situation “I like you a lot Sam and I feel like you are a good man, you care …”  
“Yeah I do care about you a lot Gabe” confessed Sam “you don´t need to talk about what happened but I heard enough when you told Cass, I would never want to make you feel bad or trigger any memories” Sam kissed him lovingly “But you should know I don´t know what I am doing here … never been with a man before”  
“Really?” Gabe was surprised “am I crossing a line here?  
“Well we are crossing some lines indeed” said Sam smiling “but I want to … with you” Sam kissed Gabe more heatedly and deeply, their tongues roamed together and their bodies sought all the possible friction, their hands mapped each other´s bodies and they slowly took their clothes out. Sam felt overwhelmed, he had never felt a muscular body like this against him, the manly hands, and the bulge against his leg…. He let a moan scape his lips and that only encouraged Gabe further. Gabe took his underwear off and felt Sam´s eyes on him  
“Do you like what you see?” asked Gabe with a sensual voice  
“I really really do” said Sam and he took his boxers off. Gabe was on him immediately. Man he was huge everywhere and Gabe licked his lips, he wanted him so damm much.  
“I wonder if you will be willing to let me do something for you” asked Gabe positioning himself between Sam´s legs and licking his lips again.  
“Oh god… what are you…” Sam´s breath was irregular seeing Gabriel kneel at his feet and grab his cock, Sam closed his eyes and he felt a warm lick along his length. He trembled.  
“Are you alright?” asked Gabe looking at him intensely  
“Please please…. Please keep going” begged Sam and Gabe took him in his mouth completely. Sam moaned loudly this time and Gabriel reminded him that he was being too loud and they were in his family home.

On the other side of the wall, Dean and Cass were too busy themselves to hear the moaning from the other side of the wall. Dean was face down on the mattress his feet on the floor and his legs spread. Cass was fucking him from behind into the mattress. Dean´s moans were muffled by the pillow he was brazing. He felt the amazing stretch of Cass´s cock fucking him hard, dragging along his prostate every now and then. He felt the friction of the bedsheet on his glans with every thrust of Cass. Oh god he was being fucked merciless and he loved every second of it. Cass was obviously trying to control his moans by kissing and biting on his neck and back but Dean felt he was getting close.   
“Make me scream babe” he whispered  
“Do you like this love?” asked Cass  
“Oh god yes!” said Dean with ragged moans when Cass sped up   
“Yeah I am close love, you are so perfect like this!” said Cass “can I fill you up Dean?”  
“ oh yes please…. Please cum in my ass” begged Dean with urgency in his voice feeling like Cass stilled deeply inside him and spilled inside.  
“Yessss!” moaned Cass biting his lip. He knew Dean was not done but he must be really close so Cass moved faster now, it was wet and sloppy he could feel all his own cum inside Dean, he focussed on his prostate and dived into it making Dean scream underneath him and making Dean cum untouched all over the side of the bed and on the floor. When Cass moved out of him his own cum slid off Dean and down his legs  
“That is a pretty view” said Cass making Dean stay still and kneeling between his husband´s legs he licked over his abused and messy hole. Dean trembled underneath him “you are perfect Dean, I love you”  
“I fucking love you angel” said Dean making Cass smile at the endearment.  
“I think we need a shower … there is cum everywhere” said Cass letting himself drop on the bed.  
“Yeah I feel sticky is all the weird places” said Dean kissing Cass´s shoulder and accommodating himself in his arms. And then they heard it, the mattress rhythmic noise, the muffled moaning coming from next door and they looked at each other wondering …  
“Do you think they will be ok?” asked Cass  
“They are figuring it out together … we did it, right?” asked Dean  
“We did more than alright” said Cass kissing Dean deeply and letting his hands roam along his husband´s perfect body. His hand stilled when he touched that scar on his ribs and Dean felt him flinch a little.  
“Hey! That was a long time ago Cass” said Dean kissing him slowly “I am here with you babe”  
“The threats awoke memories … old fears” confessed Cass. Dean stopped his ministrations to look his husband in the eye.  
“I am going nowhere. Not gonna leave you babe, I made you a promise in that hospital room” said Dean  
“I am afraid, that´s it. This place somehow feels like home and awakes the worst fears in me… I am not making any sense… sorry” Cass stood up and apologized. Dean enveloped his husband in his arms.  
“Don´t apologize for your feelings, they are as valid as anyone else´s. I am afraid for you too, all the time” Dean kissed him carefully and slowly. A knock from the other side of the room called their attention “ oh oh yes yes!!! Please please Gabe! Ohhhhhh”  
“Can we run to the shower and hope they would be done once we are back… it is kind of weird hearing them … you know” said Cass  
“ Sure love” said Dean putting on the boxers and grabbing some clean pajamas and towels

Sam was blissed out, the blowjob was amazing and he loved to see those amazing blue yes on him with that pretty mouth stretched around his member. Gabe made him almost orgasm but before he could let himself go, he was off with a loud pop.  
“Let me make love to you Sam” asked Gabe  
“Alright” said Sam looking a little afraid  
“There is nothing to be afraid of, I will open you up slowly and good and you can tell me to stop if something feels off or too much” said Gabe  
“OK, So what is next?” asked Sam.  
“Turn around, hands and knees” asked Gabe “ umm … you look beautiful Sam” He blushed wildly and thanked that Gabe couldn´t see how embarrassed and exposed he felt. Gabe kissed his lower back and lubed his fingers. Sam flinched when he felt the cold wetness of a lubed finger around his anus.  
“I have never….” said Sam trying to make Gabe understand.  
“Never fingered yourself?” Sam shook his head “I will make it extra good for you” and then Sam felt the lick over his hole and lost himself in the feeling. Gabriel licked and opened him with his tongue and fingers. Once he had two fingers inside Sam he urged him to sit on his fingers and fuck himself on them while he grabbed his cock in sleek hand making him cry of pleasure hitting his prostate. Oh god he love how he could tear apart a big man like that … dammit he loved Sam.  
“oh oh yes yes!!! Please please Gabe! Ohhhhhh” cried out Sam cumming all over Gabe´s fist.   
“You are beautiful like this, spent and covered in cum …”  
“Damm Gabe don’t say things like that” said Sam again blushing like a virginal teen “let me give you a hand?” said Sam looking at Gabe´s swollen dick. “Yes please…. Please touch me” asked Gabe while Sam was lying on the bed and dragging him onto him, draping those amazingly long fingers around his cock and encouraging him to fuck into his fist. The kissed and held each other until Gabe spilled between them. Sam cleaned them as good as possible with a t-shirt and he dragged Gabe into his arms, covered themselves with the duvet and feel asleep fast.

Family breakfast was busier than ever, Anna stopped by because the siblings were going shopping for the baby together, one the noisy and excited siblings left the house, Sam and Dean were left alone in the kitchen. Dean was sure Sam wanted to say something … so he cut in.  
“So .. you and Gabe are good?” asked breaking the ice. Sam smiled into his coffee and took a zip.  
“Yeah” he said taking his time “I … we did some things last night … that I had never done before”  
“Yeah … we heard” whispered Dean winking and making Sam blush.  
“Well I just wanted to thank you” said Sam and looking at Dean´s stunned expression he clarified “a while ago, when I asked you was it was like to… you know. Well you said something very useful, it helped me a lot to understand what I was feeling yesterday”  
“Oh” said Dean remembering what he had said “so you … did the thing?  
“Not all the way” said Sam “don´t misunderstand me I would have done it but I think Gabe was worried about pushing me too far … damm I sound like a teenager” Sam scolded himself  
“Nice of him” said Dean “I am glad he cares for you. It is not something you want to rush into, take your time”  
“I worry about what happened to him” said Sam baring his fears to his brother “it was a long time ago but … I could feel like he needed to be in charge because he didn´t trust otherwise”  
“You will need to talk this though with him. You need to know in which ways he will be comfortable to be touched and which ones are a no-no. For me and Cass it was gradual because we learned to do it all together. He was my first you probably remember but he was my first everything… I never let any woman touch me in any way”  
“Really, not even a handjob by those cheerleaders? Prom?” asked Sam confused.  
“Never more than a couple of heated kisses and some roaming hands” admitted Dean  
“I never thought you were so puritan? – said Sam “I mean you were in the team, you dated all the cheerleaders… you used to talk like you knew it all about girls and sex …”  
“Yeah yeah big mouth… all bullshit, I thought I needed to pretend. I was afraid that people would look at me and know…”  
“Know?” And then Sam realized “ahhh know you were gay…”  
“Yeah, I used to pretend to be … you know … well what it was expected of me, what dad expected me to be … some macho womanizer that played sports and was taught… being somebody I was not was slowly taking my life away… thanks god I met Cass otherwise who knows .. “ Dean had a broken voice he didn´t want to finish the sentence, because he knew the ending.   
“I never knew how much I hurt you son” said John entering the kitchen “sorry I didn´t mean to eardrop   
“Don’t worry dad” said Dean “long time ago… I am good now”  
“I don´t remember being more afraid in my whole life that the day your mother told me she was pregnant. I was so excited but damm terrified… they day you were born and I held you for the first time I realized I had so many ways to screw you up the way my old man did with me… I almost had a panic attack”  
“You never talk about him… How was he? Grandad?” asked Sam  
“He was old school, violent sometimes, he was not bad, he was brute and he drank a lot… when I remember him I mostly remember fearing him. When he died I think mom felt relieved. I was terrified I would turn into him” John looked at them and he was obviously troubled “I had your mom and she … helped me” his voice cracked when he mentioned her.  
“Dad, You don´t need to …” said Dean walking to him and grabbing his hand. John held his hand back  
“When she died I blamed myself for not being here… I couldn´t save her. And instead of focussing on you both… I … every time I saw you It reminded me that she was gone and that I would be alone the rest of my life. I used to cuddle with you both at night but … that only made it worse. I hit rock bottom on our wedding anniversary. I was in the garage with a gun to my head when they called from school …” Dean was taken aback, that was a hell of a confession.   
“Dad…” whispered Sam not knowing what else to say.  
“Dean had broken his leg and he was at the hospital” said John “I went to pick him up, he looks so much like Mary … I brought him home. Hired Marietta the next day to watch over you while I was at work and decided to distance myself from you both to try regain my sanity…. At some point I became the only kind of father I knew by default. I became what I hated the most, I became my dad” John looked at Dean and he felt the tears fall down his face, Dean hugged him strongly “I am so sorry Dean… I am sorry I wasn’t there for you both”  
“You did the best you could” said Sam sitting by them “listen, we never lacked anything, you fed us, took us to school and kept us safe. Look at us, we ended up good. A cop and a teacher and both happy and here living with you. Once again you gave us a roof. We ended up ok right?”  
“More than Ok” said John “but that was despite me, not thanks to me… But after all this years I just want you both to know that I believe your mother would be very proud of the man you have become and Dean, you don´t have to pretend being anything, you are already strong and brave, you take such good care of all of us, you are not afraid to stand up for Cass, you never were. You will be a good dad”  
“Well it helps I have you all around. Good dad in training will need help from Uncle Sam and grandpa to get his shit together at the panic moments alright?” said Dean “now, less feelings chit chat and more coffee. I need to wake up my brain and get to a meeting”.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well as you might notice I changed the format. Some people suggested I was doing this all wrong and I am trying to make it better.  
> You will tell me what else should I do in order to keep improving. Cheers  
> I will slowly re-edit all the previous chapters to match this new format but "Be patient my fiends"


	14. The brightest star and the darkest of nights

Life has been good that week thanks to Gabriel´s presence. Dean was working and less worried now that Cass was not alone at home. Sam was happy. Castiel had been finishing his items for the exposition and it was all done, he was proud and that made Dean happy. John was still a little depressed but Gabriel´s friend would be flying over the following week to have a look at him in person and tell him about options for his treatments, so at least there was some hope. But all that Dean and Cass could think about was that interview on Monday.  
Once they got there, things went smoothly than they had ever expected. They did have a baby for them, she was 16 weeks old and her mother who was underage had signed off her parenting rights. The social services local agent would like to visit their home prior to signing on for the adoption to start walking towards being official, which would take approximately six to eight months, during that period Dean and Cass would be under the scrutiny of ss to make sure it was the best home for the baby. If the home agreed with the SS standards, the little girl could go home with them in two to three days.  
So then Cass and Dean went shopping, got all the stuff they could think the baby might possibly need and some more. Heading home with the car full of bag and boxes, and more to be delivered straight home they felt happy, like nothing would possibly cloud their happiness. Their family was happy too, they heard the news and made a good effort for them to get the home ready for baby Mary . There was a little office upstairs across the hall from the bathroom that was being used as a storage room. Sam and Gabe got all the boxes to the garage and Cass and Dean cleaned the room thoroughly and decided how to paint it. Dean wanted it pink but Cass argued insensibly for some gender neutral colours and won the battle easily. Green tones were chosen and in the afternoon Cass painted the room and sketched some animals on the wall. When Dean saw it, he agreed that it was beautiful and that baby Mary was going to be very happy there. Cass got soft white curtains and they assembled the crib and the armories. There was also a rocking chair by the window. A whole day of intensive work left the house pristine, in order and baby ready. The social security officer was a nice woman call Missury Moosely, very short african-american woman with inquisitive eyes and incisive intellect who asked a million questions and ended up being surprised about Dean and Cass relationship. Convinced that the house and the people living in it was a good place, she signed on the paperwork and Dean and Cass finally got to be parents.  
They had an appointment at the SS agency in the city to pick up Mary. She was a rosy looking beauty, with big hazel eyes and funny shaped brown hair. She was looking at them silently and didn´t shed a tear, not even when Dean and Cass held her for the first time. After a couple of hours and some paperwork, Dean and Cass secured baby Mary in her seat and drove home, where Sam, John and Gabe expected them nervously.  
“We are home!, the three of us!” said Dean happily  
“Where is she?” asked Sam excitedly  
“She fell asleep in the car” explained Dean “she is perfect Sam…” Sam hugged Dean tightly “Congrats Dean, you deserve this, I am so happy” said Sam  
“Easy there Uncle Sam, you don´t get to be the favorite uncle…” said Gabe entering the room with a goofy smile and a hug for Dean .  
“That is to be seen…” said Sam in retaliation but suddenly they went silent when they saw Cass enter the room with the baby in his arms. She was happily asleep. They all looked at her in adoration.  
“It took me a while to figure it out how to take her out of the car seat without waking her up…” said Cass shyly without taking his eyes from her. “I am going to check on John and makes sure he sees her before I put her in the crib” and once said, Cass walked towards John´s room and he introduced baby Mary and her grandad. John had cried like a baby and that had Cass going soft. He padded John softly with a smile and told him to try rest a little before dinner, so he would feel strong enough to join them and hold Mary.  
Ten minutes later all four man were standing in Mary´s nursery, looking at the rosy baby sleeping in there. They were silent, Dean had Cass in his arms and Sam would swear that they were shinning. He had only seen them like this on their wedding day. They were finally a family. Later that afternoon, a very pregnant Anna and her husband Oscar came to meet Mary. Dean had never seen Cass happier in his whole life. Mary was the brightest star in the sky and she had them all under her spell.  
By mid afternoon Mary woke up and the grumpiness started. Luckily for Cass and Dean there were tons of volunteers to hold her and distract her while they prepared a bottle for the first time ever and discussed if it was too hot or not. Finally when everything was ready a very fussy baby girl was place on Dean´s arms and he fed her for the first time while looked at him adoringly.  
“They are so sweet that I might get diabetes…” said Gabriel to Sam who agreed silently “See how they have been looking to each other and Mary… this is the happiest moment ever”  
“I am very happy and I am just an uncle!” said Sam “Can you imagine what it might feel like becoming a parent?”  
“Do you ever consider kids?” asked Gabe and Sam without looking him in the eye  
“I don´t know… I guess. I mean I like kids, I just never considered it for real because I guess… I have never dated anyone seriously enough to even have this conversation” said Sam and felt Gabe flinch a little “Would you like to have kids?”  
“I always wanted to…” said Gabe this time looking at Sam. He looked at him and smiled softly dragging the short man towards him for a kiss. After that he went to check on john leaving Gabe there shaking a little and wondering if that kiss meant something else…

A full and happy baby was in everybody´s arms along the night. Family dinner was extra special. When John got to hold Mary it was specially endearing. He held her close, kiss her chubby cheeks and hummed some song to her until she fell asleep. Dean put her to bed and they finish dinner while keeping an eye on the baby monitor. When finally the day was over, Dean and Cass found each other on the nursery again, looking at Mary.  
“What a day” said Dean hugging Cass from behind?  
“I feel bad for going to bed and leaving her here alone, I know it is stupid but… when I don´t see her it feels like…” Cass didn´t know how to explain  
“It feels like she is not here jet?” Dean finished the sentence for him  
“Yeah… stupid right?” said Cass melting in Dean´s embrace  
“She is here to stay Cass, we love her so much already! But I get what you are talking about because I hate the idea of leaving for work tomorrow and not being here to hold her” Dean smiled and dragged silently Cass to bed.  
“I will send you pictures of her” said Cass before closing his eyes and falling asleep among Dean´s arms. A baby cry woke them up four hours later, Cass went over the nursery and changed her, once in her clean diaper he went downstairs and prepared a bottle, sat on the rocking chair in the nursery and fed her while talking to her almost on a whisper. “You are the most beautiful baby I have ever seen, I am sure you will be happy with us here, I am never going to stop loving you Mary” Cass rocked her and she fell asleep. A couple of minutes later, Cass sneaked back in bed and Dean wrapped his arms around him and dropped a kiss on his neck “Love you angel” he whispered in his sleep. Life was good.

Two days later, Dean was at work when they got a call. Oscar and Victor entered Dean´s office with serious faces. Dean wondered “Tell me” demanded Dean  
“We got a call there is a floater in the lake” said Oscar  
“Fuck! Do we know anything else?” Asked Dean  
“It is a man, not a jumper because there was an anonymous call of two man pushing a third one over the rails of the bridge” Continued Victor and that made Dean jump from his seat.  
“Call the forensic agents, we need to get that body out of the water with discretion. It is too early to have any missing person’s report, hopefully the face would be recognizable, any specifics?”  
“The person who called, a man we said that they were no kids, so I guess he wanted to say that this was no joke or prank, they were two man assaulting a third one, maybe even disposing of a body…”  
“This is fucked up, lets head there” said Dean and immediately reached his phone and dialed Cass´s number “Cass?..”  
“Hey Dean, it´s Sam Cass must have forgotten his phone home”   
“Wait, so Cass is not at home?” Dean flinched a little  
“No the lady from the Expo called him to ultimate some details so he went downtown a whole ago, by the way Cass said he would be back before Mary´s next bottle but it is almost time and she is getting cranky, should I feed her?” Indeed there were sounds of a cranky baby in the background  
“Sure, the doses are pre-calculated on the fridge and make sure the bottle is not too hot before feeding her. Once thing more Sam… How long it´s been Cass gone?”  
“I don´t know… a while actually since I arrived by 3…” Said Sam but sensing something weird on Dean´s voice he asked “Is everything alright?”  
“Yeah Sammy everything is alright. Please make sure you ask Cass to call me once he get home, as soon as he gets home please” Dean asked  
“C´mon Dean something is bothering you, is everything alright?” Sam insisted  
“Yeah Sam, I just worried when Cass drives downtown and doesn´t take his phone…” and it was true, what Dean didn´t say was that he worried even more when dead man appeared floating in lakes…  
“Oh! No, he didn´t drive downtown, he took his bike said he was going to ride along the lake …” Dean´s blood froze  
“alright …. Just make sure he calls me back please, I got to go” Dean hanged before Sam could notice his panic. He used google to get the phone number of the gallery.  
“Hello?” a warm female voice greeted him “Downtown lightshow gallery, how can I help you?”  
“Hello this is Dean Winchester, I was wondering is my husband Castiel was over there, he forgot his phone and I need to talk to him” Dean asked trying not to sound like a paranoid controlling husband.  
“Wait a second my boss is here, she had an appointment with Mr. Castiel Winchester but I am afraid he didn´t show…”  
“Dean? Is everything alright?” asked Marianne  
“Hi Marianne is Cass over there?” asked Dean while jumping in the car and driving towards the lake.  
“No Dean, he never showed I called him to his cell phone and he doesn´t answer, it is very weird, Cass is always very punctual”  
“He forgot his cell phone home, if he shows up, please tell him to call me ASAP, there is something that requires my attention, thanks Marianne” Dean said and he heard her answer “Of course Dean” and something else but he had already hanged.  
that was everything in his mind.  
Once he arrived to the scene, the body was already out of the water and covered with a sheet. There was a police cordon securing the area. Dean headed there, everyone looked at him with a weird face, Dean started to panic. The forensic walked towards him and stopped him. was the recurring idea in his mind.  
“Dean….the body has been seriously mutilated, there is no face to identify, but we got his wallet from his jacket…” The forensic guy was called Rufus, he was a tough big guy and he was now looking at Dean like a kicked puppy and showed him the wallet. Dean felt a pinch of panic.  
Dean´s eyes widened when he recognized the wallet and looked at the body under the banquet with fear. He took the wallet and opened it just to make sure, the first thing he saw was Cass´s id and a picture of him with Dean. “No….no no cannot be! Cas!!!! Oh god no…..” Dean rushed to the body but when he got there he panicked and stopped. If he saw who was lying underneath and was indeed his husband then what? What will he even do? He dropped to his knees and panicked. He reached to hold his hand, he could recognize his husbands red jacket and noticed how cold Castiel´s hand was. After a wave of tears spilled down his face he saw for a second the hand he was holding and, he realized those where not the hands of his husband.  
“Rufus!” Dean Called “He is not Castiel, He is not Cass I am sure. I know my husband. Please check his back, Cass has his back tattooed” Rufus did as Dean asked and the body had no tattoos in his back. Dean felt a wave of relief. But still where Cass was and why did the dead guy had his wallet and jacket?  
“Oscar, please call the hospitals and ask if there has been reported any injured person, any ambulance service with Cass´s description this afternoon” Dean stood up and tried to regain control. He rested his back towards his car and cleaned his face from the tears. “Rufus, take the body to the morgue and see if there is anything that can tell us who he might be” Dean had regained control for now. He called Gabriel, went to voice mail. Sam “Is Cass home?”  
“No Dean, please tell me what is going on?” demanded Sam worried.  
“Is Gabriel with you, I called him and it went straight to voice mail” asked Dean.  
“Yes, he is here” Sam said “ but Dean…”  
“Just hold on tight, I will call you back” said Dean and hanged. He wanted the line free in case Cass tried to call him… “Oscar! Can you check if by any chance Cass is with Anna… try not to worry her. I am already freaking out for all of us” Dean asked and Oscar called Anna and shook his head to tell Dean that Anna had not seen Cass today, he asked about the baby and informed her that there were onto something important and that he might arrive later than expected. “Sorry man” said Oscar after finishing the call. “What do we do?” he asked  
“No idea… Sam said he was riding his bike… I have a picture in my phone I will send it to you, tell everybody to keep an eye out for it, it might help us find Cass. I am going to follow his path from home all the way to the gallery that was where he was headed, that is the only thing we can do for now until we know more about what happened to our mystery floater”  
“I will keep you posted of any developments” said Oscar but then turned back to Dean again and put his hand over his shoulder and squeezed reassuringly “We will find him, we will”  
“Thanks Oscar, thanks…” Dean answered trying not to think about what if… they didn´t…  
Dean drove his car towards his house and then took the lake road slowly, checking everywhere, there was no bike, no Cass and no apparent sign of struggle… all the way to the Gallery. Feeling his strength fail, he decided to head towards the station to check on the other officers in patrol. Once he got there, the first thing he saw when entering the door was a very worried Sam and Gabriel holding baby Mary in their arms. Dean´s façade of control disappeared when he saw them and Sam immediately went to him and hugged him tightly “What is happening Dean, where is Cass?” asked Sam.  
“Nobody knows, he never made it to the gallery. A body was found floating in the lake he was wearing Cass´s jacked and his wallet was in his pocket… I went to identify the body, it was not Cass…” said Dean holding the tears.  
“Thanks god!” said Gabriel behind them, he was pale as a ghost “Did you cheeked hospitals….?”  
“Yeah, we did, we got nothing…” Said Dean reaching to hold baby Mary and kissing her lovingly “We will find dad, I promise you darling. We should get inside so I can check for last minute developments and then you need to head home” Sam and Gabriel were going to object but Dean cut them down “I need you there for two reasons, one Mary needs to get in bed eventually, she should already be bathed and fed with her pajamas on” Dean´s face flinched a little “Cass likes to give her the bath and …” his voice trembled and he held Mary closer until he regained control “On top of that I need you to tell me if he comes home, if he had some kind of accident he might be disoriented and eventually find his way home, I need somebody that is not dad to deal with any possible emergency” With that logic both Sam and Gabe agreed with the condition that Dean kill call in there is anything new.  
They were in his office when Victor knocked. Dean looked at him hopeful but he shook his head “No bike anywhere… we keep looking”  
“Dean I might have something!” said Charlene entering the office in a rush “There is a man in line 3 that he said he wanted to talk to you right now, he said he was Michael Novak” Dean and Gabe opened his eyes wide.   
“Michael? I am Dean Winchester” he said and he heard the line flutter before there was an answer “Dean, I found Castiel injured walking by the road. He is very disoriented but he refuses to go to the hospital. I am heading towards the station, I will be there in 5 but I wanted you to know he is safe and sound”   
“Oh thanks god! Where did you find him? We have been worried sick!” said Dean  
“By the railroad old stop, I stopped by the storage unit to get out the bikes for the kids and I was driving back home when I saw him, I am parking out front right now” said Michael and Dean forgot the phone and run out of the door towards that car. He saw a man that he barely recognized as Michael getting out of the car and running around to the passenger door. Dean got to the door and helped Michael move Cass out of the car “Call an ambulance right now Charlene!” Demanded Dean bringing Cass inside into the break room and lying him on the couch. He was covered in blood.  
Sam had Mary on their arms, Gabe helped them with Cass. He was semi-conscious and he was bleeding profusely. Dean checked where the blood was coming from and found that he had a nasty cut on the left side of his head, scratched hands and chin but not gunshots or knife wounds. “Cass? Can you hear me? Babe it´s me Dean…” asked Dean and Cass squeezed his hand and whispered “Dean… there was a guy and he hit me with a bat… took my bike.. I didn’t know where I was”  
“Fuck babe you worried me sick” Dean hugged him softly. Gabe got a wet towel to help clean the blood and soon the paramedics arrived to check on him and asked them to give them some space.  
Dean, Michael, Cass and Gabe and all the other officers waited outside the breakroom and Dean urged them to continue working. Soon only they were standing there. Mary started crying and Dean held her trying to sooth her.  
“Don´t worry baby, we will be home soon” said Dean to Mary, as soon as he held her she found comfort on his dad and stopped crying.  
“Is she your daughter?” asked Michael and Dean looked at him wondering what to think about him but he was grateful he had helped Cass so he answered “Yes, she is our daughter, her name is Mary”  
Dean saw something in Michael´s eyes but couldn´t say what it really was “Michael, I know we have never seen eye to eye but I want to thank you for helping Cass and bringing him here”  
“No need to thank me … I… I know I was very critic with your relationship and I know we hurt Cass by leaving him out of the family but it was for the better, trust me” said Michael and he seemed honestly worried  
“What do you mean?” asked Dean  
“Once Luke was back… things changed, the family changed” explained Michael without giving more information but added “Those who are out… it is better for them. Sometimes I thought about Gabriel and Cass out there, living their lives, being happy far from us… I am happy for them. I know you are back here because of your dad´s illness, I am sorry”  
“Thanks” Dean eyes Gabriel and saw him frowning and angry. He was going to explode soon.  
“Do you really think that we were better all alone? Out there not being able to even give your siblings a phone call?” Gabriel exploded and Michael turned to him not understanding.  
“Excuse me?” he said and Gabriel realized that his own brother, Michael did not recognized him at all. “You don´t even know who I am…” said Gabriel and that made Michael realize who he was talking with and his eyes opened widely with surprise  
“Gabriel? Is that you?” His face distorted in pain “You should get away, run far… don´t cross paths with Luke, go soon” and then he turned to Dean and tended a card to him “This is my phone number, I would appreciate if you could drop me a text and tell me how Cass is doing and … Dean, don´t tell anybody that I brought Cass here” Michael looked again to Mary and he touched her little hand “She is perfect” Michael said before leaving the room in a rush.   
Dean and Gabriel looked at each other but is was actually Sam the one that voiced the general feeling “What the fuck did just happened?” and the three of them shrunk their shoulders and wondered about Cass.  
He had a concussion and needed to head to the hospital for a CT scan and probably stay overnight to keep him under control, the other injuries were just minor scratches from falling to the ground. Dean sent Sam and Gabe home to take care of Mary and he rode in the ambulance with Cass. It was almost noon next day when Dean and Cass arrived home.  
“Where is Mary?” were the first words that Cass had spoken once arrived home.   
“She is sleeping with Gabe, they are both exhausted, we had a long night, she missed you guys” said Sam whose grey bags under his eyes pointed out he was telling the truth and probably needed a nap too “So glad that you are home Cass, we were very worried”  
“Thanks Sam” said Cass “I am going upstairs to have a shower but then I would like to have Mary with me” Dean helped him upstairs. He helped him undress and prepared a nice bath for Cass. His body was now covered in bruises making obvious how much pain he might be suffering right now. Dean helped him wash his hair and later made sure the wound was properly disinfected   
“Can I lay down now?” asked Cass “I want Mary”  
“I will help you in bed and I will go get Mary for you, promise” Dean lovingly helped Cass get into bed and under the covers and then headed to Sam and Gabe´s room to get the baby out from Gabriel´s embrace and into his husband´s arms.  
“My little princess, I am sorry I was away for so long” said Cass dropping a kiss on her forehead before closing his eyes. Dean sat down in the chair by the window looking at his husband and baby and realizing that for a long time the previous day he thought he would never have this again. He let himself cry and let out all the tension he had accumulated in the last 24 hours. Mary woke up and her soft cooing awake Cass, he saw Dean curled into the chair not too far from them he had fallen asleep with exhaustion. He was going to head downstairs when a soft knock was followed by Sam.  
“I will get many into a clean diaper and I will feed her” said Sam “You guys need the rest”  
“What time is it?” asked Cass quite disoriented  
“Four p.m. Are you hungry?”  
“No, maybe dinner but I don´t want anything now, thanks” Said Cass letting Sam get Mary “Cass you need to talk to Dean, there is a lot that happened while you were missing, it affected Dean a lot. He might not want to talk about it but needs it”  
“Alright?...” Cass agreed wondering what had happened while he was unconscious. Cass stop up from bed slowly, his body ached everywhere, he went to Dean and woke him up. Dean looked at him and let himself be coerced to get into bed and Cass laid down with him.  
“Yesterday was the worst darkest night of my life” said Dean holding Cass in his arms and kissing him softly while letting the tears run again “I had never been so scared”.


	15. Trust me, I love you.

“Tell me everything that happened” asked Cass and Dean frowned “All of it, I don´t need you to protect me alright, not from the truth at least”  
“You were not answering your phone, you were not home and never made it to the gallery. We had a call, a man was found dead in the lake…”  
“And you thought it was me? Oh Dean…” he realized how panicked Dean might have been.  
“Well I tried to be logical and not panic but when I got to the park … the body was mutilated before dumped in the lake from the bridge. No way we could do any facial recognition but when I got there… he was wearing your red jacket and your wallet was in his pocket…” Dean broke and started crying and Cass soothed him as best as possible while realizing that his husband thought for a while he had been murdered.  
“OMG! When did you realized it wasn´t me?” asked Cass once Dean calmed down a little  
“When I held your hand … well the dead´s man hand and I when I actually saw it I realized it wasn´t you. It was not your hand. I asked the forensic agent to check the tattoos and that gave them all confirmation”  
“He might have been the man who attached me… I was riding my bike and when I stopped to check the train tracks before crossing a guy stepped out from the middle of two containers and hit me with a baseball bat. The next thing I remembered was confusion, I was cold and lost and for a moment I don´t realize why I wasn’t in San Francisco… It was quite dark and for a minute I thought I saw my brother Michael…”  
“You did see Michael, he found you on the road and called me. He drove you to the station, he brought you back to me” said Dean and he sounded immensely grateful.  
“He did?” Castiel was shocked. His brother Michael helped him?  
“I think he cares about you but I think he is scared of Luc and what he could do if he knew he helped us… he also told Gabriel to go away, far from here that he will be safer. I am seriously concerned about this Cass… it was not just a coincidence that a man wearing your jacked and wallet, riding your bike and that he looked slightly like yourself got murdered…” Cass looked at him in fear and held tighter to Dean  
“So… you think they were there to murder me but they got that guy instead? “ asked Cass  
“I called my former team, they are coming over to help. I think this is all connected, the murders from 12 years ago, the threats, this murder… we have been extraordinarily lucky this time but we need to end this or we might run out of luck…” Dean sighted loudly “I am sorry I didn´t thought I would put us in this kind of danger by coming here…”  
“Hey! It was my choice as much as yours, don´t blame yourself Dean. I love you I would have go with you to hell if that was necessary” said Cass moving closer to his husband “I love you babe, I am really sorry that you had to live through something like that yesterday, but I am not going anywhere, I belong here by your side”  
“We would need to be extra careful Cass, I can´t lose you!”  
“You won´t” Cass kissed him and held him tight until a loud cry from downstairs made them realize of the time “Our little Mary is probably cranky and needs a bath” said Cass getting out of bed with a pained expression but happy voice “I am getting old, everything hurts”  
“Your body is full of bruises and scratches, take it easy alright? Don´t overdo it!, let go hug Mary” suggested Dean kissing him again and holding his hand reassuringly.

That late afternoon, Dean´s former FBI team arrived to the station and decided to stop by the house to talk to Dean. Sam saw the SUV park in the front and called Dean, everyone in the house gathered nervously. Dean considered how weird would be to face his team now that Benny was not there and he had left. It was weirder than expected when they opened the door and saw Rowena in her impolite fed suit with her amazing red hair.  
“Hello Dean” said Rowena  
“Hello… “ Dean looked at them all, all the same colleagues but her … he realized she was probably filling up for Benny, she was now head of the team “please come in, make yourselves comfortable” They all entered the house, they greeted Castiel and he introduced the rest of the family.   
“Do you guys want something to drink?” asked Sam politely  
“Coffee would be good Sam” said someone. Sam considered how much these people could know about them, well they worked by Dean´s side for years, but he didn´t know anything about them. He smiled and retired to the kitchen.  
“Can we talk?” asked Rowena “In private please” Dean looked at her and nodded in agreement.  
“Let´s go out back” Dean pointed Rowena the way out to the back porch and she followed closely. Once they were outside behind closed doors, the formality disappeared.  
“It has been a long time Dean” said Rowena trying to smile  
“Yeah, almost three years now since you left” Said Dean bitterly  
“You know why I needed to leave Dean” She got close and placed a hand over his shoulder “I could say it was nothing personal, but you know it was as personal as it could possibly be” Dean shook his head  
“You said nothing, you just left… you realized how it felt?” Dean accused with his tone while stepping even closer to her.  
“Dean, dean, dean … what could I have said… that after that night… after what happened in that hotel room… I couldn´t stay…”   
“Ro …. We could have talked it out… we could have fixed our relationship, you didn´t have to run” Dean stated very seriously  
“I am in love with you Dean, I have been for years, what did you want me to do … after that night I couldn´t look at myself in the mirror Dean… you are a married man and I … this is not the person I wanted to be… I am not the house breaker, I am not that kind of person that jumps into his colleague´s bed … I left for myself, to keep my own sanity” she explained.  
“No bad water under the bridge then?” asked Dean “ Ro, I am happy to see you commanding the team, it suits you”  
“Thanks, it means a lot coming from you” She hugged him and Dean hugged her back “I missed you Dean” she looked at him and asked “No weird feeling about me giving you orders now?”  
“Missed you to girl! And you should know I love you alright? So I would never do anything to undermine your work, you know me. Shall we go inside so I can update you? ” Dean suggested and entered the house though the livingroom again. All that conversation and Dean hadn´t notice that Sam and Gabriel were in the kitchen and they had heard it all. They remained silent and looked at each other in disbelief. Dean had a one night affair with that woman … how could he have done such thing to Cass?? Sam couldn´t believe it.  
“I thought Dean was gay, straightly into man” said Gabriel quite furious  
“Well I thought he was straighlty into Cass!” said Sam “Cass is my brother… how could he? This is not like Dean….” Argued Sam but Gabriel was not ready to give Dean the benefit of the doubt  
“He made Cass move back here and now his life is in danger … my brother loves him blindly and he used to spend his nights with that red head?” Gabriel´s tone was now deadly  
“Hey as far as we heard it was just one time, and we don´t really know how far that went… maybe we are taking this out of context…"  
“He said he loved her Sam!, that he loved her!” Gabe stated but they fell silent once John entered the kitchen  
“Is coffee ready? These guys are getting seriously into police talk and I need to lay down a little, but they need that coffee” Asked John sensing the tense atmosphere in the kitchen “I know we have been a little tense, but don´t let this get to you alright?”  
“Sure John, don´t worry” answered Gabriel.  
“Good night Dad” said Sam looking at Gabriel. He was hurt, the idea of his brother being betrayed hurt him deeply, Sam hugged him at despite being a little stiff at the beginning, then Gabe melt in the embrace “We need to talk to Dean…”  
“Make sure he doesn´t do anything stupid while the red head temptation is around here” Said Gabe.

 

They served the coffee and hear some of the police talk, they all took turns to check on Mary. In one of Castiel´s turns, Rowena was upstairs in the bathroom and when returning back she peeked into the slightly litted room where the baby noises where coming from. She saw Cass humming a song to a little baby in his arms. Cass saw her at the door and pointed her to come in.  
“So, it finally happened. You got the family you were always talking about” said Rowena on a whisper  
“Yeah, she is Mary Winchester” said Cass proudly  
“Future FBI agent” said Rowena with a smile  
“No if I had something to say about it…” said Cass immediately “But… it she takes up to her father… well she would be soon begging Dean to ride along him in the patrol car … like he used to do when he was a kid… so you are back in San Francisco” it was not a question just a way to lead the conversation back to the topic Cass wanted to discuss  
“Yes, they offered me Dean´s position, due to Benny´s decease Dean would have been promoted to chief, due to his choice of leaving the unit for the coordination office, there was an unexpected need for a senior officer to take the place, they called me”  
“And it wasn´t weird to be back? With the old team?” Cass asked  
“You know don’t you? Rowena looked at Cass´s eyes and knew for sure that Dean had told Castiel everything “Well, Dean was no longer working there, so I took the job, being back in the team was nice and Dean never said a thing about us… except to you. So I didn´t have to face rumors of being a home wrecker or trying to jump in bed with my superior...” Rowena looked back at Cass to see if he was angry. Cass laid the baby back in the crib carefully and covered her with the blanket. She had fallen asleep again.  
“That night, when Dean came back home unexpectedly, he told me everything that happened. He was sad and he blamed himself for letting that happen” said Cass  
“I am sorry Cass, we were friends… and I betrayed your trust” admitted Rowena  
“I have never had an ounce of doubt on my husband, not even once I doubted he loved me. I am sorry you fell in love with him, because you are a good woman and deserve to be loved back. Dean would never love you that way, he sees you as a sister or sorts but that´s it” Cass said trying not to be cruel.  
“Yeah, Dean made that clear” Said Rowena “I am not here to try anything” she added  
“I appreciate you saying that” answered Cass   
“I am glad he is happy, he had you and baby Mary, he seems happy being the town sheriff… I hope we are solving this soon so you can go back to your lives” said Rowena “I just wanted to tell you that I will keep this visit professional”  
“Thanks you Rowena” said Castiel pointing her to leave the room and the baby to rest and go downstairs to join the others. When they were going down the stairs, Sam and Gabriel shot concerned looks at each other when seeing Cass and Rowena together. 

It was pass midnight when Dean sent them to the hotel with the plan drafted to start working tomorrow early in the morning. He also instructed all of them to take extra precautions. Guns were place around the house in strategic points, loaded and ready. Nobody was to leave the house by themselves at any time and under no circumstances. Trips by car, from point A to point B and constant text contact to keep everyone informed of locations and plans. They all went to bed.

The whole week Dean had been working all day and late nights with his former team, they were making lots of progress but Dean didn´t want to discuss their leads until they had something definitive. During the whole week, Sam and Gabe have been weird with him and that had him feeling uneasy. On Friday morning they were having breakfast, Sam and Gabe, Cass and Dean. Both John and Mary were still asleep.  
“We are getting the phone records subpoena today, so we will have a long day, we may get to arrest some people!” said Dean happily  
“So analyzing those phone records we might get to know who is pulling the strings?” asked Cass caressing Dean´s arm while zipping his coffee  
“Yeah babe! This might be closed soon” said Dean “Don´t wait for me tonight, I will have a long one, we might even pull an all-niter, I will text you” Dean kissed Cass and Gabe scoffed   
“You haven´t barely been home since your FBI pals came to town…missing them much Dean?” asked Gabriel with a harsh tone. Dean frowned but Mary started crying and Cass went upstairs before he could think more about the tone.  
“Well I would lie if I say I didn´t missed the FBI” admitted Dean “But I don´t regret leaving it”  
“Really?... and what other things you do regret Dean?” Gabriel asked and turned around to leave the room but before exiting he said “Just try to remember where your loyalties stand this time”  
“What? What did he mean? Sam what is wrong with Gabe?” asked Dean “He has been weird around me all week ...” asked Dean but he deep down knew the answer “Fuck! He blames me for getting Cass into all this mess, isn´t it?”   
“No Dean, it is not that” Sam said and then he decided to be honest with his brother, he owed him that. Dean might have made a mistake getting involved with Rowena, but he chose to be here with Cass so he just wished he didn´t make the mistake again. “Dean, you and Cass are not alone anymore, you have Mary now you are a family now... You have to think less with your dick and more with your brain, you cannot risk everything you have here, and you have a family… a baby”  
“What are you talking about?” Dean was very confused “Thinking with my dick?”  
“Yeah, how many late nights did you have? Eh? How many all-niters this week?” and Sam had said all-niters with a weird tone and a suspicious look in his eyes.  
“What are you saying Sam?” asked Dean realizing his brother was being serious.  
“Rowena Dean, you know what I am talking about” Said Sam harshly and that made Dean step back in disbelief “I know about Rowena Dean, you should respect Cass more, he is also my brother and Mary is my niece… I just… I don´t want to see you make the biggest mistake of your life” Sam left the room and Dean sat there confused and out of place. Cass coming back to finish his coffee brought him back to reality but then Cass saw his look and knew immediately that something was wrong  
“What is wrong babe?” asked Cass  
“Hey Cass, you know I love you right?” asked Dean  
“Of course! Can you tell me what is going on? Something is bothering you… I can tell” Cass held Dean´s hand over the table  
“You could always read me like an open book… I know I have been out a lot this week, spending time with the team … I even spend some nights out… leaving you here with all my family mess and Mary all alone…” Dean just wanted to find the right words  
“Hey I understand, I am the first one interested in getting to the bottom of this, for our own security” said Cass “I am happy your friends are here to help”  
“Even Rowena …?” Asked Dean and that made Cass smile tenderly  
“Is that what has been bothering you?” Asked Cass with a frost look in his eyes and a little smile in his mouth. He moved forward and kissed him “Do you think I am jealous or worried?  
“Gabriel told me that I need to get my loyalties straight and Even Sam had suggested that … I am leaving you aside, that I am spending nights out, he suggested that there is something between Ro and me… you know that is not it right?” Dean feared to ask  
“I know that babe, you would never cheat on me not then, not now. You would never hurt our family. Don’t worry about Sam I will talk to him” Cass suggested  
“I love you Cass, I have never loved anybody else” Said Dean kissing him  
“I know and I trust you, you have my trust and my faith 100%, you always had. You should know that Rowena and I talked the day they came to our house, she met Mary…”  
“Oh!” Dean didn´t know Cass and Ro had a moment  
“Yeah, she apologized for what happened that night. She was not too surprised to know that you had told me all of it… She said she was happy for us but I can tell she still loves you.” That make Dean flinch a little “she loves you enough to want the best for you, she knows that us and Mary… that were a family and that was the best thing in your life. She is a good woman and she knows she has no chance” Cass said  
“Yeah she is a good person and she used to be a good friend, well she still is. She is good at her job too. She has been nothing but professional” said Dean  
“Go to work, keep me posted if anything happens, I will talk to Sam and Gabe” Said Cass comforting him. “I love you”  
“I love you too Cass” And Dean left heading to the station. Cass sat down at the kitchen table again and finished his coffee. He remembered clearly the night that Dean had arrived home unexpectedly and he saw his confusion. He was supposed to be in Baja, they had finished the case, they were wrapping up the last minute things ans flying back tomorrow morning and suddenly 3 am and Dean was home. Not that he didn´t like to have his husband back sooner by surprise but he felt something was wrong by the way Dean was holding himself. He spent a long time in the bathroom and finally got in bed with Cass and held him tight.  
“Something happened” he said  
“Tell me Dean, I know something is bothering you” Cass could feel how tense Dean was  
“You know I love you right?” Cass nodded in his arms “I have never felt attracted to anyone else and I have never felt any kind of desire towards women”  
“I know” said Cass trying not to discourage him from sharing  
“Ro and I have been growing close, I like to work with her… I somehow see her as a little sister… but I might have made a huge mistake” said Dean “Today when we finished the case we went out for a beer all together, when I went back to my room I called you and then Ro showed to my room, she wanted to talk…” Dean was shaking now and Cass turned around to face him and wrap him in his arms “She kissed me … she said she was in love with me, that she couldn´t hold on anymore, that she needed me to make love to her… Cass? Say something please?”  
“I am so sorry Dean … how did you manage it?” asked Cass moving his hand over Dean´s back soothing him  
“You are not going to ask me if I did?” asked Dean confused  
“Did what?” asked Cass back  
“Slept with her?” asked Dean  
“I know you didn´t sleep with her, I know you didn´t kiss her back… it might have been a very confusing situation and difficult to manage, I worry about you” Said Cass with a kiss on his lips  
“you trust me that much?” Dean was amazed  
“I do” stated Cass simply and honestly and Dean melted in his arms breathing his scent and feeling home again.  
“I told her that I didn´t see her like that, that she felt like family and that she should have known how much you meant to me. I would never jeopardized our relationship because I love you more that anything else. She was hurt, she tried to talk me out of it, she said she could …” Dean stopped himself because those words were going to hurt Cass too _  
“It is alright, you don´t have to tell me. I am sorry for her. How do you think this is going to affect your work together?” Cass wondered what she had possibly said that had made Dean so nervous  
“I had already my things packed, so I asked her to leave and got my stuff, called the office and told them to rush my flight back overnight. I wanted to be home, tell you all about it.” Said Dean “I don´t want to hide anything from you, never risk your love for me, It is all I have”  
“I would never stop loving you Dean. You could go on a murder spree and still I wouldn´t stop loving you… sometimes if freaks me out how unconditionally I trust you. But I think it is because you allow it to be like this. You come home and you bare your soul to me, you are yourself around me and I am around you too”  
“She asked me to leave you and start a family with her…” said Dean holding tight to his husband, he felt Cass flinch with his words “But I cannot even imagine having kids with anybody else. The whole idea, the need that I have to be a father is correlated with you being in my life. I want a family with you! If you are not there, there is no point”_

_When Sam and Gabe came downstairs, Cass was there sitting with the coffee still in his hands and a lost look.  
“Are you alright Cass?” asked Gabriel coming to his side  
“Sit down you both, We need to talk” Gabe and Sam looked at each other and sat down with him “I know you love us, and you have been behaving like two assholes all week because you care” Gabe and Sam were both going to argue but Cass shut them down “Whatever you think you know, you don´t! you should stop making assumptions about Dean, he has enough in his plate to worry about what you two think about him” said Cass  
“So you are not worried…” asked Gabe “Dean spending all that time with his friends… not sleeping at home…you don´t wonder what else might be going on? Asked Gabe to the point  
“I know you think Dean is cheating on me with Rowena” Cass looked the shock wash over their face   
“We overheard a conversation between them…” Started Gabe but Sam interrupted him. Was Gabe about to tell Cass about Dean´s past indiscretion? That could destroy their marriage. Gabe looked at him confused.  
“Cass we don´t want you guys to be in trouble, you are happy together right? You are a family now…”  
“Ok, I am just going to stop you right now. I don´t know what you overheard Ro and Dean talking about but I can imagine. You need to stop judging Dean, He would never cheat on me, he loves me.  
Rowena left the unit because she fell in love with Dean. One night after a case, she decided to come clean to Dean, she confessed her love for him and kissed him, she proposition him…well more than that she made Dean an offer… she offered Dean to start a family if he left me for her” Sam an Gabe were in shock looking at him “Dean refused her advances and flew home that night, when he got home he told me everything about it. Rowena was so ashamed by her behavior and hurt for Dean´s rejection that applied to another job and left without further notice. Dean took that hard, he felt like he had done something wrong by not realizing about her feelings before. He tried to talk to her a couple of times afterwards but she never picked up the phone”  
“We … well let´s be honest. Sam wanted to give Dean the benefit of the doubt but I was so angry that I immediately assumed the worst” Said Gabriel “I just… I don´t want you to be in pain”  
“I wanted to trust Dean and his love for you but I was also afraid … you know? About what could happen if…” Sam didn´t voice it but Cass knew. Once he had confessed to Sam that if Dean was gone he would have no reason to be alive anymore. Dark times after Dean got seriously injured on a FBI case before leaving the field office.  
“You don´t have to worry about that … I would never think that anymore… I have Mary to watch over now. Things will never be the same again, even if something happened and Dean and I …” Cass didn´t dare say it.  
“I understand… so you and Dean are good?” asked Sam  
“Yeah Sam, we are good. Rowena even apologized for trying to break us apart, I showed her Mary and she understood that Dean had everything he had ever wanted here with me. But even if she still wants something with Dean, he would never agree” explained Cass “Can you both please stop acting like assholes and let Dean do his thing, he is the best at his job, he will see this through but he needs our support” asked Cass and both guys nodded in agreement._


	16. The killer in the shadows

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beware, rape and non-con chapter content.

Dean was at the station working with Aaron on analyzing the phone records when the search warrant came. They had now green light to search the home of the two suspects.  
When they tracked the phone of the they interviewed the witness and he gave a pretty interesting description of the two man he saw at the bridge. It had been due to the very unique tattoos of the perpetrators that Dean could identify them from the database, they both had records, minor stuff mostly, they were the scum of the town. With the subpoena of the phone records, they crossed the phone calls and they both had some calls back and forth with a third unknown number. That might be the hand moving all these in the shadows. There was a frequent line of communication leading to the night Dean´s car was torched, then again before Cass was assaulted and the other man was killed.  
The team assembled the unit to register the house of both suspects but much for Dean´s annoyance, he had to stay behind and let them do their work. He was not FBI anymore. So he stayed at the station and kept digging with the phone company to get the identity of the unknown number. After a lot of stalling and faxing the subpoena to the company, he got the phone registry data. Dean blinked and read it again, the phone was registered to Luc Jean Novak. “Fuck” said Dean reaching for his phone and calling Cass but changing his mind in the last minute. He texted Rowena with his findings and then told her he was heading home. Then texted Cass “Heading home, I found something, need to talk”  
He walked out into the parking lot and got his police car keys from his pocket, suddenly he felt like someone was behind him, when he turned, nobody. The whole parking lot was empty and silent. He cursed himself for being afraid little a little boy and got in the car. He needed to tell Cass that he has proof now that the person managing all the incidents was his older brother but as he stopped into the first intersection, the car behind him crashed into him. Dean cursed and got out of the car in order to check on the driver, he seemed to be alright. He was helping him out of the car when another car pulled by their side and suddenly the injured man he was trying to help and that felt almost dizzy a second ago had a knife to his throat and was pushing him towards the third car. He felt something puncturing his neck and he felt woozy, suddenly a zip tie was wrapped around his hands and he was being pushed into the trunk. He tried to stay awake and remember when he was going, how long he was in the car or the turns but after a while all went black.  
When Dean came to, he realized he was tied to a chair and he was alone what it seemed the basement of an abandoned building but nothing he was familiar with … wasn´t he in town anymore? How long had he been unconscious? Where was his phone? He struggled to get free but he was thoroughly tied.  
“Looking for your phone Sheriff” asked a man´s voice from a dark corner and at that point Dean realized he hadn´t been alone at all, the man had been sitting there observing in the shadows “I got rid of it you know… don´t want your FBI colleagues to find you before I cannot have any fun with you right Dean? Your husband had been calling you like crazy…”   
“Who are you? Show yourself?” asked Dean angry and worried. Many thoughts passed thought his mind but two were stronger. One Cass was worried, he was missing and Cass was worried. The second one, there was a chance he wouldn´t make it out of this situation.  
“Ohh, You don´t remember my voice beautiful? I do remember yours Dean…” Said the man from his dark corner “I was always there Dean, always silently adoring you, looking for you … you didn´t even know I existed right?. You were always with all those girls, I loved you so much… but you were obviously not into men and I decided to leave because I knew I couldn´t have you and that was driving me crazy..”  
“What are you talking about? Who are you?” asked Dean again now more awake. He checked the zip-ties in hands and feet… he knew there was no way he would get out of those restrains. He needed to buy some time. Time for his team to realize he was missing.  
The man stood up and caught Dean´s attention, walked outside the darkness and Dean´s eyes opened widely in surprise Luc Novak was the kidnapper. “Hello darling”  
“Luc” Dean whispered in fear. The preacher has him kidnapped.  
“Aww you know my name… Should I feel flattered or … maybe you know who I am just because my little shitty brother Cassie told you. Do you even recollect seeing me in high school?? Eh! I am 4 years senior to you Dean… I tried so badly to make you notice me… but I had to leave because I couldn´t have you and I needed help. So I enrolled in the seminar and left town… imagine my surprise when I come back for some family days and I decide to pick up Cass from the field as a surprise… when I get there I see him sitting next to you!” Luc´s eyes were now darkened with anger but he kept going “You were holding his hand and gave him a hug”  
Dean could remember that day now… it was the first time he had talked to Cass and all because Sam had tricked him. He had asked Cass on a date and apparently Luc had been there… he was in town but he didn´t remember Cass telling him anything about it… then it all came to him “You were in town… you killed those kids didn´t you?” Dean was now freaking out.  
“Well, I had to… your fault Dean! You! I wanted you so dam much and you wanted Castiel? I hated you so much but I also loved you … I tried to connect with them, tried to make them understand that I mattered … I needed to know what I did wrong? Why my love for men was defective… why you didn´t love me back Dean?” there was accusation in his tone he gripped the chair violently “They didn´t help me understand why they were in love, how to make you fall in love with me! They were useless, afraid … they I killed them” He said on a whisper  
“Why the girls though?” asked Dean now wondering   
“Well I expected some female inside wisdom about it… but they were as useless as the boys…”  
“You killed three innocent kids Luc!” cried out Dean  
“I did it because of you Dean!” he screamed like possessed. His face was now red with anger.  
“Don´t blame that on me!” answered Dean “They had nothing to do with me!”   
“You are right… I should have killed Cass but somewhat I felt like I couldn´t kill me brother …” added Luc calm now with dead expression “How could I blame him for falling in love with you…”  
“But you tried to kill him last week” said Dean trying to achieve two things, getting him to talk about what he was into and make some time hoping for his team to figure it out where he was..  
“Well I realized that with some money… you don´t have to get your hands dirty. I paid those idiots to burn your car… and to kill Cass but they killed the wrong guy! Jajajaja Can you believe it? Castiel is one lucky SOB” said Luc laughing like a maniac. Dean pondered his chances and he realized there was almost no change he was making it out of that basement alive.  
“Why preaching against Gays when you like men yourself…” Asked Dean and he saw Luc´s expression change and Dean wished he hadn´t asked that. “I don´t like men Dean, I just want you. And although it is unfair that Castiel had you first… You are mine now!” the way he said that made Dean shiver.  
“Are you going to kill me? “ asked Dean  
“I am afraid I will have to, but not right away… I want you Dean…we are going to have fun Dean…” Luc sat on Dean lap and kissed him “I am going to undress you, touch your gorgeous body and take what has always been rightfully mine…” He whispered at Dean making him wince with fear. He kissed his neck and touched his shoulders “So strong… we are going to have so much fun my lovely Dean”   
“I am a married man Luc, you are a man of faith… you can´t do this!” tried Dean but Luc silenced him with duct take and then Luc unbuckled his uniform slacks Dean panicked feeling Luc´s hands on him was looping on his mind while he saw how Luc got his trousers and underwear down his legs. He opened his button up shirt and looked at him licking his lips. “You are gorgeous Dean” Luc before heading towards a little table next to the door and he was assembling something. Dean struggled trying to break free from the zips but it was useless. Luc then approached him and in his hand he was carrying a syringe. Dean panicked and struggled more “Don´t worry Dean, I just need you completely naked and this will help you relax”  
“ nummmmmm nnnnoooo noo” Dean was screaming behind the duct tape trying to make Luc stop. He injected him and Dean immediately felt dozing. He was almost completely naked, drugged and in the hand of a psychopath. He tried to stay awake but couldn’t.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beware, rape and non-con chapter content.


	17. The killer in the shadows II

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rape, non-con warming

When Cass heard the knock on the door, he opened it immediately hoping it was Dean and saw Rowena and Aaron “Dean is not with you?” Ro looked miserable “Please tell me that Dean is alright? Please please…”   
“He is missing. We need to talk” she said getting into the house. Sam and Gabe were there too. “Dean texted us some details and we arrested the two man responsible for killing the man they thought was you Castiel”  
“Dean was right …” whispered Cass “He texted me about two hours ago, saying he was coming back home that he needed to talk to me... I was getting worried… I even called him a couple of times first it was ringing now it goes straight to voicemail”  
“We found Dean´s patrol car by the road, not to far from here, he had a bump at the back, it seems someone run him over and then somehow overpowered him. That was two hours ago. He was coming here to let you know that we have solid evidence that your brother Luc is the one behind all this.” Said Ro looking at Cass “I am sorry I am being so blunt but we need your collaboration to find Dean” Cass nodded in understanding.  
“Oh god!” Said Gabe “Are you sure, he had always been a little shady and silent but he never felt like a threat”Gabe was exactly one year younger than Luc and they never had a close relation but Gabe always thought that it was because they had nothing in common.  
“Can´t believe it that my own brother tried to kill me… and now he has Dean?!!!” Cass panicked “He has Dean Oh god!” Ro tried to ground him “We are already trying to find Dean, we need to know if there was any favorite place, any Novak´s property he liked… anything to help us find him and figure it out where did he took Dean” Ro begged “Time is of the essence”  
“We already raided the church and his apartment in town but no traces of Dean or any struggle” Said Aaron “We know Dean didn´t suffer any injuries from the road accident, it was minor, therefore he was either tricked or drugged… it is not easy to surprise Dean and overpower him like that”  
Cass and Gabe called Anna, she also came over despite her advanced pregnancy. They told the FBI team everything about the family and the things Luc like to do as a kid … Cass tried to hold himself and be coherent but later in the afternoon he started spilling tears anytime anybody mentioned Dean being gone. Sam comforted him as best as he could and tried to have Cass focus on Mary but anytime Cass was in the room with her, he started to cry even more. Ro promised to call them as soon as they had a solid lead on Dean´s whereabouts. Finally Cass had fallen asleep in his and Dean´s bed holding a fussy and exhausted Mary in his arms.   
Not too far at all, in one of the old Novak´s warehouses that was now only used for after Christmas retail, Dean woke up from his haze … it all felt too weird, he was dizzy and cold. It was completely dark and he could hear the crickets on the background noise so he realized he had been out for hours, it was the middle of the night. He also realized he was in a different position, not tied to a chair anymore, his hands were chained to the floor also his feet. He was on his knees and when he tried to move he felt like something was holding him in place. Dean struggled but he couldn´t move an inch. He was tied with rope around his tights to a structure that was holding him in place, on his knees and ass on display. He panicked, he was tied and at Luc´s mercy now. Completely naked he shivered with cold but mostly with fear. Who knows how much later, he heard footsteps going downstairs and the light was turned on making Dean´s eyes water with the sudden change of light. He looked up and saw Luc walking towards him. He stopped a meter away and inspected Dean´s body.   
“You look so perfect on your knees for me Dean” Said Luc and Dean thought Luc approached him and started to undress. Dean´s mind was shutting on him, he could only think that he had never been with anyone other than Cass, he had told Cass a million times how glad he was he had never been touched by anyone like he liked to be touched by his husband, and now, that was about to change. What would Cass think of him if he knew?. Luc moved around Dean and he felt a hand on the low of his back, Dean panicked and struggled.  
“I will make it good for you my love” said Luc moving his hand around his ass cheeks and dropping little kissed in his skin “You look beautiful like this opening up for me…”  
“Luc, please, don´t do this, please. I don´t want this… please stop it!” asked Dean like a plead and then he felt some liquid over his hole, it was lube no doubt, suddenly Luc´s fingers were there and one breached Dean´s hole. He cried out in desperation “Stop stop, get out of me” But Luc in response got Dean´s soft dick in hand and started stimulating him.  
“Too noisy Dean… I am going to keep you quiet but if you struggle too much I will have to drug you…. Like I did with Gabe and that takes part of the fun…” Luc said and Dean went blanc trying to process what he had heard. Luc had been the one that dosed, raped and almost killed his own brother… what he had planned for Dean would be way worse.  
Luc taped Dean´s mouth and went back to finger him. One finger soon turned into two and then three. He was relentless and went for his prostate every time while pumping his dick. Dean was ashamed but as much as he wished it away and tried to think about other things, he was just erect in Luc´s hand. Luc had noticed too and he whispered in his ear “See I told you that you will love it Dean… now I am going to make love to you and I am going to cum deep in your ass Dean… you will love it and you will come with me pleasuring your perfect body” Dean was crying now, he could fell his tears rolling down his chest but as much as he tried he was completely immobilized. Maybe it would be better if he struggled like crazy and Luc dosed him. He would probably overdosed like he intended Gabriel and at least he wouldn´t have to live through this… he felt the blunt head of Luc´s cock on his hole. Thought Dean and before anything could happen there was a noise upstairs and a phone ringing furiously.  
“Fuck” said Luc “I will be back in a second beautiful” he said Kissing Dean´s temple and leaving the basement. Dean struggled until he felt like the last drop of his strength was gone. He cried in desperation and thought of Cass and Mary.  
He would never see Mary grow up, he would never see Gabe and Sam marry, he would never get to see his dad healthy again… he would never see his husband´s eyes again. Another noise upstairs called his attention and again Luc was coming back down. Dean held his breath but when the door opened, Ro was there, she was in shock at the sight of Dean but quickly moved forward and cut the ropes and zip ties, freed his hands and took carefully away the duct tape, helping Dean move from the weird torture holder Luc had him tied to. Dean´s voice was almost gone, he tried to ask “Luc?”  
“We got him, Aaron is upstairs” Ro got a blanket from a corner and covered Dean on it, she called Aaron that came downstairs to help her move Dean outside. Aaron had Luc handcuffed to a pipe while coming downstairs to help Ro and Dean, once the emerged from the basement, Luc was standing there, free, naked and holding a gun “You are not taking him away from me, it is our honeymoon!” he said “I love you Dean, you cannot run away from me darling, are you going back to him? Is that it? He has always been a problem…. I will get rid of him and then we will be happy”  
“You are delusional Luc” said Dean getting Ro´s gun from her leg holder and shooting Luc straight in the chest. He fell down dead on the spot. Dean collapsed to the floor and screamed in desperation.  
“It is going to be fine Dean, we will take you home” said Aaron  
“No!, I don´t want to go home, take me to the station. I don´t want anybody to see me like this, I don´t want Cass to see me like this...” said Dean.  
“Hey Dean… whatever he had done it is not your fault, you know that right?” asked Ro trying to manage the situation “If he forced himself on you, Cass will help you thought it…”  
“Just take me to the station!” Dean demanded. Ro complied but texted Cass that they had Dean, that he was alive and that they were heading to the station. “I need forensic officers to make a rape kit” said Ro trying to make Dean understand.  
“He didn´t… rape me” Dean has trouble saying it out loud “He was about to, but didn´t have the time, you stopped him” Dean was getting himself under control again “He admitted hiring two guys to torch my car and kill Cass, he also said he was the one that killed those teenagers twelve years ago… there is something else…” Dean hesitated. He didn´t know if he should tell Ro about something that was not his to tell but this was not just about Gabe, there were others matching the DNA profile “You will find that his DNA is a match for a series of unsolved rapings, Gabriel Milton is among them. He was drugged almost to the point of overdose and raped more than a decade ago. Luc said he did it”  
“Well it seems he had never been in Rome at all, he left the seminar after 6 months of enrolling and has been living on the east coast since then. His ordinance as preacher is a forgery. His record is clean, his DNA is not in the system”   
“He was completely delusional …” said Dean closing into himself again.  
Once they got to the station, all the proper paperwork and exams were done and finally they gave Dean the green light to have a shower and get into some clothes. He was already in the shower when Cass, Sam and Gabe arrived, Anna and Oscar were at Home keeping an eye at John and babysitting Mary.  
“Where is he Ro?” demanded Cass when crossing the door  
“In the shower” said Rowena trying to calm Cass down “I am going to check on him” Ro stopped him because she needed to explain when he will face in there.  
“Cass, can we the four of us talk privately for a minute?” The expression of her face made Cass agree, once they were behind closed Doors she explained “When we arrived to the warehouse, we tricked Luc with a phone call, he stepped from the basement naked. We arrested him and I went downstairs looking for Dean, what I found was… it was a shock, Dean was naked and tied in a structure that was made of several spreader bars, he was forced on his knees. He was restrained, completely immobile and defenseless. He was silenced with duct tape and he had been obviously crying. I thought Luc had raped him.”   
Cass closed his eyes and bit his lip trying to maintain control. Sam was shaken and Gabe was holding his hand. “Is he physically hurt, do we call an ambulance?” asked Cass when he managed the composure to talk.  
“Physically no, we did a tox screen tough, he was drugged multiple times, but it is the psychological abuse that worries me” Said Ro talking now to Cass “Dean told me that Luc was about to rape him but that we arrived on time. I don´t know how much of that is true. Dean seemed pretty terrified and he closed himself about the subject”  
“I need to go check on him” said Cass but Ro held him and added “One more thing, he was responsible for the murders in town twelve years ago and Dean told me he confessed to one thing more” Ro looked at Gabe now with a weird look “He was the one who raped you Gabriel, we still need to run his DNA but he told Dean that much” Cass looked at Gabe, he saw him collapse in Sam´s arms and he run towards the showers to check on Dean. When he entered the shower room there was one shower stall with running water, he saw Dean there, he was under the water spay sitting on the shower plate, head between his knees and curled in a corner.  
“Dean?” Cass closed the water and got Dean´s attention, he looked at Cass but then lowered his eyes to his own feet “Baby I got you now ok?” Cass got a towel and took Dean out of the cubicle and sat him over the bench, he was shaking now, in shock. “I am so relieved that you are alive” whispered Cass drying his husband´s body carefully and lovingly “You are going to be alright, I am here, not going anywhere”  
“Take me home please” is the only thing Dean managed to say. He was pretty broken but when they stepped out the shower room, Dean changed composure and exited the station holding as much pride as he could. Cass knew he needed to maintain that status, he was a strong man, he was the sheriff, he was their boss and now he felt vulnerable and afraid but he pretended not to for his own sake. Cass followed him and shortly told Sam he was going home, Sam and Gabe were staying longer and Cass thought that maybe they needed to hear Gabriel´s testimony about the assault again.  
His own brother…. He had done all this. Cass felt like this somehow was his fault, Luc was his own blood and he had damaged so many people he loved… he cared about. He felt rage towards his family for supporting him, for the first time ever Castiel felt like he hated them deeply, he hated them so fucking mush he wished they were gone! He reprimanded himself for that feeling but it was there nonetheless.  
Once they got home, they sent Oscar and Anna to rest. John hugged Dean tightly and Dean Façade flinched a little, but he did a good job keeping it together until he arrived to their bedroom. Cass checked on Mary, who was happily asleep in her crib and then entered the bedroom to find Dean sitting on his side of the bed holding his head on his hands.  
“Dean” said Cass sitting by his side, his eyes were afraid and Cass hated that on Dean. He was strong and seeing him like that was heartbreaking “You don´t have to tell me what happened exactly if you feel like you don´t want to, but I want to tell you something, can you look at me?” Dean lifted his eyes to find Castiel´s “I love you, I was so afraid that my brother was going to kill you… I am glad this is over. I don´t know what happened in that basement or what my brother had done or said…if you wish to talk to me, I am here to listed and help you thought whatever. If you don´t want to tell me I will accept that too but you need to know that no matter what happened I will never think less of you. Never. I love you Dean”  
“I love you too” Dean whispered “Can you lie here with me… hold me for a while?”  
“Of course Dean” Cass laid on the bed and held Dean spooning him. He dropped little reassuring kisses on his neck for a while they were silent.  
“He said he was in love with me” Cass flinched “Luc said he wanted me to notice him but I never did, he said he saw us Cass, they day we talked for the first time and that he was angry because I held your hand and hugged you … he killed those kids, he tortured them because of me…”  
“It is not your fault, you had no way to know any of this. My brother was a sick man Dean, he… was deeply troubled… more than I have ever suspected” said Cass brushing his lips into Dean skin “thanks god they got there on time to stop him”  
“You have no idea …” said Dean on a faint whisper “He … he …” Dean felt silent.  
“You can tell me anything Dean, you know me, all of me, and you know you can trust me with anything. This conversation will never leave this room” assured Cass  
“He said he was going to take his time with me and get what was rightfully his… he drugged me and when I woke up I was naked and on my knees, spread open and completely immobilized…” Dean paused and tried to control his breathing and Cass realized he needed to breathe too, because he was so afraid of what Dean was about to tell him that he had been holding his breath “I begged him not to… I didn´t want him to touch me … he said if I struggled too much he would have to drugged me first like he had done with Gabriel…” They both held their breath for a minute realizing how terrified they were at the moment and then proceeded to hug each other stronger in a struggle to comfort each other.  
“I don´t know how Gabriel is dealing with this now … Ro told him. Sam has been with him” said Cass “I can´t believe Luc… I can´t imagine how twisted you have to be…. Fuck” Cass said focussing back into Dean.  
“She should have waited … to tell him until DNA was a match… it is a lot to process” said Dean “I am glad is Sam is there for Gabe”  
“Yeah, me too” agreed Cass  
“He … touched me...” said Dean. Cass wanted to ask but he waited and let Dean resume his pace on telling the story “He fingered me open and masturbated me .. until I was… he was touching me and I tried not to…” Dean was now babbling and confused. Cass moved him to make Dean face him. He was crying silently.  
“Dean, tell me…” asked Cass kissing his teary face.  
“He fingered me relentlessly stimulating my prostate, he was also giving me a handjob and I tried to beg him to stop, not to do this… I tried to wish it away but I… I got.. I got hard and he took that as a sign that I wanted that… I felt him, his dick on me about to rape me… about to force himself on me. If he had just pushed a little… I felt him, he was about to… and he didn´t care I begged him not to … but then Ro and Aaron arrived and distracted him.”  
Castiel hugged Dean tightly now “Dean … what he did, restraining you and touching you in ways you didn´t want him to, that is already rape and getting hard is only a physiological reaction you cannot control those. It was your body trying to cope with what happening to you. You did nothing wrong!”  
“Why do I feel this tainted then?” asked Dean  
“Because he abused you, he crossed a line that nobody is supposed to cross” said Cass “But this is not on you!”  
“I used to be proud of you being the only one ever that had touched me like that… look at me now” said Dean hiding his face on Castiel´s neck  
“I still see the man I fell in love with, strong, loving, caring man that would do anything in the world to keep me and our family safe. I feel proud that I am the only one that has ever touched you in an intimate way with consent. Luc doesn´t get to take that away from us. He tried to force himself on you because he knew you would never give him that willingly, because you love me”  
“Yeah that is right I do love you Cass, please don´t leave me?” said Dean  
“Nothing has changed Dean, I am your husband, I am the only one that gets to touch you because you want me to, I am the one that gets to pleasure you, I am the one that gets to hold you at night or when you need me. That hasn´t changed. I am not leaving you … ever” explained Cass “You shouldn´t feel tainted, Luc was the tainted one. Rapist and murderer. A liar preaching in that church with hate and resentment”  
“I shot him” said Dean.  
“I am sorry. I know how much you hate to fire your weapon” said Cass while drying Dean´s tears from his face.   
“I could have shot him in the arm in order to stop him… but I wanted him dead. I couldn´t help it. I killed him” said Dean “I never thought I would cross that line”  
“I am sorry babe. I understand why you did it. I am sure your colleagues will back up your self defence argument”  
“Well it was self-defence but… if he was another person, if he hadn´t touched me that way I might had stopped him in another way, taking him into curt, make him face a judge… but instead I needed him to cease existing. I needed him gone. I don´t know If I can forgive myself for this…” said Dean “I don´t know if I could continue being a cop after crossing that line” he concluded  
“If you think you can´t, then you will find something else to do. You are a great cop Dean, you help people… are you sure you are not being too harsh on yourself. If this was Ro´s doing would you be advising her to leave?” Dean looked as Cass he had to admit that maybe he had a point. In that fraction of a second he revisited the incident and shook his head. “I need to get some sleep, please stay with me” begged Dean  
“Of course husband. I would do anything for you. I would have killed him myself to spare you from this” Cass held Dean and they both fell asleep. At some point in the morning Castiel woke up hearing Mary fuss in her room. He carefully moved from Dean´s embrace and held their baby close to his chest and headed downstairs.  
Sam was in the kitchen, sitting on the counter silently in front of a cup of coffee. When he felt Cass entering the room he looked up and offered to hold Mary while Cass prepared her bottle. Sam was looking tired when Cass sat down and started feeding Mary they both looked into each other. It was Sam who broke the ice.  
“How is Dean? I didn´t dare going in there…” Sam asked his brother in law   
“He has some things to deal with. I would advise you not to push Dean to tell you what happened during his captivity … he will tell you about it once he comes to terms with it, I am sure” Cass told him expecting more question  
“Oh god… did Luc raped him?” “How could he have done so much damage to all the people we love?”   
“It is not my place to tell you. This is something very private. I hope you can understand” said Cass wondering about Gabe “Luc was deeply disturbed and as far as Dean told me, it is not something new, he had been severely disturbed since we were kids. I have to come to terms with some of the things Dean told me too and I will have to pay a visit to my family as much as I despise it” that made Sam look back to him.  
“Are you going to see you parents?” asked Sam “maybe you should talk this through with Gabe...” Sam suggested with a frown “He might need to face some demons he had been pushing down for more than a decade”  
“You might be right” agreed Cass “Will you watch Mary? Dean is resting and he needs to rest. I will talk to Gabriel. How is he dealing with this?” asked Cass  
“Not good, this had triggered some memories or reactions … he flinches when I touch him and he cries all the time, the snaps at people … he is not alright right now” Sam explained trying to made Cass understand what is he going to find once he goes upstairs “Tread easy, he is very fragile” he advised  
“Thanks Sam, I don´t know what I would have done without you all this time” Cass transferred Mary to his arms and lovingly kissed Sam on his forehead along with a gentle caress on his shoulder “You kept me sane when Dean got shot and you took care of me and Mary when Luc took Dean. I owe you”  
“You are my brother, you owe me nothing. I love you that is why I do it!” Sam asserted  
“I love you too” Said Cass leaving the room and heading upstairs towards Gabriel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rape, non-con warming


	18. 2 broken can make it hole again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suicide references beware

Whatever the Novak family discussed in that house all Novaks were present, Gabriel and Michael, Castiel and Anna with their parents, they spent there several hours. The Novaks closed their business that same week, a moving truck was seen by their house the following week and soon after that their stores were being vacated by a company and a realtor placed a For sale sign on.  
The FBI closed their investigation pronouncing Luc Novak publicly as guilty of three charges of murder, one charge of assault, ten charges of rape across the country and kidnapping and assault of a police officer. For a while it was all the whole town was talking about. After a whole month of leave, Dean went back to work after completing the mandatory psychological evaluation and after promising Cass that he would continue seeing a therapist for a while. Gabriel went to the same therapist as well but he was struggling even more. Meanwhile all time, Charlie Bradbury, the renowned oncologist had come to town to visit John, she prescribed him a new drug more effective in his specific kind of Cancer and with less side effects on the long run, she had also advised him to smoke some pot to help with nausea related to the chemotherapy treatment and open his appetite because he needed to increase his body mass ASAP. Despite refusing profusely at first, after a couple of days with the new treatment he decided to give it a try. Cass had asked Dean Where to get pot in town and went to buy some for his father in law.   
“Well, here you have it” said Cass giving John the plastic bag filled with green stuff “I have to say that I never thought I would be buying pot…”  
“I never thought I would smoke pot and really? I thought you crazy artists were high during most of the creative process” said John making a weird face.  
“Myth John, I am afraid I am not half as high as I wish I could be right now …” said Cass sitting on the chair in the back patio and letting a loud sight.   
“Is everything good between you and Dean?” asked John cautiously and that made Cass flinch. Dean had been very adamant about keeping what had happened in that basement between them and in any case let John know. So of course things had been weird and tense, then better and finally last Monday night they had gotten really bad … but John didn´t know the reason why.  
“Sure John, don´t worry about it, smoke your pot and when you work an appetite I will make you an omelette with cheese, your favorite right?” said Cass ditching the topic.  
“Hey guys…” said Dean getting into the back yard “Wow dad… that a shitload of pot!” Dean looked at Cass and his husband avoided him.  
“Not funny officer…” said John. Mary cried inside and Cass used that as an excuse to get away from Dean as soon as possible, he made a sign that he would take care of the crying baby and leaving Dean and John alone. “I don´t even know how to roll one…” Said John who might have cancer but he was not blind and he has seen how his son and Cass interacted.  
“Let me” said Dean snatching the pot, paper and filters from John “Look and learn” Dean rolled one quite successfully and tended it to John, then rolled another one and placed it between his lips and using the lighter over the table offered it to his dad who leaned over to lit his joint  
“Do I want to know how the hell you know to roll a joint that well?” asked John with an amused look.  
“Probably not…?” said Dean lighting his own.  
“You are the law…” said John on a whisper.  
“Not in this house I am not, here I am your son, the one that went to university in California where pot is almost legal” said Dean tasting it “umm not bad…”  
“This is fucked up” added John “Smoking joints with my son in my own home…”  
“Hu hu” agreed Dean smiling and relaxing in the chair.  
“Can I ask you one thing?” wanted John to know. Dean looked at him and nodded “Are you going to leave Cass? The question made Dean loose his cool and looked at John with a frown “It is just that I know you are not alright together … Cass is sad, you are not yourself… since that loon kidnapped you…”  
“Cass is sad?” asked Dean concerned  
“Yeah, I found him crying in the nursery two days ago” revealed John  
“I.. I didn´t know…” said Dean looking troubled “I know I have been acting different. Something happened when that guy kidnapped me…I didn´t think I was strong enough to discuss it with you or anybody else for the matter… so I kept it inside. I only talk about it in therapy because … well it is what I go there for”  
“You don´t have to… but I am here for you son” said John looking carefully at Dean  
“He drugged me … and he planned to rape me… he kind of did” said Dean avoiding John´s eyes. There was a long silence and then John reached for Dean.  
“I understand that being forced like that is something difficult to deal with … feeling weak and at the mercy of somebody else that is there to hurt you… but you are strong Dean. You can overcome this” said John without hesitation “ and you should let Cass help you, he really loves you”  
“I feel like everyone who looks at me knows… how vulnerable I was… that he had me at his mercy… I feel like every time somebody looks at me… they heard me beg Luc not to fuck me…” That made John flinch a little “I hate the feeling”  
“Did something happened between you and Cass?” asked John  
“I… on Monday night I might have tried to probe a point, I told Cass that I was alright and I initiated something… you know sexual. At some point I started to feel tense and uncomfortable and I tried to hold on but it burst and I panicked and I begged Cass not to touch me anymore.” Dean felt ashamed but John put his hand over his shoulder and nodded in agreement like he understood something key.  
“Castiel loves you, he is in pain because he sees you suffer and doesn´t know how to comfort you. You started something and probably it felt great for Cass who hasn´t laid a hand on you otherwise… am I wrong?” Dean negated with his head “Then you behaved like he was Luc… the situation triggered the memory and feelings of what happened in that house and you made Cass feel like he was raping you all over again” Dean opened his eyes in shock. Did he do such thing? OMG He remembered Cass telling him that he was sorry a million times and of course never touched him again. He had been tense and distant since.  
“I didn´t realize…” John told him to stop raising his hand.  
“Luc was his brother, he probably already feels somewhat guilty that his own brother had made you and Gabriel suffer. Probably what happened only made it more intense. You might need to talk to him” advised John “There is something else I need to tell you. When I came back from the war I had flashbacks, episodes, nightmares… Your mom didn´t know how to help me, she suffered them alongside me. I soon realized that her touch grounded me, I used to focus on his voice, her smell so I broke the dream or panic attract and realized that I was not there anymore, I was home with her. She used to feel bad about me and instead I turned her into the solution, she was the cure. Eventually things get better, you get the grip of it and you see the panic coming and you manage it as best as you can. There were no therapist for common guys like me coming back from nam.”   
“I never knew…” said Dean  
“It was between your mom and me. I love her so much … still miss her…” trailed his dad sitting back and finishing the joint. Dean left his on the tray and got inside.  
“Cass can we talk for a minute?” asked Dean and Cass nodded placing Mary on Gabriel´s lap  
“Tell me, is your dad alright?” said Cass and Dean kissed him. His husband froze in place. He kissed him back slightly but didn´t move at all. Dean broke the kiss and hugged him. “Is everything alright Dean?” he asked worried.  
“It will be” said Dean and took Cass´s hand and dragged him towards their bedroom. He closed and locked the door behind him, Cass looked around like he was the one about to have a panic attack. Dean kissed him slowly and Cass kissed him back, still his hands were hanging at the sides of his body. Dean´s hands were underneath his t-shirt, caressing his lower back lovingly.  
“Dean…?” asked Cass “Are you sure about this? There was fear in his eyes  
“I love you Cass” said Dean   
“I know you do, that was not my question…” answered Castiel  
“I am sure I want to try. Maybe we can move slowly” said Dean “I am sorry for what happened the other day. I need to stay present here, as long as I am with you I will be good. I love it when you touch me, I love to feel you I love to belong to you… I love you Cass”  
“I love you too Dean, we can try slow” said Cass walking towards the bed and lying down. Dean moved upon him and laid his body over his husband´s and kissed him lazily. The made out for a while until clothes started to disappear. Dean kissed Cass and worshiped his husband´s body, Castiel was still very tense and letting Dean take the rains, his hands were placed on the bedspread like he was afraid of touching Dean.  
Dean leaned and opened the nightstand drawer to get the lube. He coated his fingers and let them slip between Cass´s tights “Talk to me babe” begged Dean.  
“I love it when you touch me like this Dean” Cass let a moan when Dean´s fingers brushed his hole “Oh god please, please make love to me” He felt one finger breach him slowly.  
“Ummm Cass you are always so hot and tight… I missed you so much. I am sorry I have been so distant, I was trying to deal with things on my own without realizing that is you what I need… oh babe!” Dean had now two fingers deep in Cass´s ass and found his prostate making Cass ark his back from the bed and hold on to Dean. He smiled because he was finally making Cass react and get into it, he was no longer tense.  
“Oh god Dean!” Cass moaned when he felt Dean add another finger and took his cock in his mouth “You are going to make me come like this Dean”  
“I am so close myself Cass” said Dean moving his fingers out of Cass and going back to kiss him lovingly, Dean´s hand was lubbed and took both cocks in his hand, he laid over Cass and both pumped lazily into his fist until they were covered in slippery lube and come. Dean collapsed onto Cass and kissed his neck and ear lobe. “I love you husband”  
“I love you too Dean, are you alright?” asked Cass slowly caressing his husband´s body.  
“Yeah Cass I think I am getting there. I wanted to apologize for what happened the other day, I…”  
“There is no need” said Cass kissing him   
“No, listen. I need you to understand that whatever happens, if I get anxious or panic a little … or a lot like the other day, the only thing I need is to be reminded where I am, that I am not there with him anymore… I am so sorry for the reaction I had, I obviously couldn´t help it at the time but I realized that I might have hurt you a lot and for that I am very sorry”  
“Dean, seeing you hurting is what hurts me. Luc and what he did to Gabe and yourself hurts me… hunts me…” Dean realized Cass felt responsible for his brother´s actions.  
“Luc was an adult, sick perverse adult, but way older than you, you two have barely lived under the same roof, you didn´t know each other, you are responsible for nothing. I know your family has hurt you in ways that it is beyond belief. Your parent’s behavior, Luc´s … their silent treatment… but you have won some of them back, there is Gabriel who is here to stay, there is Anna who loves you very much and even Michael proved that he cared,he stood by your side when it mattered the most”  
“Yeah, you are right … and I got you and Sam … and John” said Cass “But most of all we got Mary now”  
“See? You have good things in your life, and Luc .. well even if he is somewhat present in this bedroom and it might be for a while … with some time it will fade into an old nightmare, he is not here anymore and we are together… which is what matters” said Dean getting a little emotional  
“Sappy old sexy sheriff” whispered Cass kissing him “I love you very much!, I missed this Dean”   
“I missed you too babe” Dean holed himself into Cass´s arms and rested there for a while.  
Downstairs John wanted Castiel´s omelette with cheese but when Sam had gotten upstairs to call Cass he heard them in their bedroom and went back downstairs with a silly face.  
“Is Cass coming?” asked John  
“Oh… well he is coming alright… but you are not getting an omelette any time soon” Sam implied and Gabe crocked an eyebrow worried while John smiled happily and asked for a sandwich instead. Once John left with his sandwich towards his room, Gabe asked Sam about what was going on upstairs “So… are they having sex?”  
“Yeah… definitely” said Sam  
“Do you think Dean is ready for that? I mean it has been a short while since Luc and …” Sam raised a hand to stop him “He is with Cass, they love each other, they take care of each other… they are figuring it out” Said Sam   
“But … I am worried for Dean, it is too soon, he is not ready!” argued Gabe getting angry  
“Are we still talking about Dean?” asked Sam regretting it immediately. Gabe stood up suddenly and put Mary on Sam´s arms leaving the room.  
“I am sorry Gabe… I didn´t mean… oh fuck…” said Sam watching Gabe go upstairs. Ten minutes later, Gabe came downstairs with a handbag packed and his laptop. Sam begged him to listen, to wait… that they could talk about it, but Gabe was adamant he didn´t want to stay in the house anymore, Sam tried to hold his hand but Gabe jerked off and violently pushed Sam away. He suddenly realized what he had done, he felt terrible but it was too late, he could see it on Sam´s face, he was afraid of him. “I will come back another time to pick up the rest of my stuff” he said while leaving the house.  
“I might be and idiot, but I really didn´t mean it like that Gabe, I love you” Said Sam getting up from the floor. Gabe flinched when he saw Sam crunch at his ribs, he had hurt the man he loved and that was not the first time in the last month… he was becoming an abuser. He realized that leaving now was the best for Sam even if he would never get over the loss. He got into the rental car and drove away. Sam´s eyes filled with tears. He sat down in the couch quite numb with Mary in his lap until Dean and Cass came downstairs. Cass went to get Mary and when he saw Sam´s face he asked him what happened “Gabriel left, he packed some of his things and left… he said he would come tomorrow to take the rest”  
“Did you guys had an argument?” asked Dean  
“He left me, I know I deserve it” said Sam and he put Mary on Cass´s arms and left too “Too good to be true” said before stepping out the door.  
“I haven´t seen my brother like that… ever…” commented Dean quite worried.  
“It is so not like Gabe to just pack and leave without talking to me…” said Cass  
“We are not the only ones that have been going through a lot after … you know” Said Dean  
“Yeah, I know” Cass picked the phone and Called Gabriel. Left a voice mail for him.  
Dean and Cass worried when Sam did not return that night. Dean had called to the station and hospitals around the area to gather information. No news was good news on that front. In the morning, nobody had any sleep in the house and Dean was getting incredibly stressed, after 9 there was a phone call, from the school wondering if Sam was sick because he had not shown at work. That is when Dean and Cass panicked. They called Gabriel, his phone was disconnected.  
A little after 10 Gabriel got to the house and let himself in with his own key, he wanted to pack and leave avoiding Sam who surely was at work right now. He found both Dean and Cass with terrified looks in the Livingroom.  
“Have you seen Sam?” Asked Dean getting up “What the fuck happened Gabriel! Where is my brother?” asked Dean, Cass tried to call him down.  
“What do you mean? Where is Sam? Isn´t he at work?” asked Gabe  
“No, he left soon after you yesterday, he is not picking his phone, nobody knows where he is and he hadn´t shown at class this morning. This is not like Sam!” said Cass “What happened yesterday Gabe? I wouldn´t ever try to interfere in your couple situation but Sam is missing… we are worried!” demanded Cass.  
“He went upstairs and heard you two have sex yesterday” said Gabe, his tone was accusatory somewhat “He said something and I flipped… I knew I had to leave, stay away. When I get this triggering feelings I get violent sometimes… I din´t want to hurt Sam I swear but yesterday it was not the first time … but it was the moment I saw what I am becoming … , I just needed him to be ok, he will be alright away from me. I couldn´t bear the thinking of hurting him… I went downtown to the hotel, disconnected my phone… shit! It is still off” said Gabriel turning it on. He got 20 missed calls from Sam´s cell phone all over the nigh, the last one a while ago this morning, he had several missed calls from Cass and two voice mails from him. And a text, from Sam, he opened it and his blood froze “I have never been really in love before. I am sorry I am not good enough, I wish I was. I am sorry, goodbye”  
“The text is from ten minutes ago, his phone must be on” said Gabe. Cass tried to call him, he heard the tone but nobody answered. Dean was on his phone too, he was talking to Jody at the station, they were trying to turn on the GPS on Sam´s phone to know his location… “Alright, he is on a motel by the airport in the city outskirts. I am on my way there”  
“Go, I will stay and watch Mary please call me to let me know he is alright!” said Cass kissing Dean  
“I am going with you!” said Gabriel. Dean gave him a hard look but Cass soften him with a pleading look.  
“Alright” agreed Dean running towards the police car. The drive took less than 10 minutes. When they arrived to the motel they asked the manager and he got an extra key for them. He opened the bedroom´s door for them and Dean and Gabe rushed inside to find nothing. The room was empty, over the table there was a piece of paper, his phone and a box.  
“Dear Dean, 

I am guessing it will be you who would find me. I am so sorry, I wanted to be who you all expected me to be, a good son, a good brother and a good boyfriend. Maybe even a good husband but I have been feeling a failure for a long time. I hadn´t even allowed myself happiness because despite being more than alright with you being gay I struggled to understand my attraction to man. And then I met Gabriel and felt was love really was like. Please tell him how sorry I am. Without him my life has no meaning anymore. I wanted to propose but instead I destroyed our relationship, I couldn´t help him, I only made it worse... But it will be fine from now on. Take care of yourselves. I love you very much.  
Please Dean, don´t blame yourself for this.  
Sam.”

“No no no… this… this is a …” suicide note? Dead couldn´t even say it out loud. Gabe had the paper on his hands and was shaking now. He opened the little box over the table, there was a beautiful gold band inside.   
“Where would he go…think Gabriel…”he whispered to himself now “C´mon Dean we might be still have time to stop him, where did he go? Why did he came all the way here to commit suicide? His car is in the parking lot” Dean considered it but ... he had no clue.  
“There is jumper´s point” said the manager whom both had forgotten that was still there. Dean and Gabe turned around and asked at unison “Jumper´s point?”  
“The bridge by the river junction, there is a path out back that leads there, takes 5 minutes or so” he said “I can show you”  
“Let´s go, there is no time to loose” Gabriel said and the three of them run out back and along a narrow path alongside the river, they saw the bridge ahead of them and there he was, sitting on a rock but he was not alone. There was a man with him.  
“Sam!!!” screamed Dean running towards him desperate.  
“Dean?” said Sam quite shocked.  
“Sam you son of a bitch!” said Dean while rushing Sam into his arms “Oh thanks god you are alright!”  
“I am sorry Dean, I am sorry” said Sam crying now.  
“He was coming back” said the other man “You must be the brother” he said. Dean stood up and properly shook the mysterious man´s hand. He was dressed casually but had a clergy collar. “My name is Adam Harvelle, I hike here every day in order to help people, maybe change their minds. I saw Sam sitting here and we had been talking” The priest gave Dean a little smile “He had decided to go back and return home when I arrived. He needs help”   
“Thanks father, our family is in debt with you” Dean said.  
“Sam?” asked Gabriel hesitant.  
“Gabriel? What are you doing here? I thought you would be gone by now, back to California” said Sam, he looked in pain.   
“Oh Sam…. I am so sorry” Gabriel fell on his knees and hugged Sam. “I am so sorry, sorry sorry” He was crying now and holding Sam like a life line. “I love you so much babe” That made Sam move back “Do you still love me? Are you serious?... after everything?”  
“Listen to me, you did nothing wrong. I should have been more open with you. I was afraid I would hurt you… when I am triggered I turn violent, I have panic attacks… then it happened and I realized it had happened more than one … I needed to get away from you for your own protection…you didn´t deserve someone like me around you… that is why I left”  
“You left to protect me?” asked Sam in awe “I thought you were so disgusted with me that…” Gabriel stopped him with a kiss “I love you Sam, I might not be used to be in a relationship and I obviously have some serious trust issues but … I … you are the best thing that has ever happened to me Sam. I don´t deserve you” Gabriel stated and then got the box out from his jacket pocket “Did you really meant it?”  
“Yeah” said Sam  
“If you still want me and you decide that I am worth it, I would say yes when the time comes. But not now, we need to take you home alright? Cass might be going up the ceiling right now!” said Gabriel  
“I will call him” said Dean  
“Take care Sam, it look like you have a good family here. It is normal to feel like you are not good enough sometimes, you just have to rely on those who love you to help you muddle thought those feelings and endure” said Adam “Here is my phone if you ever need to talk” said the man giving him a card.  
“Thank you father” said Sam while watching Gabe stand up and offer him a hand. He took Gabe´s hand onto him and stood up. “I am sorry I worried you like this. If it´s worth something, the moment I came up here I realized that this was not what I wanted. I wanted to see you again Gabe, I wanted to go home to Dean and Cass, I wanted to see Mary grow up and dad get better… I am sorry I worried you”  
“Don´t you ever think I will be alright on a world where you don´t exist!” said Dean “You are my little brother, there is nothing I wouldn’t do for you” Dean hugged him and the four of them went back to the motel parking. Sam got his things and he and Gabriel drove back home. Dean followed them in the patrol car. He called Cass as soon as he stepped into the car to let him know they had found Sam and that he was alive.  
Once at home after a strong hug from Cass, Gabriel took Sam upstairs, he made Sam change clothes and get under the covers and then sweetly spooned him lying over the bed sheets and talked to him until he felt asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> suicide references beware.


	19. REBORN

Seven months later.

 

“Big day today” said Cass kissing Dean´s shoulder while pouring coffee on his mug “Will you take care of picking up the cake?” asked Cass nervous  
“Hey babe, easy there” Dean grabbed Cass and grounded him by placing his arms around his waist “I know it is a big day, we have everything under control. I will pick up the cake, Sam and Gabe will put up the decorations and you can forget about this during the morning, you go take dad to his appointment and we will be ready for you when you are back” Dean kissed his husband  
“I love you” said Cass kissing him softly and melting in his embrace.  
“Gezz no smooching in the kitchen for god sake” said grumpily John entering the area “Are we ready to go?” he was obviously nervous and he eyed Cass looking for measurement.  
“Of course” said Cass getting towards the door and grabbing the keys “We will see you guys in the afternoon” John and Cass left the house and Dean sighted in worry and relief.  
“Are they gone?” asked Sam peeking from the top of the stairs  
“Yes, you coward. Grumpy and Angsty are gone now” said Dean mocking his brother. Sam came downstairs still in his pajamas. “You are not going to work today?”  
“Nope. Got myself a free day, Gabe too, we have plans for an empty house all day… please tell me you have plans to go?” begged Sam  
“Yeah, yeah, I am taking Mary to day-care and then I will work until 2, I will pick up the cake and head home” Dean stopped by the door with his coffee mug filled and turned around “By then I expect you and Gabe to be wearing pants and getting up the decorations for Mary´s birthday, you promised, otherwise Cass would flip on you both…” reminded Dean and Sam blushed and laughed.  
So yes, Sam had interesting plans with Gabe. It was the day, he was preparing him a nice breakfast in bed and then he will take him to his favorite candy shop in the city, to Copton High park with is the place they had gone in their first official date and back home. He wanted to propose naked in bed. Sam had anxiety and depression, he had his low back 8 months ago when he even considered killing himself but with the right help and some meds, lots of love and trust from the people who loved him, he was moving on. There were good days, even awesome days, sometimes there was meh days and less frequently there were bad days when he seemed to lose control of his life, when he wanted to lie in bed all day and that was when Gabe comforted him the most. He somehow understood how vulnerable he was and he took such good care of him. Sam loved him madly. And Gabe loved him back. Gabriel had been going to therapy in order to deal with his trauma, he was managing his violent outbursts successfully because he was not afraid anymore, somehow Luc being gone for good helped him and he felt like he could trust Sam completely. Two months ago they had sex for the first time. Gabe topped because he still felt quite insecure about letting anybody own his body after all that happened. For Sam his first time with a man was a mind opener, he already knew he desired Gabe, they had been fooling around for long, making out, exchanging handjobs and blowjobs but this was a big deal and it required a lot of trust. Sam had bared himself for Gabe and had enjoyed it despite being the first time ever. And it was all because it was with Gabe.   
Sam recalled a conversation with Dean many years ago, the night Dean and Cass had lost their virginity together, Dean had told him that he had waited and being with Cass felt right, felt perfect, because he was the right person. Now Sam understood it completely. He was glad that Dean had always been there for him. Sam smiled and went upstairs with the breakfast tray containing fresh brewed coffee, fluffy eggs and bacon, sausages, orange juice and a red rose.  
“Good morning sleeping beauty…” said Sam kissing Gabe awake.  
“Umm do I smell bacon?” asked Gabe making Sam smile “I love you!” he said kissing his freakishly tall and handsome boyfriend.  
The morning went perfect, Gabe was happy, glowing actually and enjoying his boyfriend´s company like a kid on a toy store. Reminiscing their first date was perfect. Sam took Gabe back home with the excuse of the decorations but the minute they crossed the threshold of their home he kissed him passionately and they ended up naked in bed. Sam loved this level of intimacy, which was when he took the little box he had hidden under the pillow and gathered his courage.  
“Gabe, I love you, I had such a wonderful day today, I wanted to do something special for you” said Sam, Gabe kissed him  
“I had a wonderful day too” agreed Gabe “Wish we could stay like this, naked here together forever… please?” he asked jokingly  
“Well I cannot make that happen no matter how much I wish I could babe, but what if I could promise you the part of being together forever?” Said Sam opening the little box and letting Gabe see the ring. Gabriel gaped. “I love you Gabriel Milton, Marry me?” said Sam with the widest smile ever.  
“Yes!” said Gabriel jumping into Sam´s arms and hugging him tightly “yes yes yes!!!! Million times yes” he kissed his fiancé and Sam put the ring on his finger “I can´t believe you did it!”  
“I never had a fraction of a doubt that we will end like this… I just needed to get better before giving the next step” said Sam honestly “I love you forever Gabe”  
“I love you forever Sam” Gabriel kissed him again and their naked bodies intertwined beautifully, Sam´s eyes opened wide in surprise when he heard his fiancé whisper in his ear “Please babe make love to me”  
“What are you… are you sure?” asked Sam raggedly with anticipation, Gabe´s eyes sparkled with desire and he nodded melting his body into Sam. Sam kissed him possessively “How do you want this…you should run this show” said Sam because independently of how much he wanted to ravage his fiance´s body he wanted Gabriel to enjoy this so maybe he should control how and when he was being touched.  
“Ummm you are letting me take over? Ummm how about if I ride you… but first you will need to prep me very thoroughly … face to face please?” Sam agreed to Gabriel´s demands smiling. He kissed him and slowly kissed his neck and jaw, he played with nipples making Gabe moan and continued trailing south until he was mouthing as his hipbones. Glorious hipbones he loved so much, Gabriel gasped in anticipation but Sam played around his cock without paying direct attention to it. He bit his tights and suck marks in his skin, he liked and sucked his balls until finally he took him in his mouth. Gabriel cried out, he loved Sam´s blowjobs he was so focused on giving him pleasure and looking his pretty mouth around his cock always made him shiver. Suddenly Sam pulled out and Gabriel was about to let a loud protest sound but the words stumbled in his throat in a cry of pleasure when Sam bent his legs upwards and licked his hole. Gabriel helped him maintain his position and holding his legs behind the knees letting Sam´s hands free for other pleasurable activities. Sam slicked a finger with lube and breached Gabriel, he closed his eyes and tensed suddenly.  
“I love you Gabe, we don´t have to do this, you can stop it anytime” said Sam  
“Sam… keep doing that but please talk to me?” so Sam did, he opened Gabriel good and slow, brushing his prostate now and them to increase his pleasure meanwhile he whispered how much he loved him, how beautiful he was for him, how much he adored his body, how beautiful were his eyes, how he loved when he fucked him, how deep he like to take him …how he loved to belong to him. When Gabe was ready, Sam asked for a final consent and Gabriel nodded, Sam lubbed himself and laid on the bed, immediately Gabe was over him and crawling to position, holding his cock in hand he sat on him all the way. They made love, Sam reminded Gabe that he could enjoy being penetrated, that when it came to his Sam, he was never going to be forced to do anything. Gabriel came loudly and his tears just spilled down his face. Sam came too, eyes closed and unleashed pleasure but when he opened his eyes and saw Gabe cry he worried. Gabriel told him not to, those were not tears of fear or sadness, they were tears of relief, love and freedom.  
Sam cleaned themselves and held Gabe on his arms for a long while and they both dozed off naked over the bed. A noise woke them up, they turned towards the bedroom door and a very angry Dean was there quite red.  
“Oh fuck… at least you could have answered when I knocked and avoid me from seeing all of my brother…” Said Dean  
“You knocked… sorry we didn´t hear you” said Gabe covering himself but Dean was now facing outside avoiding the naked couple.  
“Well you promised to decorate but Cass is almost back and guess what? No decorations are in place!” said Dean  
“Oh fuck what time is it?” Sam freaked when he saw the time “Ohhhh fuck we are so sorry, we will be downstairs in a second and we will work like crazy” said Sam apologizing  
In 30 minutes and with Dean´s help thanks to a easy going and quiet Mary they decorated the livingroom for her birthday before Cass and John made it home or any of the guests. An hour later the first guests arrived: Oscar and Annael with a very cranky Louise in their arms. Michael and his Wife Hanna and his three kids, Jody and the closer friends from the station. Only Cass and John were still missing. Dean started to wonder if the news were bad and maybe they needed more time, He checked his phone, there was a text a couple of minutes old “Don´t worry we will be home soon”  
“Happy birthday Mary!!” was Michael Saying while making her smile with a stuffed animal and looked at Dean “I can´t believe that you have invited us, thank you”  
“Cass deserves to have his family with him, he missed this for a long time… he hide it quite well but I have always known… how hurt he was when he sent the Christmas cards and there was no answer, when his birthdays passed and the phone never rang, the day he graduated .. I sent your mom the invitation and even me somewhat expected your parents to show up, I never said anything to Cass because I din´t want him to be let down again. They never showed. Everyone had their families over there… and Cass…” was Dean saying when Michael looked behind him and smiled pitifully. Dean turned around and saw Cass teary looking at him.  
“I never knew you did all that for me … that day was important and I had important people with me, you and Sam were there to support me, it helped” Said Cass kissing Dean  
“I love you, I just want you to be happy, that is what I have always wanted” Dean draped his arms around his husband and kissed his temple. “So … tell me the news…” Dean feared the answer  
“Your dad would do that, go talk to him. I need to hug my little munchkin” said Cass turning to Mary who was spreading her arms towards him in a gesture demanding to be picked up. Dean went to look for John. “Thanks for coming Michael and bringing the whole family”  
“I am happy to be part of your family Cass, I appreciate the second chance, I do” said his brother smiling honestly and hesitate pulled Cass into his arms for a hug. Cass smiled and hugged his long lost brother back. Then he focused his attention on his very happy 1 year old daughter. “I am going to change her and I will be downstairs in a minute” said Cass disappearing with her up the stairs.  
When Dean entered the kitchen, John was there alone. Sam entered the kitchen a second later “Dad?” asked Sam expecting the bad news. John turned to see them face to face and he had been crying. Dean´s heart felt like he was going to sink with fear.  
“The cancer has stopped growing” said John and both Dean and Sam looked at him in awe “Dr. Bradbury said that we have definitely stopped it from continuing to spread, she is quite enthusiastic that in the next session we will be seeing some regression”  
Dean launched at his dad who received him in open arms “I am so glad dad!!! I am so glad. I need you here” said Dean emotional.  
“I am here to stay” said John signalling Sam to join the hug. He did and they stayed there for a while. “What is going on here?” asked Gabriel “Is a happy or a sad group hug?” asked  
“A happy one” said John. Gabriel smiled realizing that the scan results had been positive and then joined the hug. Progress was slow but after so many months they were making progress finally.  
“I proposed to Gabriel this morning” said Sam   
“I said Yes!” finished Gabriel excited. The group hug dissolved and John hugged Sam “Congratulation son!” Old John was a little teary because it had been a long emotional day for him.  
“I am so happy for you guys!” said Dean “I hope to be the best man!”  
“Oh god are you getting married?” asked Cass from the kitchen door threshold quite in shock. Gabriel nodded “Oh my god! This is so great! Congratulations brother!”  
“Thanks babbyBro” said Gabriel joining hands with Sam and smiling beautifully while showing the ring on his finger. “Be my bestman?”  
“You bet on that!” Cass run towards Gabe and crushed him on a bear hug. Gabe returned the hug warmly and got a little emotional seeing Cass so happy for him.

And like that surrounded by her loving parents, uncles, cousins and granpa John, Mary blew her one year candle although she needed a little help from Cass. She was a happy baby in a loving family and she reflected how good future ahead they all had. Finally the sun was shinning for them.  
That night, when all the others had gone to sleep and they finished cleaning up the mess from the party, Dean and Cass sat together and shared a beer. Cass let his head rest on Dean´s shoulder while caressing his hair slowly. He was in love, he was so happy that he felt like his heart was about to explode. He turned to Dean only to see him staring.  
“What?” Cass asked intrigued by Dean´s expression  
“Marry me again” said Dean, it was not even a question it was a desire expressed out loud.  
“Dean? Where is this coming from?” asked Cass hoping into Dean´s lap and straddling him. His husband´s arms enveloped him immediately  
“I love you so much Cass. We have been together for 13 years now and we had a small lovely wedding but our family has grown and I feel like we could celebrate again with them, I would love to renew my vows in front of all them… I guess Sam and Gabe´s proposal stirred some memories …” said Dean blushing a little  
“It had been a long time since I have seen you blush like this” said Cass kissing him “I like it” Dean was going to say something but Cass cut him off and talked leaving Dean speechless “I would marry you one and a million times Dean, I feel the most fortunate man in the universe. I get to wake up in your arms every day, I have a beautiful and healthy daughter, you are a wonderful dad and I enjoy this everyday craziness by your side. We have the money for the wedding if you want but… I had another idea about what to use it for … may I tell you my idea?” Dean nodded “Let´s have another child”  
“Do you want to adopt again!” said Dean happily “I would like that very much Cass” Dean kissed him fiercely now “Let´s do that!” Cass smiled with Dean´s enthusiasm and they kissed him some more. Suddenly, Dean holding him stood up and headed outside towards Cass´s studio in the greenhouse.  
“Dean what?” asked Cass a little concerned in the beginning but his husband nuzzled in his neck and then took his earlobe in his mouth making him shiver “Let´s go make a baby Cass” say Dean amused, Cass laughed out loud “I think this is not how biology works Dean…” said playfully.  
“I am going to make love to you like a crazy man… just in case” and Like that Dean deposited Cass over the sketching table and stepping back took off his tshirt. Cass devoured him with his eyes, his beautiful beautiful Dean. Cass took off his tshirt mimicking his husband and drawn him close to kiss some more. Dean´s hand cupped Cass´s erection and moaned in his mouth.  
“Please Dean… I need your mouth on me” begged Cass and Dean complied … not that he absolutely loved to suck off his husband. Cass let Dean suck him first but finally he couldn´t stand still and started fucking his mouth, he moaned loudly but… hey that was why Dean had taking him down there instead than to their room. He increase the pace and Dean took it beautifully.  
“Deaaaan, I am so close” he warned him but Dean´s reaction was to tug his balls and add suction to his blowjob and Cass came into his mouth with a loud cry and ragged breath. “Fuck babe, this does it for me every time, looking at you on your knees for me, your pretty lips around me and those eyes on me…fuck”  
“I love to suck you and make you come undone only with my mouth Cass, but I am going to fuck you big time and make you all hard and horny again” said Dean and opened a drawer where they keep the lube hidden for sexy emergencies like this. He lubbed his fingers and manhandled Cass to turn around over the table and probed his fingers to his hole. Cass trembled in anticipation and then felt Dean drop a trail of kissed down his spine while he inserted two fingers in him. Cass groaned, the burn was delicious, Dean knew he liked the stretch that was why he started with two. Soon he had three fingers fucking him from behind and he was begging Dean to get inside him right now.

Barely three meters away on the other side of the garden, Gabriel and Sam were naked over a blanket on the darkest corner, they wanted to have sex under the stars when they heard Dean and Cass getting into the greenhouse.   
“Let´s go make a baby Cass” The heard from Dean´s and both Sam and Gabe stopped their handjobs.  
“I think this is not how biology works Dean…” Cass said and they could hear some giggling and clothes fumbling. “I am going to make love to you like a crazy man… just in case” reassured Dean. More clothes off and kissing. Gabe and Sam interchanged a look of surprise.  
“We should go Gabe” whispered Sam but Gabe resumed the handjob and did that twisting thing on the head that gave Sam a full body shiver and he dropped his head back into the towel “This is sexy… but you will need to be silent Sam” whispered Gabriel while driving him crazy with pleasure.  
“Please Dean… I need your mouth on me” they heard Cass say and Sam felt Gabe smile onto his skin and suddenly he trailed south. Sam was in awe… Gabe was going to suck him while Dean was sucking Cass. This was…. All kinds of wrong and very very dirty. Sam blushed like crazy but Gabriel´s mouth on him shifted his focus. He could hear Cass´s moans and encouraging words to Dean. It was such an unexpected turn on. Gabe was literally sucking his brains out his dick and he was having trouble keeping quiet.

“Deaaaan, I am so close” Sam heard and closed his eyes because this was making him so hot and Gabe was sucking him and he felt like he was going to come too.  
“Fuck babe, this does it for me every time, looking at you on your knees for me, your pretty lips around me and those eyes on me…fuck” Damm Cass and the dirty talking! Gabe pulled out and pressed at the base of his dick preventing himself from cumming and Sam wined in protest when Gabe stopped. 

Gabe smiled wickedly, took his tshirt he pushed a corner into Sam´s mouth to muffle his sound. Then manhandled him to lie in his belly and whispered in his ear “No cumming just jet, I want you to come only when I give you permission Sam” Sam whimpered and nodded frantically.

“I love to suck you and make you come undone only with my mouth Cass, but I am going to fuck you big time and make you all hard and horny again” They heard Dean say and Cass moaned in response.  
Gabriel fingered Sam open and imagined that the other two were up to the same because he could hear hush moans and fumbling coming from the greenhouse. Gabriel penetrated Sam slowly from behind and set a slow pace. Moans and cries came loudly from the greenhouse and Sam seemed out of himself.

“Yes! Yes! Ahhh Dean please please…. Ah ah yes like that …. Oh god please!” they heard Cass beg “You drive me crazy angel” Dean said while increasing his pace, even Sam and Gabe could hear the skin to skin slaps. The moans and cries were now constant and Gabriel increased the pace fucking Sam harder too. He admired the man´s stamina. He was still holding despite his need for cumming, Gabriel could feel it. He was tight and pulsing because he was trying to hold his orgasm at bay. But hearing the rough sex coming from the greenhouse and having Gabriel fucking him was way too much. Gabe felt pity for his fiancé and he whispered at his ear “Let go my love, cum for me” while increasing the pace like a mad man until Sam was painting the towel white underneath them coming untouched just seconds before Gabriel. 

Before he could realize he was about to scream his orgasm and that will discover their position to muffle himself he bit Sam on the shoulder without breaking the skin but hard enough that he knew he would leave a mark, he came inside Sam and lazily kept rocking and milking himself until going soft. They realized that all the backyard was in silence.  
Somewhere during this he had missed Dean and Cass´s orgasm but who could blame him having Sam for himself. “This is the kinkiest thing I have ever done in my life Sam” his fiancé kissed him lovingly and they laid there, naked under the stars. 

“I am happy Dean” said Cass and they heard Dean laughter “Well hell I hoped so”  
“I am trying to say something here Dean” Cass´s tone was now more serious  
“Alright?” said Dean and there was a silence. Sam and Gabe looked at each other wondering.  
“For a long time I was afraid. Afraid that my parents will come to drag me away from you. Afraid we can be out together and someone tried to hurt us. When you entered the FBI I had been scared of you being in danger but mostly about being alone…. After you got shot, the fear of losing you was overwhelming. I have lived in fear for so long…” Cass´s voice was melancholic  
“I am so sorry angel” said Dean and the sound of kissing filled the air.  
“Don´t be, you had been the only good thing in all that time. You fought for me, you kept me safe, you made me feel valuable, you encouraged me to be myself to pursue my art. We have been together half of our lives Dean” There was some wonder in those words  
“I am nobody without you Cass” said Dean lovingly  
“Don´t say that, you are brave, strong, caring and very stubborn. Even without me you will succeed in life” said Cass annoyed  
“In life? I don´t want a life if I am not sharing it with you Cass. I love you husband. I have always known about your fears, I am sorry I didn´t do more to sooth them”   
“You did all you could. I have always felt loved and protected, valued! And I haven´t ever felt valued for who I was before. You taught me how to be me Dean. I love you too. But the point I was trying to make before you distracted me was that I am happy now. I am not afraid anymore, does that even make sense? After all that happened in the last year?” asked Cass  
“It does Cass, because out family is now larger than ever, we is not you and me anymore. Despite the fact that you will always be the centre of my universe, now we have Mary. We had always had Sam watching our backs, but now you have your siblings back and I have Dad back… well we both have dad back because right now I am pretty sure he loves you even more than he loves me” Dean joked and Cass giggled  
“well hey I am a very lovable man… not my fault that I am adorable….” Said Cass cut by the cry of a baby “You got the baby monitor with you?” asked Dean surprised “I fucking love you my weird sex god husband!” Declared Dean. There was some cloth fumbling and some giggles. They heard Cass and Dean getting back in the house and finally they did too.

Once warm in their bed, Sam turned to Gabe and asked “would you like to have kid with me?” Gabe smiled and draped his arms around him “Nothing I would like more, you would be an excellent dad”  
“Really? Do you think so?” asked Sam surprised by Gabe´s faith in him  
“C´mon Sam, trust me on this one. I know” Gabe kissed him and they fell asleep together


	20. Happy birthday Dean

Today it was special, Cass made efforts to make it so. It was Dean´s 35th birthday. Cass had colluded with Sam, Gabe and John to make babysit Mary for the night. He had asked Dean to be ready to go out for dinner by 5 but he had no idea where they were going.  
By 5 Castiel was dressed impeccably with a very nice suit with a very elegant grey vest and a blue tie that matched his eye color and that was a present from Dean. When Dean came downstairs Cass held his breath because god dam! He was stunning. He was also wearing a suit, dark navy with a white bottom up shirt. He was not wearing a tie, he was otherwise wearing his shirt with the top two bottoms opened suggestively. Castiel licked his lips with hunger.  
“Wow Cass you look amazing!” said Dean getting close to drop a chaste kiss on his lips. Cass kissed Dean hungrily in response taking Dean´s breath away and taking control of his husband´s mouth.  
“Umm babe … are you sure you want to go out?” asked Dean “We can go back upstairs…” said Dean suggestively  
“Later Dean, dinner first” said Cass trying to recover control of himself. Cass went to the door and opened the door to the garage. “Let´s take your baby for a spin” said Cass making Dean´s eyes sparkle with happiness.   
“Where are we going Cass?” asked Dean getting the impala out from their garage.   
“I have a very special reservation for us, to the city, I will guide you as we go” Dean smiled and wondered what was his husband thinking. He followed his directions and ended up parking the impala in the empty parking lot of Bobby´s burger joint.  
“Cass?” Asked Dean  
“Get out, c´mon Dean!” said Cass stepping out of the car. He took his husband´s hand and dragged him to the door. He knocked and Bobby opened the door.  
“Bobby? What is going on here?” asked Dean  
“Welcome boys, you have a reservation for the VIP lounge right?” asked Bobby smiling at Cass, he opened the door that lead to the roof and they went up. There it was a little table with two plates and two chairs, there were little Christmas lights hanging from a pole illuminating the place faintly.   
“Cass… babe, this is…” Dean´s words got caught up in his throat with the emotion “You re-enacted our first date?”   
“Do you like it?” asked Cass  
“I love it, I love you!” said Dean.  
“Well guys I hope you like the burgers I made for you” said Bobby placing two plates with juicy burgers at the table “Here you got the keys Cass, I leave you both alone. Happy birthday Dean”  
“Thanks Bobby” Said Cass taking the keys and thanking him for all this trouble. Bobby still owned the building but he closed the burger joint years ago. He only cooked for them as a favour to Cass.

They had dinner, talked about the old times and kissed each other silly like they used to do when they were in that roof. After some hours, Dean suggested to move the party to bed. But Cass had other ideas. He asked Dean to let him drive and he gave Dean a sleeping mask to cover his eyes. He was going to drive them to the place they will spend the night.  
Cass drove for a long time, or that seemed to be a long time for Dean. He kept talking and asking Cass about that mysterious surprise. Cass kept him engaged but never revealing too much. The car then arrived to a location where the paved road ended and they were driving over an irregular road.  
“Where are we babe?” asked Dean nervous now  
“We are here, let me park and I will go get you out of the car” Cass parked the car on the best spot and got out. Moved around the car to Dean´s door and opened it. He took Dean´s hands and helped him out, Dean heard the door close and they took a couple of steps over the irregular road, it was covered with gravel.   
“We are here” Said Cass helping him out from the mask. Dean clenched his eyes at first but because it was already dark he got used to see again quite fast. They were standing on the front yard of a little house.  
“Oh god!” said Dean once he realized which house it was. He looked at Cass in wonder “What are we doing here Cass? Dad said he sold it” told him Dean  
“Yeah, he is right, he sold it. This house does not belong to your dad anymore. C´mon babe, follow me” Cass stepped towards the front porch and once he got to the door took a key from his pocked and opened the door. Dean looked at him intrigued. Dean followed Cass inside.  
The house looked amazing. It had been fixed, painted, refurbished and decorated. Cass pointed him towards the living room and Cass saw a nice and homey Livingroom area, Dean looked around and frowned.  
“They have a vinyl player like mine” said Dean looking at the music collection in the shelf. “Wait!” said Dean realizing that those where his vinyl “Cass… what?”  
“Dean this house does not longer belong to your dad, it belongs to us” said Cass waiting for Dean´s reaction “Happy birthday!” Cass pointed out around and Dean saw here and there things they had moved from their home in California. Some paintings, furniture that was in the storage unit, books …  
“I don´t know what to say!” Dean was serious and it started to worry Cass  
“You don´t like it …” Cass´s smile disappeared and Dean saw the fear in his eyes  
“No no no Cass” Dean held his husband close “I love it Cass, It overwhelms me. This place meant so dam much to me, is this real?” he asked  
“Yeah babe, it is ours for real. I told John how important this place was for you and he surprised me two months ago by giving me the documents. He put the house to out name and told me to fix it for you. So I did” Cass smiled again looking at Dean´s awe.  
“Oh god” Dean roamed around, Cass had done a great job remodeling. Dean walked all around the house and stopped at the bedroom door, he peaked inside and saw that the room was the same.  
“The mattress is new but once I saw it, I got such nice memories of this room that I couldn´t bring myself to renew it. Just used all I could and did minor things” Dean turned to Cass and kissed him passionately  
“I can´t believe you did all this for me!” said Dean looking at his husband in awe  
“What wouldn´t I do for you?” Cass smiled and dragged Dean towards the bed  
“Oh god! I can still close my eyes and remember how nervous I was the first time we made love in this bed Cass… dam I still feel like that when you touch me… like you are doing it for the first time”  
“You are such a sweet talker….” Said Cass  
“You love it… make love to me Cass, please” added Dean kissing his neck slowly  
“ hell yes!”

Cass made his point in worshiping his husband´s body. He kissed Dean softly, nibbled at his neck and earlobe, his hands softly caressed Dean´s strong body taking his clothes off one by one. When Dean was completely naked in front of him Cass dropped to his knees and took Dean´s cock in his mouth. Dean´s hands went to his hair and held him in place, his cock down Cass´s throat and felt Cass swallow once and again making Dean moan in despair. He let Cass´s hair go and he kept blowing Dean until he realized he was close. Cass manhandled him into the bed on his belly and Cass licked his whole. He opened Dean using his tongue and fingers enjoying the moans and shivers of his pliant husband underneath him.   
“Please … please Cass” said Dean completely undone.  
“What do you need Dean?” asked Cass while kissing up his spine  
“Please please get in me Cass” he begged in a haze of pleasure. Cass lubed his cock and slid in Dean  
“Oh Dean … I also remember how it was to make love to you for the first time. We have been always good at this, our bodies are made for each other, we are made to fit… oh and we fit so good babe!” Cass picked up a fast pace and fucked into Dean nonstop “After so many years, every time I slid in you I feel like it was that first time … but then I didn´t know what I was doing then and now I can play your body like the finest instrument Dean…”  
“Oh God please….. please….. oh fuck!” Dean moaned when Cass changed angle and brushed his prostate with his thrusts.  
“I know exactly where to lick” said Cass licking underneath his earlobe something that Dean loved   
“I know where to bite” explained Cass and proceeded to bite his neck strong enough to leave a mark  
“I know where to pinch” Cass twisted one of Dean´s nipples over and over again. Dean hauled with pleasure  
“I know what you like babe” Cass pulled out of Dean and smacked his ass loudly. “Turn around Dean” and he complied immediately. Cass took his husband´s legs and rolled them up exposing his hole and slid in again making Dean moan again with the intrusion.  
“I love you so much babe” said Dean pulling his husband for a kiss and then let his head fall back into the pillow while Cass fucked him good. Dean felt a warmth in his lower belly, he was going to cum.  
“Ohhh yeah babe!” moaned Dean  
“Do you like this Dean?” asked Cass fucking into him relentlessly “yes yes yes!” answered Dean loudly  
“Would you like to come on my cock alone babe?” asked Cass fucking him harder  
“Yeah I would…. Please make me come Cass” said Dean  
“I am going to fill you up babe” said Cass feeling himself go. He cummed inside Dean but kept fucking into the wet and sloppy hole, feeling his come get out with every push and make a mess of them and the bed. He didn´t care. He loved the wet slap noises that his dick was making when moving in and out of his ass. Dean screamed a moan and came abundantly all over himself.  
“Fuck that was intense” said Cass and Dean could only nod to agree.  
“Are we going to sleep here?” asked Dean  
“Yeah baby, the first night in our new home, baby free” said Cass cleaning them up and then getting back under the covers with Dean.  
“Happy birthday my love” said Cass  
“This is the best birthday of my life!” said Dean “well maybe the second best one…” Cass raised his head from the pillow to look at Dean wondering and asked “So.. which one was the best one?”  
“The best birthday I had ever had was the first one we spent living together … it was when I realized you were the one and only for me and that you loved me just as much as I loved you” said Dean  
“alright…?” Cass kept wondering what could have been that special about the first birthday in their home in California. Sam had come to visit and they celebrated it at home together, Cass baked Dean a pie and it had looked terrible because Cass had been so distracted by the phone … oh! Cass looked at Dean “It was the phone call… your dad called to wish you happy birthday…” It had been the first time they had talked after Dean leaving the house.   
“You really thought I didn´t know it was all your doing?...” Cass looked at him surprised “I overheard you Cass, on the phone with my dad the week before, convincing him to let Sam come over and begging him to call me on my birthday, telling him how important that was for me. Telling him how much I missed him and Sammy. Inviting my brother to come over to California was the best surprise present you could have given me but you went even further… after how much hate my family and your family showed you, leaving your ego behind and calling my dad begging him to talk to me… It meant a lot”  
“I didn´t know you knew about this… why didn´t you ever told me?” asked Cass turning red  
“Babe, You had already proposed and I was so sure of my love for you that I had already said yes, I was ready to spend the rest of my life by your side, but that day, when the phone rang and I answered…and I saw that special shine in your eyes. You loved me so much. That was the exact moment when I knew beyond any doubt that we would be together forever.”  
“Dean…” Cass kissed him because he was unable to express his emotions in any other way.  
“And now that we are being honest … there is a little bunch of moments like that, that I have treasured in a special way… I didn’t tell you about it because it feels silly once you say it out loud…” dean confessed.  
“Please tell me about them…” said Cass snooping into Dean´s embrace  
“Well, there is the first time we kissed in Bobby´s roof, or our first night here in this very same room” Dean smiled and kissed Cass “The day we got married when I saw you cry during my vows, I felt a special warmth in my heart because my words … that had taken so much time to write and I was so nervous to say out loud… those words were meaning as much to you as to me, that made me incredibly happy. There are many more moments like this … I specially recollect one day coming back from work and finding you and dad in the bathroom, you had him wrapped in a blanket, you were taking such sweet care of him that made my heart skip a beat. You cared about my dad and that made me love you even more.” Dean teared up and Cass cleaned his tears away, kissing him softly.  
“I remember the first time I saw you holding Mary” They both smiled at that memory.  
“Tonight, all this … you worked so hard for us… thank you Cass” said Dean holding him close.  
“I love you Dean, let´s get some sleep” Dean spooned him and they felt asleep fast after so many emotions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are getting close to the end...


	21. Charlie Winchester

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry people, I needed some drama and angst before the happy ever after ending that is approaching.  
> Hope you enjoy it!

When the adoption agency called them, they were excited. There was a 6 year old girl in need for adoption. The both accepted eagerly despite the terrifying background that little girl was coming from. Her dad had passed away when she was not even born, her mom remarried twice, first time the guy was a delinquent that ended up in Jail when Charlie was Mary´s age, the second time he was an abuser and a drunk that Castiel would like to strangle himself for taking such poor care of the kid. Charlie´s mother had died two years ago from an aneurysm, the kid was left solely in the stepdad´s custody and that had made Dean and Cass wonder how bad her childhood had been so far. One month ago, the stepdad got himself killed on a car accident when completely drunk and Charlie ended in foster-care waiting for adoption. She was a survivor and Dean and Cass were hoping to give her a home to settle down and be finally safe. But it was going to be difficult, they knew. Maybe they didn´t expect it to be this much…  
“Another girl” whispered Cass on Dean´s neck while cuddling in bed  
“yeah, tomorrow it is going to be a long difficult day” said Dean “Just remember she is not like Mary, it will take her a while to get to trust us, she has been thought a lot”  
“What if we cannot make her feel safe?” asked Cass and Dean hugged him closer because he had no answer for that, he also was afraid. “Who knows what her life has been like?”  
“We will give her a loving family, we will figure it out together, all of us” said Dean “Now go to sleep my beautiful angel” Dean kissed dozens of pepper kisses all over and smiled against his skin “I love you Cass, you are a great dad and I am very proud of being your husband”  
“I love you too babe, thanks for helping me feel alright, safe. I don´t know what I would do without you” Cass snuggled and closed his eyes.

Picking up Charlie had been exciting and terrifying half and half. She had her little pack of things ready, she was cute, blonde and silent. She also seemed to have quite a temper. Dean liked her already, and Charlie seemed to have taken a special affection to Dean almost immediately. Cass felt a little left out but he managed. They drove back home and they showed her the new room, they helped her unpack and settle in and Cass prepared lunch for them.  
“I don´t like this!” she said seriously “Looks gross”  
“Really? Cass´s food is very good!” said Dean “You don´t really want to try it? I am going to eat a lot of it!” said Dean looking sideways over to Cass who had a serious face.  
“Umm, if you like it, I may try. No promises” said Charlie. She started chewing her sandwich in silence. “So, you two already have a baby?” asked Charlie to Dean ignoring Cass completely  
“Yes, her name is Mary” said Dean  
“She is smaller than you, so technically you will be like a big sister to her” said Cass trying to interact with her. Charlie looked at him and said bitterly “I hope I don´t have to share my room or my toys with her, don´t like sharing!”  
“You each have your own rooms and she is too young to play with your toys Charlie, don´t worry about that” said Cass lovingly  
“How is it that you married him?” she asked Dean making him almost choke on his sandwich  
“Excuse me?” asked Dean  
“Well my dad used to say that two man married were called faggots … and that there had to be something very wrong in them to like being together… you look alright, why did you marry him?” Charlie looked at them with clear and open eyes and Dean Couldn´t believe those words coming out from the mouth of such an adorable baby girl.  
“Charlie, when two people love each other, it doesn´t matter if they are both males, both females or male and female. When a couple love each other, they live together, they marry and they want a family. It is normal babygirl, I am sorry but your dad was quite wrong about that. And that word… “ Dean´s voice trembled a little “ the word .. faggot? I would really really prefer if you wouldn´t say it ever again, it is not a good word” asked Dean looking up at Cass whose hand was still covering his mouth and his eyes were both panicking and terrified.  
“I still don´t understand but I won´t say that word again Dean” she said and continued chewing her food like nothing happened.  
Dean gave Cass a little side smile and rubbed his back trying to encourage him. The lack of interest of Charlie towards him was taking a toll on him. But he kept trying. Day 1 was no good start.  
Two weeks went by and Dean and Cass kept dealing as best as possible with a toddler and the newly adopted 6 year-old Charlie. Oh man, it had been exhausting and tense. She seemed to like Dean alright but she looked at Cass with curious eyes, judging and concerned. She made Cass nervous and sad, why couldn´t she like him too?.  
One night, Charlie was being extra difficult. Cass tried to convince her that she needed to take a bath but she had refused loudly. Dean was not home, he was doing a grocery run. So it was just Cass and Charlie, Mary was already asleep. “Dean will be home soon and you need to be clean and in your pajamas so we can all have dinner Charlie, please” said Cass for the eleventh time.  
“don´t wanna! Don’t wanna don’t wanna!!!!” had screamed the girl with a tantrum  
“Please, I don´t understand why you are refusing to take a bath, you like baths right?” said Cass trying to contain his increasing bad humor.  
“I do like baths, I just don´t like you!” she said bluntly and Cass felt it like a slap in his face. His eyes blurred with tears. It was too much, Charlie clearly hated him so much and he was miserable. This was not like he had expected it, at all.   
“Alright, I understand” Cass stood up and left the room silently. Charlie stood there sitting on the floor of her bedroom playing with her toys and Cass went downstairs and let himself cry because he felt terrible. When Dean had arrived a very silent and sad Cass helped him putt the stuff into the cabinets and asked him to go upstairs and check on Charlie “Please Dean, just go. See if you can get her to get a bath and put on her pajamas”   
“Is there something wrong Cass?” asked Dean when he realized how red his husband´s eyes were, he had obviously been crying.  
“Just go and do it, please. I need some time apart from her right now. I am angry and hurt and I am afraid I am going to lose it and she will hate me even more. I am going to bed, not hungry” Cass left the kitchen and a very worried Dean behind and went to sleep.  
“Charlie?” said Dean entering the room  
“Dean! So happy you are back! Castiel was being pushy!” she complained  
“Excuse me?” said Dean quite in awe.  
“He tried for a long time to make me take a bath!” she explained  
“So let me see. Cass asked you to do something, you disobeyed. He tried nicely for a long time and here you are still no bath and no pajamas… am I getting this right?” She opened her eyes widely and understood she was in trouble “When Cass asks you to do something, I expect you to obey him right away, do I make myself clear?” asked Dean serious  
“Yes Dean. Do you want me to take a bath?” she asked a little taken aback.  
“No, not anymore, we are going downstairs and getting some diner, then you will get on your pajamas and to bed. No bedtime stories for you tonight lady! I am quite upset with your behaviour. You have upset Cass and that is really mean. What is wrong with Cass? he is wonderful, he loves you so much already and you are way too harsh with him. This is not fair. You need to think about it” Dean explained. Dinner, pajamas and bedtime. Dean kissed her goodnight and went back to bed to Cass. He was already sleep. He got into bed with his loving husband and held him into his arms. “It gonna be alright Cass, you´ll see” Dean dropped a soft kiss of Cass´s hair.  
Cass was still awake when Dean came to bed but pretended to be asleep, he didn´t want to have a conversation about it, not right now. He felt Dean embracing him lovingly and heard him whisper “It is gonna be alright Cass, you´ll see” and he felt a light kiss that made tears run down his face again. Fuck he loved Dean so much.

To Castiel´s merit, when the next day started, He felt like he had jet another change of making Charlie stop disliking him. He prepared a nice breakfast and fed Mary, woke up Charlie with a smile and laid out the plans for the Saturday. Dean was going to help Sam fix some things and meanwhile Cass was going to take Charlie and Mary to the park. Then they were going to meet downtown to have lunch all together and later visit Grandpa John. Charlie seemed excited, she liked Sam and Gabe a lot. She liked John even more, who she started calling Grandpa John quite soon. She only seemed to dislike Castiel. He pushed those bad feelings away and tried to smile. Fake it until you make it, he told himself.  
Mary was already strapped in the portable car seat in the living room and Charlie was downstairs too when Cass realized he wanted a jacket for Charlie, He ran upstairs, got the jacket and then coming downstairs he was distracted, he didn´t see the plastic ball in the step. When he felt it is was too late, he tried to hold himself in the railing but he still had the jacket on his hand. He fell downstairs with a scream.  
When he opened his eyes, he saw a crying Charlie sitting next to him. How long had he been unconscious? Mary was crying too somewhere near his feet. He wanted to move but he couldn´t. He panicked he couldn´t feel his legs or his hands! Oh god! He tried to speak.  
“Charlie?” he whispered and she looked up to him. Still in tears  
“Cass? Are you ok?” she asked. Castiel smiled weakly because she was actually being nice to him. All it had talked was to almost kill himself.  
“I am hurt Charlie, can you take the phone from my jacket pocket?” asked Cass  
“Nu hu no no not moving from here” she said moving her head sideways and Cass realized she was holding his hand. He wished he could feel her.  
“Listen Charlie, thanks for holding my hand that helped me feel better but I am hurt, we need Dean to come home. Ok? You are a big girl, I trust you can do this, can we call him?” he said and that made Charlie move. She got his phone from the jacket and showed it to Cass. He tried to smile and nod. “Now you unlock it, do you remember how?” She nodded and unlocked the screen. “Do you see the icon that looks like a green telephone?”  
“Yes Cass, this one?” she showed him and touched it  
“Yeah, great, you are doing great, you dial 9-1-1 for me?” asked Cass. She did “Now click on the phone icon again and place the phone on my ear darling” she obeyed immediately  
“911 What is your emergency” answered a male voice  
“My name is Castiel Winchester, from 2597 Almond drive, I fell down the stairs, I am home with my two daughters and I can´t move. I need help. I need help immediately” Cass said  
“Alright sir, we are sending an ambulance your way, Could any of your kids unlock the door for us?” she asked  
“No, too small for that, break in, I don´t care. I need an ambulance fast. Hey Charlie, do you mind trying to give the pacifier to Mary and see if she stops crying? Please do this for me?” Cass wanted Mary to stop sobbing but he wanted Charlie to be far and distracted do he could talk with the 911 operator frankly “Listen, I can´t move at all. I can´t feel anything from my neck downwards. My husband is downtown, I might have been unconscious at least for 30 minutes and he is not expecting me in several hours, I need help. My husband’s number is 865 801 **24, please let him know what is going on, please please…” he broke down a little and felt some tears roll down his face when hearing the low battery warning. “The phone is almost out of battery, please help me!” he said to the operator before the line went dead. He hoped help was on its way, they were truly by themselves right now.  
“Cass…” asked Charlie “don´t cry please, does it hurt?” asked Charlie  
“Don´t worry beautiful, it is going to be alright” he said not very convinced himself.  
“I will hold your hand a little more so you can feel better” she said lovingly. She was showing a different side of her personality and that made Cass´s heart beat faster  
“Thank you Charlie, you are helping me so much” she smiled a little and Cass did too.  
“Please Cass don´t die like my other mommy, please…” she said nesting her head on his shoulder. Cass opened his eyes in surprise. They had some information about her stepfather, he had died on a car accident, she didn´t remember the other people in her mother´s life because she was just a baby. Her mom had died years ago from an aneurism but he had no idea Charlie remembered that. Was she there when it happened? Oh god! She was barely 4 years old…  
“I am not dying Charlie, and Dean is coming home too. Everything is going to be alright my darling. Do you remember your mommy? Do you want to tell me about her? I bet she was great” he asked trying to distract her from what was in front of her.  
“She had blue yes like yours. When she fell she didn´t talk anymore. When you fell you didn´t talk for a long time either and I was worried you were dead too” she said with a sad voice “I don´t want you to be dead Cass”  
“You were there when your mommy had her accident?” said Cass heartbroken for the kid  
“We were in the backyard, she fell, I held her hand until daddy came home. He was very angry… will Dean be angry at me?” She asked sobbing in his arm  
“What? Noooo no Charlie, look at me, look at me please “Cass asked her and finally she looked into Castiel´s eyes “Dean will be really proud of how good care you had been taking of me. You don´t have to worry Charlie, nobody blames you for this, it was an accident” Cass could hear the ambulance and maybe the fire truck approaching “Help is here, can you please go and sit next to Mary, hold her hand so she is not afraid?” Charlie did as she was asked and Cass closed his eyes in relief when he heard the firemen at the door.  
They burst the lock and opened the door, letting the emergency team get in and evaluate Castiel´s state. The fireman got the kids out. Cass told them who Dean was and Dean´s number so he could pick the kids up and told Charlie to take care of his sister until Dean arrived. She promised and kissed Cass in the cheek. They carefully placed a cervical collar on Cass and loaded him in the stretcher and into the ambulance. He saw some policeman. He was halfway conscious during the trip and the examination in the ER but they the doctor decided to sedate him to do further tests. Cass protested because he didn´t want to lose consciousness until Dean was there … but they did anyway.

When Dean got the phone call from the station he almost had a panic attack. He was with Sam when his phone rang, from the station on his free day… what had happened?. It was Jody, there had been an accident. Cass was at the hospital and they had the kids downtown at the station. His first thought was to be angry at Jody for not having called sooner but… he worried about Cass and the kids instead. He was so worried that Sam had to drive him over to the station.  
When he arrived he heard Charlie talk. “My daddy Dean will be here soon? How much soon?” she asked and Jody answered “Sure thing darling, he will be here in a jiffy, I am happy to finally meet you, your daddies and I are good friends! Everything is going to be alright”  
“I worry for my mommy” said Charlie and that made Jody rise her eyebrows “Your mommy?” she asked and Charlie explained.  
“Well Cass is not a mommy but he feels like my mommy… I don´t know…it is complicated. Dean says that when you love people it doesn´t matter if they are boys or girls… so Cass is my mommy even if he is not a girl alright?” she explained “He is so good with me and I am so naughty sometimes… I upset him a lot… is he going to be alright? She asked starting to cry.  
“Dean…” said Jody watching him silently cry by the door. Frozen while looking at Charlie, Sam behind him   
“Daddy don´t be mad at me please!” said Charlie hurrying into his arms and Dean lovingly hugged her as long as she needed.   
“I am not mad sweetheart, I am proud of you and that you helped Cass call 911, you are such a big girl! I am proud of you babe!” Dean kissed her and looked for Mary that was happily in Jody´s arms.  
“Are they alright?” asked Dean  
“Yes, any news from Cass?” she asked and that made Dean flinch  
“We are heading there right now. Ok darling, we are going to check on Cass alright?” Sam helped Dean get the kids in the car and drove to the hospital. Once there he asked for Castiel Winchester and soon a doctor came looking for him.  
“Officer Winchester?” he asked politely, his face was serious. Dean flinched and stood up walking away from the kids and Sam.  
“How is my husband?” he asked immediately  
“He is stable, we had to sedate him, he was very agitated” The doctor started to walk and Dean along him “He fell down the stairs and when he called 911 he said he wasn´t feeling anything below his neck” Dean muffled a cry with his hand “We performed some tests to see if he had damaged his spinal cord, I can tell you now he had recovered sensitivity in his arms, he had checked his involuntary responses and motility seems to be coming back in his upper body. Nothing on his legs so far”  
“Is he going to be paralyzed?” Dean asked afraid  
“Too soon to know, he had a hard blow to his head, his skull is broken in several places but instead of bleeding out, the blood accumulated on the intracranial space, increasing the pressure. We are monitoring him if the edema is not reabsorbing fast, we will have to drain the excess of fluid. This kind of injuries sometimes have as a side effect a lost in sensitivity of the lower part of the body, when the edema is gone, motility is recovered. We haven´t seen a fracture damaging the cord that would explain the paralysis, therefore there is hope. There is a lot os awelling in his cervical area will medicate him and redo the scans tonight.” the doctor said  
“Alright, we will have to hope then…” said Dean “Can I see him?”   
“Sure, room 315, he is sedated, he will be waking up in the next 4 hours. Please make an effort to keep him calm, he will have lots of questions but panicking will not help. Results will be back soon, I will tell you more as soon as possible” the doctor said with a reassuring look. Dean went back to Sam and explained what the doctor had told him. He asked if him and Gave could take the kids over to their house with dad and make sure they were alright so he could focus on Cass.   
Dean entered the room and saw Cass hocked up to all those machines and flinched. His amazing husband was lying there, he had never been so dam afraid. At least he was alive but, paralyzed? Wow that was something big. They had gone through big before but this was different. Dean didn´t know how to protect him this time. He sat down by his bed and cried. He loved Cass so much… why did this have to happen now? Now that they had finally a family and happiness… fuck! Dean felt like it was so unfair! He closed his eyes and laid his head over the bed holding Cass´s hand. A while later a soft cry of the door when opened made him look up and he was expecting the doctor but instead he saw his dad.   
“Oh Dean!” John moved towards Dean and enveloped him on a hug. “How is he doing?”  
“Dad oh god! What am I gonna do? Doctor said he might be paralyzed waist down… they don´t know for sure. He has bleeding in his brain and if that doesn´t stop they might need to get in into an emergency surgery … brain surgery dad! Oh god!” Dean started crying again.  
“Let´s have some faith here alright? Cass is strong, you are strong. Whatever happens you will deal with it, we will help you through it” John said sitting next to his son.  
“You didn´t need to come” said Dean  
“Are you kidding, first you are my son, I didn’t want you to be here by yourself, I know how much you love Cass. And second, Cass had been there for me at my lowest, if was only fair I came over to see if there was anything I could do for him” John said with a sight. “Sam was fussing over the kids and Gave was on the phone with Anna and Michael very worried. I am guessing they will pop up sooner than later”  
“I heard the 911 call, it was bad dad…fuck!” Dean said trembling “It must have been terrifying to Charlie and Mary…” Dean said worried  
“Charlie was quite affected by everything, She couldn´t stop talking about it, she called Cass her mommy” said John with a funny face “She will be fine as soon as you and Cass are back home, you will see. And Mary… well she is too young to actually remember anything. She is just fine.”  
“Yeah, you know the funny thing. Charlie and Cass had struggled to get on well, she had been very difficult and I know Cass felt hurt and left out. We knew it was going to be difficult to adopt an older kid and she came from a troubled home but…it has been easy for me and very hard for Cass. I was wishing so hard they could bond over something… I never expected it to happen in this way…” was saying Dean when Cass interrupted   
“Me neither…I guess that is the upside of this crappy story ah?”  
“Cass!” Dean said holding his hand “Thanks god you are awake”  
“I will go call the doctor” Said John leaving them alone.  
“Hey I feel your hand!” said Cass but he couldn´t move much, he still had a cervical collar.  
“Oh Cass you scared the crap out of me! Babe I thought I lost you! I cannot live without you babe… you know that” said Dean softly kissing his husband´s lips. Cass smiled a little  
“So is this as bad as it looks?” said Cass referring to his body  
“Doctors don´t know yet, there is some swelling in your brain, you broke your skull in several places. You were unconscious for a while, thanks god you recover consciousness and called 911”  
“Yeah, well I had some help, Charlie was there with me, she held my hand the whole time Dean, she cared for me” Cass smiled again but closed his eyes and his lip trembled a little.  
“It is alright babe, I know this is too much, you don´t have to hold you tears for me. I am here, we can cry together and much as you need” Dean said and that made Cass start crying and sobbing. Watching his husband break, Dean cried by his side holding his hand and whispering reassuring things at his ear. “We will get through this, I promise” “I will always be by your side” “I love you Cass” Cass was so exhausted that listening to Dean´s loving words he fell asleep again.

 

When he opened his eyes it was hours later. Gabriel and Anna were there in the room   
“Hey Cass” said Anna lovingly “good to see you awake brother”  
“Yeah, seeing you lying there was scary as fuck” said Gabe  
“Yeah, thanks guys for coming over. Where is Dean?” he asked  
“Bathroom break, he hadn´t left you for a freaking minute. He is worried about you, so we offered to be here meanwhile he went to the bathroom and change clothes that we brought for him” said Gabe. “Charlie sends kisses for you” Gabriel said making Cass smile.  
“Are they alright? She was very nervous… I worry about her … she said some things about … her biological family … she worried me a lot” said Cass concerned  
“She had some nightmares and Sam slept with her tonight but otherwise she is alright. She will be fine as soon as you are both back home. You will see” said Gabe holding his brother´s hand reassuringly.  
“How are you feeling Cass?” asked Anna  
“A little less lightheaded than before…wait! What time is it?” he asked  
“Almost noon” she said  
“Wow I slept that long?” he wondered  
“Almost 18 hours Cass…”said Dean entering the room and he smiled at his husband “Is good to see you awake darling” he kissed Cass softly and Cass saw Dean´s eyes full of sentiment. Love and relief.  
“Sorry, I needed a long nap” Joked Cass and Dean shacked his head smiling.  
“Doctor said he had the results of the scans and that he was coming over to talk to us and make some reflex tests” explained Dean and he saw worry on Cass´s eyes. Dean held his hand and Cass moved his thumb over dean´s hand to tell him how thankful he was for the support “Everything is going to be fine Cass”  
“Guys do you mind giving us some privacy with the doctor… I know you are concerned but I would be more comfortable if It was just Dean and me…I hope you don´t mind” asked Cass. Gabe looked concerned but Anna nodded and pushed Gabe out  
“C´mon Gabriel, don´t be difficult.” Anna said  
“Hey boys, Michael is outside crazy worried but he didn´t want to get inside, you should probably calm him down a little…” said Dean while the in laws got out  
“Michael didn´t want to come in? why?” Cass asked  
“You know he is still kind of concerned about how he has behaved towards you along the last decade…he is worried sick but he is afraid to see you in pain… he told me he was gathering courage” confirmed Dean  
“Silly Michael… I have long forgiven all that. I keep telling him” said Cass  
“Yeah, it seems he hasn´t forgiven himself that much though” said Dean but his words were interrupted by the doctor entering the room. They both held their breaths because the words they were about to hear could very well define the rest of their lives.  
“Hello Castiel, good to see you awake and aware. I have the results from your tests, all of them and I need to say that I am very positive” The doctor showed them in the screen of his ipad a scan, there were Cass´s bones. “You can see here there is a severe compression of your cervical area which is normal in this kind of lesions, but as you can see there is no severe spinal lesions. Therefore the lack of sensitivity you are feeling in your legs right now is certainly due to the cerebral hemorrhage” The doctor changes the image and now there were looking at Cass´s brain. Cass looked concerned that was a big hemorrhage “It looks messier that it really is. See there are several fractures on your skull, nothing too severe, they will heal by themselves. As for the hemorrhage, it has already stopped growing by last night and today we calculated a 10% shrinkage already, so it seems the pressure is reducing by itself, there will be no need of surgery and slowly you should recover sensitivity and motility in your lower half Castiel”  
“Really? I am going to be alright?” asked Cass closing his eyes in relief  
“Yes, I am confident. Beware that you will need some physical therapy and massages for the cervical area.. for a long time but you will be able to carry with a normal life soon. You will have the cervical collar for another day and then we will see. I know it is very uncomfortable but for now it is necessary” the doctor finished “If you guys have any questions, please …”  
“How long will it take until he recovers sensitivity in his legs?” asked Dean  
“Might be 1-2 days… it will depend on the rate of decrease of the hemorrhage” said the doctor   
“So no idea when he will be back home?” asked Dean again  
“He won´t be discharged in the next 5 to 7 days for sure. Maybe more, sorry I know that you want him home and healthy but Cass, you have been very lucky, you need to recover, no speeding up the process because that might carry long term consequences, you have a family, you need to recover properly for them” said the doctor and both Dean and Cass agreed.  
“Thank you doctor, it would be great if you can update my siblings outside… so they leave us alone for a minute more?” asked Cass  
“Sure Castiel, try to rest. Dean, I asked the nurse to get you a side cot if you wish to spend the night today too at least you won´t have to sleep in that uncomfortable chair” Dean thanked the doctor and focussed on Cass  
“You are going to be fine” he said kissing his hand.  
“I was terrified, I am still terrified. Not feeling my own legs is scary babe, you cannot imagine… when I woke up on the floor with the kids crying and I realized that I couldn´t move at all… paraplegic was a terrifying word…” said Cass breathing deep  
“Yeah, fucking scary indeed” said Dean and he moved to kiss Cass  
“So, Charlie called me her mommy?” said Cass smiling again  
“Yeah, how about that! She said she feels like you are her mommy even though you are a man … gosh babe who knows what goes thought the mind of a kid right?” said Dean  
“She was there when her mother died, she told me…she said she thought I was dead too, like her…. That is too much for a little kid like her… fuck no wonder she was pissed at me and at the world in general” said Cass  
“Not at me…she loved me instantaneously” said Dean beaming  
“Yeah yeah show off, I am proud of the connection you both have… I felt a little left out though ...” he admitted  
“I know babe, we knew it was going to be hard but it is unfair it had been especially hard for you, you that wanted her so much in the beginning. But I knew that as soon as she let you in, she would see how wonderful you really were and that she would love you as much as I do” Dean kissed him again and to do that he placed his hand over Castiel´s leg. Cass immediately flinched.  
“Dean! I… I think I felt that!” said Cass and his eyes filled with tears.  
“Really? Can you feel my touch, you are getting better fast, I am so happy!” said Dean caressing his tight.  
“I definitely feel your touch Dean” said Cass relaxing finally into his husband´s touch “I love you” he whispered closing his eyes for a while.


	22. The future

Two days later Dean took Cass back home. Charlie was the first one that hugged him. John and Sam and Gabe were also there but Charlie couldn´t stay away from Cass. When bedtime arrived, Cass took her to her room and tucked her in.  
“Cass? Are you going to be ok?” she asked with her lovely big eyes focused on him  
“Yes, sweetie, thanks to you, I am going to be fine” said Cass kissing her forehead. Charlie giggled and held his hand  
“I am happy that you are here with me… I would be very sad if you were gone … daddy Dean would have been very sad too” she said “Cass? … do you think I can call you daddy too?” she asked  
“Charlie my love, you can call me daddy Cass of you can call Dean just daddy and call me papa?”  
“papa?” she asked …and pondered the offer “I think that will be ok”  
“I love you Charlie, try to get some sleep alright?” he kissed her again  
“I love you too papa” she said tentatively and then smiled when she saw Cass smile too  
Two weeks later, Dean took Cass out on a date. Gabriel, Sam and John were on babysitting duty with the girls. Cass had smiled widely when he saw Dean all dressed up for him. If you had asked Dean he would have swear that Castiel had blushed.  
They went to a nice restaurant, gave a nice walk downtown, stopped by the candy store and got some ice cream and they ate it hand in hand while walking along main street downtown.   
“I know I don´t say it enough, but I love you Cass” his husband said  
“You do show me, all the time babe” Cass kissed him softly “Take me home and let´s enjoy our children-free night? Yes?” whispered Castiel in Dean´s earlobe.  
“Damm you are perfect for me” said Dean holding his hand again and tugging him towards the impala. They never made it home, 5 minutes later they were having the hottest sex in the car. Dean was fucking Cass from underneath him and he had his husband laying up on him. Holding his knees up and letting Dean manhandled him while he was fucking into his relentless. All the car windows steamed and their sweaty hot bodies displayed on the back seat while Dean kissed him softly.   
“Let´s go home, I need a shower” said Cass “I am sticky… we might be getting too old for car sex…” said Cass making Dean laugh loudly  
“No way Cass, I was about to suggest shower sex…” Dean said  
“We might be getting too old for that too Dean…” Cass said “I fell down the stairs like an old man and almost killed myself” Suddenly Dean´s face got serious “Sorry, what a way for me to kill the mood… sorry” he held Dean´s face and kissed him.  
“The idea of losing you makes me crazy babe. I came so close…” said Dean.  
“I can only promise you that while I am in this world, there will never be anybody else in my hear apart from you and our babies” said Cass “I don´t know what the future holds Dean, but I do know that I love you”  
“I love you too Cass” said Dean kissing his husband´s neck and shoulders “Let´s go home”

And what a future they had.  
On their 10th wedding anniversary, Dean and Cass renewed their wedding vows in a beautiful ceremony with all their loved ones beside them. Dean gave up FBI for good and settled down to be the town sheriff permanently. Sam and Gabe got married and they adopted a little boy, Tom.  
John got over his cancer completely and despite the continuous medical check ups and latent fear or relapse he lived a long life and enjoyed his grandkids.  
Cass started a set of sculptures again, got a very nice event in the gallery downtown and attracted a lot of people. Crowley showed up and bought it, paying a small fortune for them that Dean and Cass put on a bank account for Mary and Charlie´s university fees.  
Life was good, when you shared it with the right person. Charlie got her first boyfriend and Dean got pissed. Cass was also worried but found the protectiveness of his husband quite amusing. Not too long after, Mary got home and confessed she like girls and that she wanted to go to prom with her best friend/girlfriend Susan. Charlie was very supportive of her.  
Cass and Dean worried, it was difficult for them to deal with the fear that someone might target their babygirl just because she was gay. There were situations here and there but Dean felt a pinch of happiness to see that their town, had changed. Their daughters were out on a double date and everything was normal.  
“You know it is a relief to see that Mary can hold her girlfriend´s hand and go out on a date … just like that…” said Dean  
“Yeah, not like our times …” said Cass “Things have changed. I think we changed things Dean” Cass wondered  
“It surely looks like it. I think we have turned this place around a little” he agreed  
“I sometimes wonder if I could talk to that Castiel, the one that was afraid of everyone knowing his secret, afraid of his family…” said Cass lost in thought.  
“If I could go back and see that Castiel … I would tell him to stop worrying that his Dean will always be by his side” said Dean kissing Cass´s shoulder.  
“Umm he would have appreciated that but somewhat he had always known that you loved him enough to stay” said Cass turning around and kissing Dean. They were seating in the garden, they had a nice and round rattan sofa where they were now holding each other.  
“Umm umm” hummed Dean while returning the kiss “you know we have the house to ourselves”  
“Sound like you are propositioning me Mr. Winchester?” said Cass amused  
“I know you are a married man but it seems I can´t stop thinking about you Mr. Winchester” said Dean kissing down his throat and collarbone.  
“What do you have in mind?” asked Cass blushing  
“Well the night is warm and beautiful, we are alone … I am just going to get you naked here and now” said Dean while unbuttoning Cass´s dress shirt  
“In the backyard?” asked Cass  
“right here yes, I am going to get you baked and I and going to go down on my knees and suck you so good and nice that you won´t be able to hold it together babe” Dean whispered at his ear  
“Oh fuck” was the only thing Cass mastered to say 

 

Life was good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And this was it. I know it was a short chapter ending BUT i felt that if I didn´t stop it I would continue to write about them forever. I love the bravery of this Cass and Dean, who knew they were made for each other and despite the society, the town and their families they managed to build a life together. With their bravery they made the world a better place. I am in love with them.
> 
> I hope you like it too.


End file.
